


To Be Whole

by far_from7



Category: Avatar: Legend of Korra, Korrasami - Fandom
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-09-06
Updated: 2016-09-19
Packaged: 2018-02-16 09:10:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 62,434
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2263971
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/far_from7/pseuds/far_from7
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the aftermath of her fight with Zaheer, Korra is a broken shell of the strong and powerful woman she once was. To learn to be whole again, she must reevaluate her life, and what is important in it. Asami Sato has been at Korra's side, and the emotional strain being there for her friend has caused prompts her to open up to new experience. Both learn new things about themselves and each other on their journey to be whole. </p><p>*Currently undergoing massive maintenance. No new chapters will be added until an entire rework is completed*</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Asami

There was a terseness in the air that was almost suffocating in the way it hovered and draped itself around those present in the room. Its weight heavy and oppressive, filling the space more completely than any of the small noises that escaped as Korra aimlessly pushed her food around in her plate, her eyes glazed over and sightless. It was a quiet afternoon, as tended to be the usual on Air Temple island, but lately, the once meditative and healing silence had begun to take on an almost hostile quality. 

At least whenever Korra was present. 

Plastering the most sincere and gentle smile she could manage around the knot slowly twisting itself around in her stomach, Asami leaned across the table. 

“Korra”, Asami hedged.

Other than a slightly aggravated twitch of her lips, Korra gave no indication that she had even heard. Asami sighed, the sound a long and dejected whistle of air as she resigned herself to what had become almost a daily ritual over the past few weeks. “Korra. Please. You need to eat.”

The knot in Asami’s stomach yanked tight and doubled itself at the way Korra’s eyes flashed. With a grunt, Korra angrily threw her chopsticks down and leaned back defiantly in her chair. 

“I’m not hungry,” Korra replied with a petulant frown, crossing her arms as if to further prove her point. Asami noted with a painful twist the slight shake of the smaller girl’s arms as they folded clumsily in front of her. Her once toned shoulders and biceps were noticeably thinner from weeks of disuse, for trying to accomplish anything more strenuous than the basics of feeding herself resulted in so much pain, every attempt had left Korra a sweaty and shaking mess. 

Every day they did this. Every day Asami tried to coax and plead with her friend to eat, knowing full well that Korra was going to resist and refuse seemingly only for the reason that she could. Even though they BOTH knew that every time she went to a healing session on an empty stomach, the result was guaranteed to be messy and painful. 

Asami bit back the grunt of frustration and only managed to keep from scowling due to years of schooling her face into expressionless masks at executive meetings with corporate sharks scrutinizing every moment for even a hint of weakness. 

With a deep breath to steady her growing irritation, Asami pushed forward, taking her turn in this stupid game Korra insisted on playing. Every day. Without fail.

“Korra, you haven’t eaten all day. You have a healing session later, and you know what happens when you don’t.” 

Korra looked up and grimaced in what looked like disgust, meeting Asami’s calm and gentle gaze with an angry glare. 

For weeks Asami had been taking Korra to those healing sessions and they always left the injured woman exhausted, weak, and if possible, even grumpier. Asami couldn’t blame her though. Those sessions were brutal. The healers tried everything they could think of to help restore the broken Avatar back to her previous health. Deep tissue massages, acupuncture, physical therapy, water bending healing… They’d done it all. And nothing seemed to be working. Asami had begun to wonder if the injuries weren’t all the result of the havok the poison had wreaked on her body.

At this point in the game, Korra usually either dramatically shoveled all the food in her mouth at once, glaring up at Asami spitefully the whole time, or shut down altogether, refusing to acknowledge Asami’s presence until after the healing session. Usually to mumble a weak “I’m done” after Asami had patiently held her hair back as Korra viciously dry heaved from having gone through with a healing session on an empty stomach. 

Today however, was different. 

With a dejected and angry sigh that almost perfectly reflected what Asami herself was feeling at the situation, Korra sharply turned her head to the side, breaking their brief moment of eye contact. 

“What’s the point?” Korra mumbled. Asami felt a stab of sadness at Korra’s angry and dejected tone.

“What do you mean?” she hedged carefully. While she hadn’t quite experienced this exact version of this conversation, history had proven that Korra was usually only one real or imagined slight away from an outburst, and her unpredictable volatility had left Asami in a constant state of uneasiness. 

An uneasiness that was unfortunately entirely justified. 

In a whirlwind of motion, Korra balled both her hands into fists and brought them down onto that table with a resounding BANG, making Asami jump in her seat.

“Nothing is working!” Korra yelled in exasperation. “I can’t walk, I can’t sleep, and everything hurts all the time.” Korra drew in a deep breath, her eyes flashing and arms shaking as they gestured wildly, fully letting herself go to her anger. “Nothing is getting better! And those healing sessions?” Korra barked out a humorless laugh. Asami flinched at the sound. “Those healing session are practically torture that leave me feeling worse than I did going into them! I mean honestly! At least Zaheer had been honest when he said he was trying to kill me!”

Korra heaved from the exertion of her outburst, glaring daggers at Asami through the unkempt fringe of her bangs that hung wildly in her face. Asami, like always, had patiently offered to help Korra pull the unruly mess into her trademark wolf tail, but Korra hadn’t allowed Asami to so much as brush it in days. 

Asami felt her stomach twist painfully. Though Korra’s words definitely echoed her own thoughts, she didn’t think it was entirely fair to blame it all on the effectiveness of the healing. Korra had initially made a serious effort to do what she could to expedite the healing process. However, after several weeks of minimal improvement, it was almost as though she had given up hope. She was obviously deeply depressed. Lately her mood range consisted of angry and mean, to lethargic and hopeless. Her attitude had become extremely negative and lately only Asami had the patience or fortitude to bear the moody Avatar for longer than the briefest of encounters.

The silence of the room was only sporadically punctuated by the sound of Korra’s labored breathing. Though still oppressively heavy, the stillness had taken on a new and subtle texture. What had before been a smooth and suffocating blanket was now lined with razor sharp blades. Asami was safe now, but any movement at all felt as though it was capable of cutting her to the bone. Though Asami knew it would only result in further provoking Korra in her irate state and leave Asami a bleeding mess, she couldn’t stop herself from saying what was on her mind. This game had officially gotten old, and if Korra was going to change her playbook, Asami was going to follow suit. 

“You’re not exactly helping,” Asami said smoothly, defiantly catching Korra’s eyes when they flicked up to her face at her words. 

Korra almost seemed to double in size as she drew herself up in her chair. Flinging an arm out, she angrily flung the bowl of noodles off the table, leaning forwards menacingly in her rage. “Excuse me?!” 

Asami sighed and weighed her options. She could let the issue drop, but knew that the things she had to say Korra definitely needed to hear. From day one, Asami had been by Korra’s side, helping her dear friend in every way she could. As the weeks had passed and Korra had become more and more depressed, visits from the rest of ‘Team Avatar’ had become less and less frequent. Asami understood that everyone else had lives and jobs to get back to, but she felt bad for Korra. To her, it probably felt like she was being abandoned by everyone.

Asami couldn’t blame them, though. While everyone loved and cared for Korra immensely, being around her lately was close to abusive. Korra was pretty much the most important person in Asami’s life, and there was no way she would abandon her friend in any way, but Korra needed a swift kick in the ass. And since no one else was going to do it…

Asami chose her words carefully. “Look, Korra. You went through something terrible. Everyone knows that. I can’t even imagine the pain and fear you endured-” Before Asami could continue, Korra scoffed loudly, the sound high and ugly as it escaped the back of her throat. 

“No! You can’t! No one can!”

Korra was heaving in her rage, her face that had once smiled as easily as she breathed contorted in disgust and contempt. 

For the first time, Asami felt no sympathy or remorse, and the twisting of her gut was less out of compassion and more due to the way her tenuously held control on her own anger was starting to warble and stretch. 

Control that was thoroughly destroyed at Korra’s next words, spat out with a venom that was nothing but ugly in its intensity. 

“Not that anyone even cares anymore.”

Asami felt her control snap like a physical blow to the chest, causing the next words that came out of her mouth to tumble out with unexpected force and volume. 

“Korra. STOP!”

Korra’s eyes widened in shock and outrage as she visibly recoiled, jerking back in her chair as though she had been physically struck. Before she had a chance to say anything back, Asami quickly continued her speech, intent to get it out in the open. Who knew? Maybe she could get the other girl so mad that she wouldn’t have a choice but to start walking and bending again, if only to accomplish the goal of throttling her.

“It’s honestly no wonder you’re not making any progress. You’ve given up hope! If you had it your way, you would sit around and mope all day just wallowing in how terrible you feel.”

When Korra remained silent, Asami pressed on. She attempted to soften her tone, but weeks of frustration and anxiety were bubbling to the surface and she couldn’t completely remove the bite from her tone. “Look. I’m not saying you don’t have it rough. You’ve been through more than most can possibly hope to survive but if you don’t have hope and the drive to help yourself get better or adjust or….whatever, how do you honestly expect anyone else to?”

Asami was standing by the time she finished speaking, leaning over the table so she towered over the smaller woman before her. Her tone had taken on a decidedly pleading quality at the end. Her words were from the heart as she stared Korra down, pleading with her eyes to please please just listen and reflect on what was being said. To actually hear her for a change instead of just react.

She saw the moment when Korra shut down. Her eyes narrowed until they were barely slits, her face silently screaming contempt and derision. 

Asami’s heart constricted in her chest at the look. While it wasn’t the first time she had seen it, it was certainly the first time it had been directed at her.

“I’m sorry your Avatar is such a disappointment,” Korra growled, her tone so cold and vicious Asami couldn’t stop the shiver that raced down her spine.

Asami dropped her head, hanging it loosely between her locked arms from where they were still braced on the table. 

“This isn’t like you Korra. We aren’t trying to help you because we want the Avatar back.” Asami ground out between clenched teeth. She silently counted her breaths, reigning in the hurt and frustration that was bubbling wildly at the surface. Once she was certain she had her temper back under control, Asami heaved another sigh, leaning into the table before pushing herself off and leveling Korra with a look that was open and full of concern and care and love. Because while Korra was being mean and rude and overall NOT enjoyable to be around in any way, at the end of the day, she was Asami’s best friend. Korra held a place in her heart that rivaled - if not topped- every other person in her life. Despite her recent displays, Asami knew that at her core, Korra was one of the most kind, loving and caring people she knew. And yeah. She cared about Mako and Bolin and Tenzin and all the others. But she loved Korra. As difficult as it was to remind herself at times, Asami knew that Korra’s outbursts and cruelty were stemmed from a deep rooted despair and fear that was born from a trauma no one could really hope to understand. 

“We’re trying to help you because we want our friend back. I want my friend back.”

Asami wasn’t quite able to stop the way her voice broke at the end, however Korra didn’t move. She remained unflinching in her glare.

Asami felt her heart twist again painfully in her chest. The moves of the game maybe had been a little different this time around, but the outcome was -predictably- all too familiar. 

Despite the twists and plays and moves, both of them had lost. 

Asami was suddenly completely overwhelmed by the feeling, and the ache was only ramping up in intensity the longer she stood in the razor edged silence that once again settled oppressively around her shoulders. Asami closed her eyes and released the breath she had pent up in her chest, her shoulders sagging with the exhale. Pulling in a deep breath through her nose to fight back the prickling she could feel in the corner of her eyes, she sightlessly turned and walked out, pushing her chair to the side in her haste. 

The sound of her chair scraping across the stone floor was almost offensive as it pierced the tense silence that had settled over the room. 

Asami could feel the hateful glare stabbing her in the back as she walked towards the doorway. 

It was very clear Korra was so deep in the hell she had created that she’d given up entirely. For her to have even a chance at restoring her body back to its former glory, she needed to start with her mind and Asami had a feeling that that healing process was going to be much more difficult. While Asami hated that she had to be the one to deliver this particularly difficult message, she only hoped that by having someone finally stand up to Korra, she would snap out of it and really begin to heal.


	2. Korra

Korra glared at Asami’s retreating figure until she had cleared the doorway and was out of sight.  
There was a boiling in the pit of her stomach, and it had nothing to do with the hollow rumbling that Korra had forcefully been ignoring for the better part of an hour. Asami’s words bounced around in her head, clanging and clanking against the hollowness that been steadily swallowing her as day after fruitless day with no improvement passed. There was a small voice in the back of her head that was pleading with her to calm down and think, but it was dwarfed and ultimately drown out by the hurt and confusion that was roiling unpleasantly inside of her. 

For weeks, Korra had watched as her friends and family had begun to pick themselves up and move on with their lives. Tenzin had resumed his search for air benders, although he himself stayed at the island to greet any new recruits that arrived, responding to the world wide offer of training and community. Mako was diligently working his way up the ranks in the police force, and Bolin was probably happy as a clam-turtle, wrapped up in the bliss of his new relationship with Opal. Everyone was healing and recovering and moving on from the horrible battle against the red lotus. 

Everyone but her. 

NO. She was stuck in a chair, unable to fend for herself or accomplish even the most basic of tasks without some form of aid. Everyone else was healthy and happy and fine, while Korra was more broken than she had ever thought possible. The endless loop of the injustice of it all played itself over and over in Korra’s mind, a familiar and constant presence. 

In her anger, Korra replayed the interaction with Asami over in her mind and if anything, felt a strange sort of vindication. Of course Asami would leave. Everyone else had. 

Ever since her fight with Zaheer, someone had always been there to help her, and most of the time, that person was Asami. Whether it was getting dressed, eating, or any of the hundreds of other menial tasks you don’t realize make up day to day life until you can’t do them, Asami had constantly been there, never complaining and always with a hopeful and encouraging energy.

And most certainly never yelling at her.

The feeling was short lived.

Korra wasn’t blind. She had absolutely taken note of how people frequently saw her being rolled down a hallway and quickly retreated back into whatever room they had come. At the time, Korra had taken a sick kind of satisfaction seeing how much people were going out of their way to leave her alone, but with the echo of Asami’s words ringing in her ears, Korra began to feel the dark and oppressive tint of shame coloring the edges of her mind.

As much as she didn’t want to admit it, Asami was right. She had given up hope. Even though it had been weeks since the Red Lotus had administered that horrible poison, she could still feel the pain and ache as though it were yesterday. The muscles in her arms and legs felt like they were on fire whenever she tried to move them too much, and even thinking about bending made her head hurt so bad it felt as if her skull would split in two. While she had initially braved the therapy and healing sessions everyone insisted would one day make a dent in the destruction that had been wreaked upon her body, the lack of progress made her feel more broken than when she had started.

The only thing that had been keeping her going was Asami.

Asami, who would pick her up when she fell and somehow made Korra feel as though needing help doing the simplest of tasks wasn’t quite as cripplingly shameful as she had thought it would be. Asami, who had taken her to every healing session with a smile, and picked her up every time with one to match.

And now Korra had even driven that person away. While she knew people were only trying to help, she had practically spit in their face every time they made the attempt. Seeing the dwindling hope in the eyes of those around her only had verified her feelings, but right then, she had the overwhelming and sudden realization that they were only reflecting the lack of hope in hers. The only person who hadn’t hinted at giving up on her in any way was Asami. The slight tint of shame blossomed so ferociously in Korra’s chest, her breath abruptly skittered and stumbled to a stop. 

The fight replayed itself again in Korra’s mind, but this time there was no feeling of vindication. No smug satisfaction. In fact there weren’t any positive feelings at all. Instead, every one of her hurtful and angry outbursts pressed and weighed down on her chest, constricting her diaphragm and choking her in its intensity. And layered over it all, the vivid memory of the sadness and hurt on Asami’s face as she had stared Korra down after pleading with her to just stop, was plastered firmly and unwaveringly in her mind’s eye, working as some kind of amplifier to all of the feelings filling her lungs like a toxic and viscous sludge, making it difficult to breathe. 

Korra had no idea how long she had been sitting there, clutching her chest as she fought through the waves of remorse and shame before Tenzin entered the room, declaring his presence with the characteristic clearing of his throat. In her misery, Korra studiously avoided Tenzin’s eyes as he asked how she was doing, the cheer in his voice obviously forced and only thinly veiling his apprehension and unease as he approached her chair. 

The observation did not help in the slightest. 

“Asami said that you might need some help getting to your healing session”, Tenzin hedged, slowly approaching Korra as though she were an unpredictable and dangerous predator and not a broken girl in a wheelchair. 

Korra’s stomach clenched uncomfortably at Tenzin’s words, her unease at the pending healing session resurfacing with a vigor that honestly caught her off guard. In the wake of her encounter with Asami, she had actually forgotten all about it. The reminder only served to darken Korra’s mood even further, and she closed her eyes against the nauseating swirl of anxiety and shame and regret that seemed to suddenly make up at least 90% of her existence. Cutting herself off from that one sense helped her center herself enough where she was able to push the feelings down and out of the way enough to grunt noncommittally to indicate she had even heard. 

She was vaguely aware of Tenzin trying to make small talk as he wheeled her over to where the water healers were staying, but he obviously had become pretty used to being ignored because her silence didn’t even phase him. Like usual, everyone they encountered on their way gave her wide berth as she was wheeled through the compound, but seeing this only made Korra feel worse.

As she was wheeled closer and closer to the healing hut, she steeled her resolve. No more self pity. Yeah. The universe had dealt her a pretty crippling blow, but Asami was right. Enough was enough. Eventually she had to start getting better, right? There’s no way the damage the poison did could be permanent. And if it was… well, she’d have to learn to live with it in a way that didn’t make everyone around her miserable as well. If not to herself, then she at least owed it to her friends and family to put as much effort into healing herself as they all were. Most of all, she owed it to Asami.


	3. Asami

Asami took a deep breath, letting herself fall back against the grass, stareing with sightless eyes at the clear blue sky. In her periphery, Asami was able to make out the giant hulking forms of Future Industry airships as they floated lazily in the sky, each humming a soothing song of well oiled machinery, tied down to giant stakes in the ground littered throughout the field in which she was laying, each as big around as her waist. Airbender Island was supremely peaceful and serene, and Asami couldn’t think of many places that had a more healing atmosphere. However, there were times when Asami ached for the hectic noisiness of the city. She missed the constant buzz of satomobiles in the street and the steady murmur that bespoke of the countless multitudes that called the busy and hectic streets their Home. Most of all, she missed the loud banging and clanging of her workshops and the piercing sound of drills as her mechanics helped piece together prototypes of her company’s latest inventions. It wasn’t the most peaceful environment, but few things put Asami as at ease as she was when surrounded by the chaos of Future Industry’s factory floor.

When Korra was first injured, Asami didn’t hesitate to step in and help as much as she could. The first couple days were easily the most terrifying, and Asami couldn’t help but shudder whenever memories from that time floated unbidden to the surface of her consciousness. Even though the poison had been purged from Korra’s body, there was still the matter of the intense thrashing she had taken while battling Zaheer across the sky. While the imminent danger of the poison had been resolved, Kya, Katara and multitudes of other water healers and worked around the clock to try and restore Korra’s body to a stable state. The bones of her legs were practically in fragments, almost all of her ribs were at the very least fractured and there had been a horrible moment when Korra had begun violently coughing blood, turning an alarming shade of blue before they realized that one of her broken ribs had punctured a lung while she slept.

What was worse, is no one really knew how the healing was going to effect Korra’s broken body. At times, she had slept peacefully through the administrations. Others, Korra’s body would jerk and writhe violently, and Asami had been unable to stop the sobbing that choked her as she had helped the others hold her shoulders down so they could safely finish whatever healing technique they had started.

Everyone had been tense and frantic during that period, but Asami had almost completely fallen apart. She had already lost so much. The thought of losing Korra was more than she could even bear to contemplate. She _needed_ Korra to get better. She _needed_ Korra to wake up and smile and be ok. She _needed_ Korra to come back to her. This need kept her by Korra’s side without break or reprieve. For days, Asami had barely slept, didn’t speak, and only ate because Mako made a point of forcing her to drink the bowls of broth and noodles the air acolytes were constantly bringing around.

Those days were a brief and horrible glimpse of what life would be like without the goodness and vibrance that encompassed all that Korra was to light the way. And Asami refused to let herself dwell on what it would be like to have to adjust to that feeling with any sense of permanence.

When Korra had finally opened her eyes and blearily looked around, she was so weak she wasn’t even able to lift her head. However, Asami had been there, standing in the corner so Korra’s mom and dad could have the spots at their daughter’s bedside. While both Tonraq and Senna had long been asleep, slumped over the side of Korra’s bed, Asami had refused to let sleep claim her. She refused to be unaware and unable to react should Korra finally open her eyes and come back to them. So when Korra’s tired and pained eyes had drifted over and found Asami leaning tiredly against the wall, she was there. She was there with a smile and tears of joy in her eyes. She was there to gently wake Korra’s parents, and when Korra had weakly stretched her fingers in Asami’s direction, she was there to reverently and gently cradle the weak hand in her own.

For a while, it seemed as though everything would -if not exactly return to normal, at the very least- be ok. Korra couldn’t walk - or really move- without a considerable amount of pain. But that was to be expected. Right? Her body had been broken into pieces, and it had been slow going piecing and cementing those pieces back together again. And of course she was going to be affected emotionally. She had come so close to death so many times, it wasn’t a surprise that Korra wasn’t going to immediately go back to her usual happy and peaceful self.

However, Asami had watched in dismay and growing concern as the healers started leaving the healing hut with perplexed expressions and worry lines etched deep into their faces. The bones were healed. The internal bleeding had stopped. All of her organs were functioning normally. Yet Korra remained broken.

No one could even begin to guess what was wrong or how to fix it. Korra had _started_ the healing process a mere shell of her normal self. The trauma of her encounter with Zaheer had very obviously taken its toll, and as the days turned into weeks and Korra was still confined to her chair, quiet apathy had slowly morphed into thinly veiled hostility.

Asami had been there every step of the way. Hadn’t hesitated to take over the room across the hall. Didn’t falter when she informed her Vice President that she was going to take a leave of absence of indeterminate duration and directed him to handle the day to day life of her company to the best of his ability while she helped Korra manage the day to day functioning of hers. And honestly, Asami wouldn’t have it any other way. Even given the Avatar’s horrible mood and stormy countenance, Asami was exactly where she wanted to be. Where she _needed_ to be.

However, Asami was starting suspect that maybe she also _needed_ a break.

 Just a small one.

A sudden gust of wind accompanied by the increasingly loud whirring of a propeller caused Asami to look up, breaking her quiet contemplation. Over the waters of the bay, Asami was able to make out an airship lazily floating towards the island. Asami squinted as she tried to make out the insignia etched along the length of the ship, but the distance was too great. The ship was obviously not a standard Earth Kingdom model. Even from this distance, Asami’s trained ear could tell that the whirring of the engine was too smooth and even to be coming from the sorry excuses for ships that Cabbage Corps. was cranking out.

Asami let her mind float in abject haziness until she was finally able to make out the make and model of the giant mechanism as it effortlessly cut through the sky and when she made the recognition, Asami felt her lips twitch in a smile. After her prolonged stay in Zaofu, Asami would recognize the metal clan insignia anywhere.

The airship completed its journey and touched down almost silently and with a grace that Asami noted with pride. While she had always known her company produced very high quality machinery, it wasn’t until after her brief experience with Cabbage Corps. products that she truly appreciated the fruits of her companies labors.

Asami stood up and stretched, feeling her back pop and crack as the tension eased a little out of her shoulders. The ramp opened and lowered with a satisfying hiss of well oiled pistons and Asami noted with more than a little satisfaction how the heavy piece of metal sunk into the ground without even the hint of a rattle or catch. With growing anticipation, Asami softly grinned as she was finally able to make out a familiar face among the group that emerged from the bowels of the giant piece of metal in front of her.     

Su noticed her immediately, quickly crossing the distance to pull her into a warm hug, a tall and imposing woman close on her heels. Asami was still wrapping her head around the fact that this warm and inviting woman was even related to Chief Beifong, much less a sister. Lin was all business and didn’t encourage or allow any physical contact beyond what was absolutely necessary. Su however, was all hugs and smiles and seemed to communicate just as much with touch and gesture as she did with her words.

“Asami. So good to see you. How are things?” Su’s voice was laced with warmth and compassion, and Asami tightened her arms around the other woman before easing her way back, each grabbing onto the forearms of the other for one final squeeze before letting go.

While she didn’t outright ask, Asami knew Su was asking about Korra. It was no secret that Asami had become a near permanent fixture at the Avatar’s side, and Asami had become used to people coming to her for updates on Korra’s progress instead of asking the water bender themselves. Unlike Korra, Asami would actually answer the questions instead of glare menacingly until the poor soul realized the error of their ways and scampered off into the relative safety of the other side of the island. While Asami didn’t mind being there for Korra in every way she needed, it was unexpectedly exhausting to know that anytime anyone was speaking to her, it was usually to ask for an update on Korra’s progress. It didn’t necessarily make Asami upset. It was just something she learned to tolerate, along with all the other less-than-great aspects of hers and Korra’s current situation.

Asami shrugged, tilting her head while she thought about what words she could use to describe Korra without comparing her to a grumpy toddler.

Asami rested her hand heavily on her hip. “Um… Health wise, she’s about the same”, before  leaning back as she scrunched her nose in contemplation. “She’s having a bit of a hard time with that though”-pausing as she carefully considered her words- “So I wouldn’t get upset or offended if she says or does anything that is... insulting.” There. That was diplomatic enough.

Su nodded in understanding, her eyes glinting in sadness and compassion.

“Well, I figured Lin could use all the extra help she could get, so I brought some reinforcements.” Su turned and waved her hand in a sweeping gesture, her eyes flitting from Asami to the crowd that had coalesced into a semi circle around them. “Asami, this is everyone. Everyone, this is Asami. I think some of you have met.”

Even though Republic City was a separate entity from the Earth Kingdom, President Raiko had swiftly stepped in to help restore the once proud country to a semblance of stability. While the gesture had certainly appeared altruistic and noble, Asami was privy to many contracts and deals Raiko had made with a wide variety of Earth Kingdom based companies and Nobles, and she was sure that Raiko’s goodwill was very heavily laced with a healthy dose of self interest. However, Asami hadn’t bothered herself with details on the situation in weeks. Korra had initially wanted to start attending the war counsels and endless meetings, but the encounters had left Korra even weaker and more upset than usual, so Asami had quietly pleaded with Korra to take a break and allow others to manage the crisis while she focused on healing. While she had initially argued vehemently, Korra had eventually relented, caving to Asami’s smooth and calm persistence that Korra’s focus and attention was best spent elsewhere for the time being. While Korra hadn’t made any marked improvement physically, Asami had seen how removing the added stress of the constant reminders of how messed up the world was had at the very least slightly eased the panicked and haunted look from Korra’s eyes.

The collection of men and women surrounding them nodded in greeting, though the tall woman Asami had noticed earlier stepped closer and put out her hand for a more formal greeting.

“Kuvira,” the woman said in greeting. Asami met the hand and was momentarily shocked by the vice like strength in the other woman’s grip, as was she by the way she had to tilt her head up to meet the steady gaze being offered. Kuvira was really really _tall_ , and the way her metal armor glinted and gleaned in the sunlight made her look like an imposing and majestic beast. Several ideas involving body armor modifications to Lin’s metal bender officer’s uniforms automatically flitted through Asami’s mind and she immediately filed the thoughts away for later.  

“Nice to meet you.” Asami squinted her eyes at the flash of recognition once she was able to get a better look at the woman in front of her. “You look familiar. I think we’ve met?”

Kuvira nodded with a professional smile and lightly squeezed Asami’s hand once more before letting go.

“We spoke a few times while you and your friends were in Zaofu.” Kuvira took a step back and folded her arms behind her back. The way the stance affected her posture almost made it look as though she grew a couple inches right before her eyes. “It was always in passing though, and I know everyone was much more focused on everything else that was going on…” Kuvira’s voice trailed off as she frowned, obviously thinking about the betrayal that had rocked the Zaofu community when Aiwei had turned out be working with the Red Lotus. Kuvira visibly steeled herself before taking a deep breath and turning to Su with a curt nod.

“I’m sure my men are eager to settle in and learn what is it they can do to help-”

Su cut the metal bender off with a dismissive shake of her head. “Don’t you worry about that just yet. I think we all could use some time to get settled in after the journey.” She turned back to Asami with her brow raised in question. “Why don’t you let Asami show you around? If she doesn’t mind of course.” Both Su and Kuvira looked at Asami in expectation, and she froze at the sudden scrutiny, her mind racing. Korra was going to be getting out of her healing session very soon, and for Asami not to be present and waiting for the ok to be given to walk into the healing hut to help Korra recover was, quite frankly, unprecedented. However, the mere thought of having to be in Korra’s uniquely draining bubble of energy was _exhausting_ , and honestly? _Screw her_. Maybe Korra needed to actually experience some repercussions for her nasty behavior and hurtful words.

Asami found herself opening her mouth to speak before she had given it express permission to do so.

“Oh… No. Of course”

Both Kuvira and Su looked at her with varying shades of amusement at Asami’s surprised tone, as though the words coming out of her mouth were an unexpected addition to the little gathering. Even to her own ears, Asami’s tone was unconvincing and hesitant, so before either Kuvira or Su could comment, she took a deep breath and met Kuvira’s eyes.

“I would love to give you a tour.”

Kuvira narrowed her gaze, tilting her head as though deciding whether or not she was going to comment on Asami’s obviously awkward moment before she finally relented, giving a curt nod and turning to the rest of the men in the clearing. They were already busying themselves with unloading the airship of various supplies and spare pieces of armor. It looked as though Kuvira was preparing to address the group when Su gently lay her hand on Kuvira’s elbow to get her attention.

“I can handle this. Go with Asami. It will be good for there to be one other member of the Metal Clan that knows their way around.”

Kuvira looked like she wanted to argue, but eventually relented, turning to Asami with a friendly face and open arms.

“Ok Ms. Sato. Tour away.”

* * *

Asami led Kuvira around the compound explaining the various buildings and the purpose of the multitudes of training areas. Kuvira hmm’ed and ah’ed at appropriate moments, though didn’t say much else. It wasn’t in a cold or awkward way, it was just clear that she had nothing much to say, so didn’t even try.

Kuvira was calm and thoughtful and exuded a kind of peaceful strength that was a balm to Asami’s frayed and tired nerves. It was almost sad, how accustomed she had become to being in the presence of passive aggressive hostility, and experiencing its absence was almost unnerving, for it took a while for Asami to stop reflexively preparing for a barb or insult.

The more they walked, Asami felt the tension slowly easing out of her cramped shoulders and back, and found herself talking less and less about the compound and more about the city as a whole.

Without realizing it, she had launched into a story about her experiences going to school in Ba-Sing-Se, and the two of them were laughing easily. The sound felt unnatural in her throat. When was the last time she had just sat with someone trading stories and laughed?

A flash of blue, and a blinding smile tossed over a sculpted and toned shoulder raced through Asami’s mind. The ghostly memory felt like a punch to Asami’s gut, and she sucked in a breath against the ache.

Kuvira looked up from where her hands had been idly twisting a piece of grass and tilted her head at Asami in concern. Asami cleared her throat and smiled shakily, tucking her hair behind her ear before leaning back into the grass. Asami had concluded the tour by leading them back to the pond she had originally been visiting before she heard the airship’s arrival and they were both lounging lazily in the tall grass.

Kuvira didn’t try and fill the silence and her look of concern was starting to make Asami uncomfortable. Heaving a big breath, Asami let herself fall back into the grass and looked listlessly up at the clouds.

It was a while before either of them spoke again.

“So how are you doing?”

Asami was used to the question. People asked her all the time. What she _wasn’t_ used to was the sharp stab of anxiety that lanced through her chest and down her arms. She knew what people wanted to hear. What they _expected_ to hear. She’s doing fine. She’s great. She’s able to be there for Korra and that’s all she wants right now. Her company is doing fine. No, she doesn’t miss the city… The ache in her chest almost seemed to double, and Asami forced herself to take a deep and steadying breath, draping her forearm across her forehead.

“Everything is ok. Korra is having a really hard time, and it’s definitely affecting her mood. But she’ll get better eventually.”

Kuvira tilted her head, and frowned. The ache in her chest flared again, and Asami shifted her arm so that it covered her eyes. For some reason, Kuvira looking at her was… too much. Too much of what, Asami wasn’t really sure.

“It’s obvious you care about her very much.”

The onslaught of memories made the ache impossibly worse, but Asami couldn’t help but smile.  

She and Korra hadn’t always been ‘friends’. Rivals, acquaintances, allies, sure. But not friends. That hadn’t started until after Korra’s fight with Unalaq. The messiness of their love triangle with Mako was a thing of the past and they had wordlessly and simultaneously decided to let bygones be bygones and actually try to get to know each other.

Getting to know Korra had been… amazing. _Korra_ was amazing. She was kind and sweet and extremely funny, and Asami had few greater joys than seeing Korra outright laugh, and she had had ample opportunity when it had just been the two of them traipsing across the desert when they had been separated from the rest of their group. Honestly, Asami couldn’t recall a time when she had felt more at peace or more fulfilled and happy then when she and Korra had spent that time together. And it was in the really small moments; When Korra would walk over and sit behind Asami, ramping up her core temperature with fire bending to ease Asami’s violent shivering in the cold desert air; When Asami had been trying to explain to Korra how to move her fingers when welding their sand sail together (once her -predictably unreliable- Cabbage Corps. Acetylene torch had nearly blown up) and Korra had nearly been in tears with frustration until Asami had gently covered Korra’s hands with her own and guided her through the correct motions; The moment when Asami just _knew_ Korra was trying to make her scream when steering the sand sail around increasingly steep hills and valleys. The rest of the crew certainly hadn’t liked that, but Asami had laughed and shrieked, her eyes streaming with joy.

Watching over Korra during her most vulnerable moments when she was meditating into the spirit world.

Asami felt a gentle nudge at her side and became acutely aware of both the fact that her smile was bordering on disgustingly dopey, and that it officially been a really long time since Kuvira had asked her the question.

Asami fought the smile off her face and shrugged.  “She’s my best friend”

And if she was maybe slightly aware that somewhere between Zaofu, and their second visit to the Misty Palms Oasis that she possibly could have a teeny tiny bit of a maybe crush on the Avatar? That wasn’t really anyone’s business other than her own.

Plus, who _wouldn’t_ have a crush on the Avatar? She was beautiful and honestly one of the most caring and compassionate people she had ever met. Not many people would put their life in danger for their friends, and Asami knew that Korra would gladly sacrifice hers if it meant sparing the life of those she loved.

“You didn’t answer my question though,”  Kuvira said, interrupting Asami’s thoughts.

“Huh?”

“I asked you how _you_ are doing. Not the Avatar. Thank you for the update though.”

Asami frowned, moving her arm to squint up at the metal clad woman above her. Kuvira wasn’t quite smiling, but there was an edge to the curve of her lips that Asami found mildly irritating. It almost looked like she was in on some secret, and was amused and… she didn’t like it. She leveraged herself back upright, absently pulling up a few blades of grass to twist between her fingers.

“What do you mean?”

Even though she was staring intently at her hands, Asami could tell that Kuvira was still looking at her. That almost smile melted away, and the resulting stare made Asami feel striped bare. She would take being outright laughed at over the penetrating gaze with which she now found herself being leveled. Asami hunched her shoulders down a little, and focused more intently on the braid she was twisting with her fingers. The ache in her chest had resurfaced with a vengeance and it was starting to get difficult to breathe.

Thankfully, Kuvira released Asami from her hold. Asami tried to be discreet with the way she released her pent up breath, but she wasn’t sure Kuvira didn’t catch it anyways. When Kuvira didn’t elaborate, Asami chanced a glance up out of the corner of her eye. Kuvira was staring across the pond with sightless eyes, her face void of all expression. It seemed as though she was aware that Asami had looked however, for immediately she started to speak.

“It is hard, sometimes, in the face of experiences such as the Avatar’s, to remember that there are more than just the one victim feeling it’s pain.”

Asami’s stomach bottomed out and the pain in her chest flared with such intensity she couldn’t help but suck in another breath, reaching up with one hand to massage at the ache.

It was a while before she trusted her voice to speak.

“I’m doing ok.  I just… I just want her to get better”. Asami did her best to not wince at how small she sounded just then, and she was more grateful that she cared to admit that Kuvira didn’t look over.

Maybe it was because of her fight with Korra that morning, but Asami suddenly felt overwhelmingly… raw. The ache in her chest was impossibly building, and Asami flexed and twisted her fingers against their sudden tingling. Thinking about the fight and Korra’s broken state after allowing herself to bask in the memories of when she had been at her strongest and they had been at their closest was disorienting and startlingly painful, and Asami grappled with the sudden feeling that she wanted to be somewhere... _anywhere_ else right then. Because if she didn’t get up and _do_ something, or go somewhere, she was going to-

“It’s hard” Asami blurt out, the sound escaping her throat in a sudden burst, surprising herself in its intensity. She honestly hadn’t meant to say anything, but now that she had, it was almost like flood gates had been opened and there was no stemming the resulting flow.

“It’s _hard_. Seeing her like this. Being like this. Being this person for her.” -Asami felt her nose start to itch and the corner of her eyes start to burn and dropped her braided grass to press the heels of her hands into her eyes- “Korra was so strong. She was the strongest person I knew. In every way. And now she’s-” her breath catches mortifyingly on the edge of a sob, and Asami huffed in aggravation against the sudden show of emotion in front of this complete stranger. She wiped violently at her eyes, and took a deep steadying breath before letting herself slump back against her hands in the grass.

 “It’s just hard” Asami finished lamely.

Kuvira didn’t immediately respond. She tilted her head in Asami’s direction, and she could feel the other woman’s eyes on her, but she didn’t say anything for a long time.

When she did, her tone was hushed and gentle, as though Asami were a cornered and frightened animal and she didn’t want her to bolt.

“Back in Zaofu, we don’t have hospitals. Did you know that?”

Asami frowned at the sudden change in subject, fighting the urge to roll her eyes at the irrational irritation she felt. When it became clear that Kuvira was waiting for a response before continuing, Asami shook her head.

“When someone gets sick in Zaofu, we have doctors go and do home visits. The thought process being that it’s easier for a healthy doctor to go to the patient than it is for a sick patient to go somewhere else.”

 Asami nodded again. “That makes sense” 

“But when someone is _really_ sick, or is in the process of dying, it’s not just the doctors that go to the patient’s house. We also have a Care Worker visit, or in some cases move in with the sick person as well.”

Asami lifted her head to look over, beginning to guess where this conversation was going.

“When organizing the systems in which the sick and dying where cared for, Su made sure that it was never just _one_ person that was responsible. She said she saw during her time traveling around the earth kingdom what that can do to someone’s spirit. So the Care Worker visits the house. Sometimes the Care Worker is the person taking care of the sick person alongside the doctor and the person’s family. Sometimes the Care Worker’s job is to make sure the sick person’s main caretaker is taking care of themselves.

 Asami?”

Asami did her best to ignore the pointed look in her direction by picking up the braid of grass she had previous dropped and resumed twisting it between her fingers.

“Hmm?”

Asami continued to study her fingers, and couldn’t help but jump when a gloved hand entered her field of vision and gently grasped her fingers in a loose hold. Asami whipped her head up and met the gaze of the metal bender next to her.

“When was the last time you left the island?”

Asami flinched at the open concern and tried to pull her fingers away, but Kuvira’s loose hold tightened and refused to let her go.

“I… It…” Asami’s mouth worked as she tried to think back far enough to answer the question, while simultaneously trying to think of a way to get out of this suddenly extremely uncomfortable conversation altogether.

“I’m ok though. I _want_ to be here. If I was anywhere else, i’d just be-”

“Just answer the question Asami. When was the last time you weren’t by the Avatar’s side?”

Realizing Kuvira wasn’t going to let Asami go - literally and figuratively- Asami released her pent up breath in a rush, her shoulders slumping with the force of her capitulation.

“Not since before she was hurt”

Kuvira held Asami’s gaze a moment longer, before finally letting her go. Asami tucked her released fingers into a fist, absently pulling her arm into her chest. The ache was back, and she was starting to get a headache. Overall, Asami felt like an exposed nerve, and more than anything, in that moment, Asami wanted to be safe back in her bedroom and alone. Kuvira seemed to sense that she had pushed Asami further than comfortable, for she didn’t pry or press further. The silence didn’t feel quite as loaded as it had before. Asami was grateful.

A bell rang softly in the distance and both of them jumped lightly at the sound. Asami squinted up at the sun and was startled when she realized how low it now hung in the sky. Kuvira seemed to come to the same realization for she immediately began leveraging herself to her feet, stretching with her arms high in the air until Asami was able to hear a soft pop.

Asami slowly followed suit, suddenly uncomfortable as she didn’t really know how to bring their interlude together to an end. Which was weird. She was Asami Sato. Heir to future industries. Youngest CEO in Republic City history. She had navigated her way through much more uncomfortable encounters than a peaceful stroll through the air temple gardens with a metal bender.

Just when Asami was opening her mouth to politely disengage from the moment, Kuvira spoke.

 “I’ve never been to Republic City before.”

“...What?” Her father would be ashamed if he could see what an inarticulate mess Asami was being in that moment.

“I grew up in a small village in the earth kingdom. Then I moved to Zaofu. I haven't really traveled much. But I’ve heard Republic City is one of the most incredible cities in the world.”

Struggling to wrangle her thoughts and emotions into check, Asami cleared her throat and nodded, doing her best to smile through the lingering ache in her chest and heavy cloud of her thoughts.

“It… It is. You should definitely make your way over if you have the chance before going back to Zaofu.”

Kuvira nodded with a smile. “I definitely intend to. And if you’re willing, i’d love for you to be my tour guide. If you can make a place of meditation this interesting and exciting, i’m very keen on seeing what you can do for a place like Republic City.”

Kuvira’s tone was light and joking, but Asami immediately narrowed her eyes in suspicion. It was very obvious what Kuvira was doing and Asami felt a minor tingle of irritation. Asami didn’t care how good Kuvira’s intentions might have been. If there was one thing she detested, it was being manipulated. She was opening her mouth to decline out of principal alone, when Kuvira cut her off.

“You deserve some time to yourself. No one will think less of you if you take a day off. If it’s not with me in the city, that’s fine. But do _something_ for yourself.” Kuvira reached out and placed a gentle hand on Asami’s arm, gripping her just above the elbow and dipping her head to try and meet Asami’s eyes. Once Asami’s emerald eyes met their darker counterpart, Kuvira softened her gaze, dragging her hand up Asami’s arm until it was resting loosely on her shoulder. “You need it.”

 Kuvira’s last sentence was delivered so softly and gently, Asami felt her eyes start to burn again and it took all her self control to not let the tears spill over. That more than anything was what caused her to make up her mind.

Kuvira was right. She needed some time away. Her emotions were all over the place, and being in the constant presence of Korra right now wasn’t doing anyone any good. She had been right in her earlier musings. She needed a break.

The concern and care being shared through both look and touch was too much, so Asami took a step back, clearing her throat in the process. Kuvira, however didn’t look offended. She merely folded her arms lightly behind her back and broadened her stance, looking every bit like a soldier awaiting orders.

“OK. I’d… yeah. Ok”

 Kuvira brightened visibly at Asami’s words, holding her arm out for her to take and nodding in the general direction of the main dining area. The bell earlier had been indicating that food had been laid out for lunch, and Asami was momentarily surprised when it became clear that Kuvira had indeed been attentively listening as Asami had droned on and on during their tour.

Asami smiled at the gesture, but began walking without taking the arm. She didn’t really trust herself at that moment to be able to handle more physical touch than strictly necessary, and she had already embarrassed herself enough this afternoon. Kuvira didn’t take offense and used her long legs to easily catch up.

“Tomorrow then?” Kuvira inquired, raising her eyebrows with the question.

Asami fought through a wave of trepidation at the question, already semi-regretting agreeing in the first place. As much as it was difficult being around Korra while she was behaving… the way she was behaving, Korra was still Asami’s best friend. She still wanted to be there for her. Was she really ready to walk away for one full day? Was that really ok? Would Korra understand?

That last thought caused Asami’s breath to catch in her throat. Because thinking about Korra was like thinking about two different people. Korra from _before_ , and the brok-... Korra from now.

 At Asami’s hesitance, Kuvira elaborated. “Su is giving us tomorrow to get settled in. The day after tomorrow, we plan on integrating Zaofu troops into the Republic City police force, and I will be engaged in talks with the remaining generals of the earth kingdom armies that didn’t already defect. There are going to be very long days ahead of me, and I don’t know when I’ll-”

“Yes. Tomorrow. Tomorrow is...Tomorrow is fine” Asami hastily cut in. Her internal struggle over whether or not Korra would understand was moot. A day off wasn’t for Korra. It was so Asami could get a much needed breath of fresh air and continue doing… whatever it is she was doing. Honestly, the sooner the better.

Kuvira didn’t respond, but Asami could see the way her lips quirked in that almost-smile, and her eyes were definitely several shades lighter.

“Tomorrow.” Kuvira repeated, letting her pleasure at the prospect and Asami’s decision color her tone.

It was decided. Asami was going to be spending a full day away from Korra. It was something she needed. She _knows_ its something she needed. Then why did she feel so guilty?


	4. Korra

Healing. Sessions. SUCKED. There was really no other way to look at it. It didn’t matter what mindset you had going into them. Being positive and happy when getting wheeled into those stupid horrible rooms wouldn’t change the fact that Korra would be a sweating, shaking mess of a person coming out of them. 

And that’s exactly what she was in that moment. Asami had -of course- been correct, and her empty stomach was actively working against her as it cramped and twisted in on itself. The worst part was that it wasn’t Asami’s cool fingers and reassuring words gently cooing at her as she shook and shivered her ways through the lingering effects. Korra loved her mom. So much. But that was not who she wanted by her side at the moment. Asami’s absence was painfully sharp like a newly amputated limb. 

The healing session was brutal. They always were. Being fussed over by a veritable army of water benders wasn’t the hard part. Or the way the healers would bend and twist her limbs as they worked the atrophied muscles out of their cramped positions, stiff from prolonged hours of disuse. Sure, that part was uncomfortable, but it wasn’t bad. Even the useless encouragement she received to “just move a toe. Just one toe. You can do it Korra” - _ obviously she couldn’t, dumbass, or she would have a long time ago _ \- while frustrating, wasn’t the end of the world. It sucked, but it wasn’t what made Korra dread those sessions with a fervency that caused her to break out in a sweat and bring a slight tremble to her hands. 

The real terror occurred when the healers would direct their glowing waters around Korra’s forearms or legs; when she could feel the slick coolness of the water ghosting along her skin and gently invading her pores. Or when they would work her wrists and ankles into the straps of the machine that was supposed to help her move, but instead paralyzed her with fear as they reminded her of harsh pinch and bite of platinum chains. Or when Tenzin or another of the other airbenders in training would ‘help’ her in and out of her chair with a gentle gust of wind at the back of her neck or as a sure pressure at the base of her spine. When any of  _ that _ happened -and it did. Every time- she would be sucked into a memory so intense she long ago stopped trying to find signs that it wasn’t real. The pain and fear she had felt while battling the Avatar state would consume her and in those moments, she was forced to relive every fall, hit and blow she had received during the fight that had almost cost her  _ everything _ . 

After several weeks of this torture, she had told Katara. She hated the way Tenzin and the other healers were looking at her and didn’t want to add to their list of ways in which she was broken. She didn’t tell Asami because… Asami was doing enough. Korra wasn’t blind. She could see how much her personal suffering was getting to her friend. The light in her eyes had long ago started to dim, and as much as she tried to hide it, it was obvious how difficult it was for her to see Korra in pain. Asami didn’t need to know that the healing sessions were far more than just physically painful. Korra would gladly take the nausea and the sharp ache and stretch of her muscles over what was going on in her mind. And that was something Asami didn’t need to know. 

Katara said she suspected Korra was holding onto the experience, unable to let it go. 

_ Just let it go. Let go. _

How the fuck do you let something like this go? 

The fight with Zaheer had been the most terrifying experience of her life. She hadn’t been connected to her Avatar spirit for all that long before it had been severed, but she strongly suspected that it had been the most terrifying experience of  _ all _ of her lives. And that was  _ really _ saying something. All of the struggles and foes she had overcome since she came to Republic City, while harrowing, paled in comparison. Amon had wanted her bending, but Korra fought through it, ultimately uniting her with her Avatar Spirit in way she had previously been unable. Unalaq had wanted Korra’s spirit, but through the journey she was able to find and center herself resulting in more inner peace and serenity that she had thought herself capable. Sure, she still was hot headed and maybe a little bit reactive, but nowhere near where she was before she learned the lessons of betrayal and deceit at the hands of her uncle. 

But Zaheer? Zaheer wanted to  _ destroy _ her. Not just her body. Not just her mind and spirit. But everything both she as an individual and as the Avatar stood for. And he almost did it. In her previous fights, she had succeeded based on her ability to come to peace with who and what she was. With Zaheer, her survival had depended solely on her ability to  _ fight _ who and what she was. All her life, she was taught to embrace and embody the Avatar spirit in all her actions. In that fight… in that moment, her survival depended entirely on her ability to fight it. 

How do you come back from suffering that kind of schism? How do you  _ let go _ of that?

The healing that day had been no different. Memory after memory bogged her down and choked her spirit. Her muscled ached, her head hurt and her heart was thumping lethargically around her chest as though it had given up and was deciding whether or not just give out and just... _ stop _ . She suspected she should be a little more alarmed at the prospect than she was. While the thought was accompanied by a great deal of shame, she was almost relieved at the prospect. She was tired of this. Maybe this was her punishment for severing the long line of Avatar spirits that stretched back to the beginning of time. Maybe this was her penitence for ending a dynasty that had been considered the pillar of civilization for... _ forever _ . 

Maybe she deserved this. 

Korra heaved one final time, fighting down a shiver as the fear that had been flooding through her body slowly oozed and slipped its way out of her spine. Senna continued to gently run her hand up and down the length of Korra’s back until Tenzin finally broke away from the cluster of healers in the corner. She didn’t need to look up to be able to tell that Senna was eyeing the incoming airbender with hopeful eyes, or to know that Tenzin was subtly shaking his head, indicating that  _ no, there weren’t any improvements worthy of note. But don’t worry. Tomorrow is a new day _ . 

_ Fuck tomorrow _ . 

Senna gently squeezed Korra’s shoulder once more before meeting Tenzin in the corner, only for them to speak to each other in hushed tones. Korra did her best to ignore the concerned and pitying looks thrown her way as one of the air acolytes helped ease her into her chair. Before the kindly woman walked away, she discreetly handed Korra a small rag, smiling in morose encouragement as she mimed wiping her face. Korra hastily dragged the rag under eyes and across her face, eager to wipe away the last vestiges of the tears that seemed to permanently stain her cheeks. 

Finally, Tenzin hugged her mother and walked over, the smile on his face far too stiff and static to be remotely close to authentic. 

“You did well. The healers said-”

“Tenzin” Korra breathed out on a sigh. It wasn’t said with anger or frustration. If anything, she just sounded exhausted. She was exhausted. Tenzin flinched anyways. 

“Yes Korra?”   
“Can you… I just… Not today. OK?”

Korra wasn’t really sure what she was asking for. She didn’t know exactly what it was she was asking Tenzin not to do. She knew she was basically validating every thing Asami had accused her of that morning. She knew that she was so deep in her hopelessness that it was actually difficult to breath. But she didn’t really care in that moment. She wasn’t upset. She wasn’t angry. She was just tired, and false hopes and platitudes being given from a place of forced lightness and levity was only making her feel worse. 

She was  _ tired. _

Maybe Tenzin understood, because his face softened as he nodded. For once, it wasn’t pity Korra could see on his face. It was only the sadness and despair she knew was probably reflected off her own. She was so tired.

Tenzin was silent through most of the trek back to Korra’s room, and she was grateful. However when he did speak, she was relieved it wasn’t some piece of useless wisdom that sounded more like it belonged on the colorful hand drawn posters she knew Asami’s managerial staff liked to hang throughout the smaller office spaces. 

“Su arrived today,” Tenzin said. His tone was almost comically conversarial. Korra took a deep breath to try and loosen the tightness that hadn’t quite eased in her chest. 

“Oh. That’s nice,” Korra rasped out.

Korra felt more than heard Tenzin’s hesitation. It was clear he had been expecting to be ignored. 

Adding insult to injury, the fight with Asami surfaced in her mind and Korra suddenly wanted nothing more than to just earthbend herself into an impenetrable cocoon to be left alone in her misery. Of course Tenzin had been expecting to be ignored. She had been ignoring everyone. Everyone except Asami. No. Asami she had yelled at. Which was why she wasn’t here. 

As if summoned, Korra heard the soft tinkling of a familiar laugh. Tenzin was pushing Korra past one of the elevated meditation gardens that overlooked the rest of the island and when she looked down, Korra saw Asami meandering through one of the gardens below. 

She wasn’t alone. 

Korra reached back and placed a hand on Tenzins’ where it lay on the handle of her chair. He slowed to a stop at her touch.    


“Yes?”

“Can I just- stay here for a while?” Korra asked, clearing her throat halfway through to clear her voice of the hoarseness she hadn’t yet bothered to fix. 

“Are you sure you don’t want to just go back to your room to rest?” Tenzin asked, concern heavily etched in the lines of his face.

Korra shook her head. “I just want to be outside for a little”. Tenzin was eying her as though she were an unpredictable and wild animal, and Korra realized he was probably waiting for an insult or barb. While it was true she felt a slight itch to follow through, she was more concerned with getting Tenzin to go away so she could focus more intently on the scene below her. Who  _ was _ that? 

“Please?”

Tenzin hesitated for half a second longer before nodding. 

“Of course, Korra. Whatever you need. I guess i’ll… come back later?”

Korra nodded absently, already painfully leveraging herself to sit more upright in her chair, the better to see over hedge in front of her partially blocking her view.

Asami and her companion were skirting the edges of a pond, and while Korra could just make out the sound of their voices, she was too far away for her to be able to hear anything specific that was being said. She certainly wasn’t able to recognize who the second person was. It was a woman, judging by the cut of her armor and length of her air. A very tall woman. Metal Clan. 

Korra was only aware that Tenzin had left when she turned to ask for him to roll her closer to the edge of the walkway and away from the bushes blocking her view. With a huff of frustration, Korra shakily rolled the wheels of her chair, maneuvering herself over to a nearby gap in the brush, tracking Asami and this mystery woman as they made their way to the edge of the pond and dropped down into the tall grass. 

Even from this distance, it was obvious that Asami was more relaxed than Korra had seen her in a long time. The sunlight glinted off her raven hair, and even in her dark clothing, seemed to emanate light and beauty.

Korra recalled with chagrin how jealous she had once been of the enigmatic heiress. Asami had always made Korra feel so small and ungainly when compared to the graceful and stunningly beautiful older woman. Asami was just…  _ perfect _ . While this had once bothered her to no end (how on earth had she ever managed to compete with  _ that _ when vying for Mako’s attention?! And just how much of an idiot was Mako to actually think Korra could ever compare?), now she just counted herself lucky that for some strange reason, Asami viewed Korra as a friend. Asami viewed Korra the  _ girl _ -not just her status as the Avatar- someone worthy of spending time with. And sure, she felt that way with Mako and Bolin as well, but… it was different. The fact that she was the Avatar factored into her relationships with both the bender brothers. It was just part of their dynamic. It wasn’t necessarily a bad thing, but whether it was the result of Mako awkwardly referring to her as ‘Avatar’ whenever he felt particularly uncomfortable, or Bolin’s enthusiastic referral to the four of them as ‘Team Avatar’, she always felt particularly aware of her title and status with her friends. Asami was different. Maybe it was because Asami was used to being surrounded by important people, or subconsciously sympathized with the scrutiny as the heiress and now CEO of one of the most prolific and successful companies of their generation; Asami never made her feel like she was more than just...Korra. When she was with Asami, she was just a water bender girl from a small southern water tribe and it felt  _ good _ .  

There were moments when it had been just the two of them stranded alone in the desert, usually just after she had managed to make Asami laugh in way she rarely did when with their other friends, that Korra couldn’t believe how lucky she was. Her friendship with Asami was easily the most meaningful and most important in her life. Instead of being intimidated and jealous of Asami’s wonderful personality, Korra felt genuinely inspired by it. While she felt largely undeserving of having someone so amazing as such a devoted friend, it made her constantly want to better herself. Asami made her want to be a better person, and not just so she could better fulfill her duties as the Avatar. She just felt...inspired. It was a way no one had ever made her feel. 

Korra’s attention snapped back to the scene in front of her with a jarring crash as the metal bender reached out and laid a gentle hand on Asami’s arm.  _ OK. For real. Who what this woman? Since when was Asami all chummy with the metal clan? How long had this been going on? What was ‘this’ anyways?  _

When the hand at Asami’s elbow smoothly slid up to her shoulder, Korra felt the wind rush out of her lungs, the resulting dizziness both unexpected and disorienting. Whatever  _ this _ was, it sure looked pretty friendly.

Korra watched with rapt attention, waiting with bated breath for Asami to shrug the other woman’s hand off, or to walk away or to punch her in the face… something… anything to indicate that the moment the two were sharing wasn’t nearly as intimate as it appeared. The moment didn’t come, and Korra felt both anger, frustration and a confusing well of shame as she violently turned her chair so she was no longer confronted with the site in front of her. 

Distantly, she knew she was being ridiculous. Korra was well aware that it really shouldn’t bother her to see Asami walking through the garden with another woman basically  _ manhandling _ her. It really was none of her business. And it probably wasn’t that big of a deal anyways. Asami was one of the most friendly and easygoing people Korra had ever met, and she was always, constantly networking. This was probably just some contact she had made while in the metal city. 

Still…

Korra’s stomach was still twisting in discomfort as she reached her shaking arms down and experimentally started to wheel herself away. She didn’t want to wait for Tenzin to return. All she wanted was to return to the safety of her room. Her skin felt tight, and her mind was buzzing uncomfortably and she suspected that all the events of the day were really catching up to her. She needed to get away. Right now.

* * *

 

Korra was breathless and shaking by the time she reached the door to her room. Just as she was allowing herself a moment of pride at having made it there all by herself -dear spirits, how far she had fallen- when she looked up and groaned in dismay. Tenzin had moved Korra to one of the older buildings with sturdier walls and actual wooden doors instead of the shoji screens that were used in most of the living quarters. The door was made of heavy oak, and there was no way she was going to be able to open it, hold the door open and wheel herself through all by herself. The reality of her complete helplessness descended in a crippling wave, and Korra alarmingly found herself fighting back a burning in her nose and eyes at the tears that were trying to edge their way to the surface. Taking a deep breath through her nose and wiping her palms furiously at her face, Korra was readying herself to wheel herself back to a more occupied area when a soft and familiar voice called out in surprise, making Korra jump and twist painfully in her chair. 

“Korra?”

“Oh. Hey, Asami”

“What are you doing?” Asami asked, looking up and down the hallway in confusion. For half a second, Korra felt her stomach twist in apprehension when she mistakenly thought Asami was looking out for her metal bender friend, before “How did you… Where’s Tenzin?” 

The apprehension immediately morphed into irritation when it became clear that Asami assumed that there was no way she had rolled herself to her room on her own. And sure, Korra was aware that it wasn’t fair for her to be irritated. But her stomach was still twisting from the fight, and the healing session, and seeing Asami being manhandled by a strange metal bender during a time when she was usually helping Korra recover. However, Asami seemed completely oblivious. If anything, she just looked concerned and a little indignant that Korra had been left alone. The observation cooled the edges of storm cloud rolling around Korra’s chest, and she cleared her throat before looking away. 

“He’s… I just…” Korra struggled with her words. Asami was walking slowly closer and Korra became hyper aware of the proximity. “I wanted to do it by myself”, Korra finished lamely as Asami kneeled in front of her chair, her hand resting easily on Korra’s arm. 

Asami tilted her head and blinked, confusion painting her features. Korra would have been more irritated at how incredulous Asami appeared at the prospect of the mighty Avatar completing this simple task on her own, but Asami’s long fingers were gently rubbing at the soft skin at Korra’s wrist and it was like some weird superpower Asami seemed to possess where this little action required like, 90% of Korra’s focus and attention. It was something she had noticed when they co-built a sand sail to try and make their way back to the Misty Palms Oasis. It was annoying. 

The fingers at Korra wrist stilled as Asami sat further back on her heels. “You… You got here by yourself?” Asami asked, her words slow and deliberate. 

Ok. This was irritating. Of course she got there by herself. He was injured, not dead. Her arms worked just fine(ish). Was it really that unbelievable and shocking that she could accomplish something like this on her own?

Korra opened her mouth, the frustration and irritation so thick and heavy, she could  _ taste _ it on her tongue. The fingers at her wrist twitched and Korra snapped her eyes to Asami’s face. There was a tightness in the corner of her eyes, and her lips were pressed so tightly together, they were almost white. She looked like she was… bracing herself. 

Korra immediately deflated, self-loathing and horror filling her chest with renewed force. Not even half a day later, and Korra had been already ready to snap and yell again. She was definitely further gone than she had originally thought. 

Doing her best to plaster a smile on her face, Korra took a deep breath. 

“Uh… Yeah. Guess the healing is working after all.”

Korra was wholly unprepared for the smile that lit Asami’s face, or the way she rushed forward and enclosed Korra in a warm embrace, her hair tickling Korra’s nose and her cheek pressed softly against her own. The smell of Asami’s hair and perfume seemed to seep into Korra’s pores, and she couldn’t suppress the sudden need to breathe as deeply as she could. 

Though the hug only lasted a moment, Korra felt every touch with startling clarity; Asami’s hand on her leg to steady herself as she bent down; her other hand’s fingers pressed lightly into the sensitive spot along the ridge of her spine; a soft breath as it caressed its way past Korra’s ear and down the column of her throat. Korra’s whole body stiffened, but thankfully Asami didn’t seem to notice and finally,  _ finally _ pulled away, reaching up to cup Korra’s cheek in her palm.

“This is wonderful. I’m very proud of you.”

There was an itch at the base of Korra skull, urging and goading her to do something. The longer she remained motionless, Asami’s soft hand at her cheek, staring into moss green eyes that were shining with something Korra couldn’t name, the itch spread to her neck and shoulders and made her fingers twitch. Her mind started to get increasingly fuzzy and abruptly, Korra realized she was holding her breath. 

The edges of her vision were starting to blur when she finally let her lungs exhale in a rush and managed to direct her arms to the wheels of her chair, backing herself away and turning towards the door. Korra smiled shakily at Asami’s look of concern while gesturing to her closed door. 

“Um… Do you think you can… I mean, I can’t quite figure out how I’m going to…”

Korra gulped in a deep breath as inconspicuously as she could as Asami leveraged herself to her feet, clearing her throat as she went. 

“Of course”, Asami quipped, reaching over Korra’s shoulder to swing the door open. Her voice however, sounded a little…  _ strange _ . 

While holding the door open with one arm, Korra felt more than saw Asami slip behind her chair, the tingling starting back up at the base of her spine as the smell of Asami’s hair brushed past her nose and she felt a slight pressure behind her shoulders as Asami used her hip to push Korra forward. 

Korra hastily reached down and gripped the wheels of her chair, propelling herself forward those last few feet. Asami made a small sound of surprise and protest, but Korra waved her off.  

“It’s okay. I can handle it.”

Korra heard the soft click of Asami’s boots as she followed her into the room. She wheeled herself over to the edge of her bed before kind of slumping back into her chair, twisting her hands together and studiously keeping her eyes trained on her lap. She could  _ feel _ Asami’s eyes on her, and for some reason Korra didn’t quite have it in her to meet them. Her skin felt stretched tight across her body again, and she had a moment of panic when she realized she didn’t feel like she was in complete control off the muscles of her face. There was just too much going on in her mind. She was still feeling hurt that Asami had been spending time with a stranger instead of helping her when she came out of the healing session, but she was also ashamed at her overall neediness and dependence. She was battling the vestiges of irritation at having been yelled at, but knew full well that she had deserved it. She wanted more than anything to clear that air and apologize, but was scared to raise her head and meet the eyes of her best friend because she felt so raw and vulnerable she had no idea what Asami would be able to see. She didn’t even know what was there for Asami to see. 

In that moment, she was more uncomfortable than she could ever recall being in another person’s presence, and she both wanted Asami to go away and never leave and it was confusing and weird and Korra desperately wanted it to go away so she could just go back to how it had been before. 

She felt more than saw Asami lower herself onto Korra’s bed and realized she must be really close because the fine hairs framing her face fluttered in the breeze of the deep breath that Asami suddenly released. 

“You’re still upset with me.”

Korra wasn’t sure what she was expecting, but the hurt tone in Asami’s voice caused her to whip her head up so quickly, the muscles in her neck pinched. Asami looked sad and a little hurt, but her mouth was fixed in a grim line as she stared down at her clasped hands. 

“Look Korra… I know I wa-”

“No.” Korra interrupted, reaching out on instinct to touch Asami’s knee. She knew the second her fingers connected that it was probably a mistake, for the connection between them flared in the small space between them and Korra’s fingers started to tingle a little where she felt strong muscles shifting under the rough fabric of Asami’s trousers. Asami stilled at the touch, curling both her hands into fists and lowering them to the bed. Korra felt the itch to pull her hand away but forced herself to keep it there, waiting patiently for Asami to raise her face and meet her eyes. When she finally did, Korra almost sucked in a breath at how that seemed to ramp up the intensity of the moment even more. It was a struggle to get the words out of her throat, not because she didn’t want to say them and more because her throat felt almost locked tight with the power of the other woman’s gaze.

So  _ this _ was new.

“I’m… I’m sorry” 

“What?” Asami breathed out.

“I..You were right. I’ve been horrible. I’ve been feeling hopeless and all I want is to just feel...better. But that’s not an excuse to take it out on everyone around me. Especially you.”

Asami sucked in a breath and dropped her eyes, giving Korra the chance to take a deep breath. 

“I shouldn’t have yelled at you”, Asami mumbled out. “I don’t regret what I said, but I shouldn’t have yelled.”

Korra laughed, sitting back in her chair and pulling her hand free of Asami’s knee. Asami shifted a little on the bed, tucking one leg under her and scooting further back on the bed, widening the space between them. Unless Korra was mistaken, it seemed that Asami seemed to need the distance as well. Regardless, she was grateful. The distance certainly made it much easier to breathe. 

“Honestly, I don’t think you would have gotten through any other way. I think I needed it.  I know I can be...” Korra squinted her eyes, struggling to come up with the right word. 

“Stubborn as a bull-turtle?”

Korra scoffed in mock indignation and rolled her eyes, but the corner of Asami’s mouth lifted in the hint of a grin. 

For a moment, they just looked at each other. Asami was losing her fight with the smile pulling at the corners of her mouth, and Korra couldn’t help but watch in wonder as the expression finally took hold. It  _ really  _ wasn’t fair how pretty Asami was. 

“Thank you”, Asami finally said, lowering her eyes back to her fingers where they were twisting in her lap. “For the apology”. 

Korra just shrugged, lowering her own to where she was absently picking at one of her cuticles. Since when had things felt so tense and loaded between them? What was wrong with her? This was her best friend. 

“So… I-” Korra absently reached up to scratch at the back of her neck, “...when I was on my way back-”, studiously avoiding looking at Asami’s face as she carefully tried to pick her words. Her brain was being spectacularly unhelpful however, so in the end, she growled softly under her breath as she let her arms fall lifelessly back into her lap. “So who was that? The bender.” Korra lightly cleared her throat, picking at a spot on her wrist again as an excuse to not acknowledge the way Asami’s smile had dropped as her eyes narrowed in focus. “The metal bender?” Korra helpfully supplied when Asami remained silent. 

“Oh. That was captain of Su’s guard. I guess you saw us?”

“...yeah. By the pond.”

“Oh” 

“Su asked me to give her a tour. Of the island”

“Ok”

“But…  Korra?”

Was that a blush? Why was Asami blushing?

“Yeah?”

“While we’re on the subject, I need to tell you something.”

“...ok?” Why was she suddenly so anxious? 

“I’m not going to be around tomorrow. For most of the day.”

The disappointment that flooded Korra’s body was a physical, tangible force with how strongly it settled in the depths of her stomach. “Oh.”  

“It’s just for tomorrow” Asami hastily added. 

“O-okay...?” She didn’t mean the last part to come out as a question, but couldn’t help the way her tone lifted at the very end with her confusion.

“I just… I need to get off this island for a bit. And I know that is selfish of me, especially since I know you probably feel the same way, but I-”

“Asami. Stop. It’s ok.”

“I just feel-”

“Asami! I get it. Being here sucks. I know it sucks. And… I know I haven’t been the easiest person to be around lately. I understand that you need some time to yourself.” She did. She really really did. It didn’t make it easy to swallow though. Korra took a deep breath and did her best to shove her sadness and self pity deep into her stomach and reached forward to gently clasp Asami’s hands lightly between her own. Asami jumped slightly at the contact, but didn’t pull away, instead curling her fingers around Korra’s broader knuckles. 

“Asami… You are the most amazing, most loyal friend I could ever have hoped for, and I’m lucky to have you in my life. But… but I don’t want you to completely ignore your own just because mine is falling apart-” “Korra. I-” “No. Listen. I want you to go. And more often than just tomorrow. I need to figure out how to-. I need to accept that I might never… We all need to start accepting that this may be-”

“Hey” Asami cut in, tightening her fingers and sweeping the pad of her thumb across Korra’s knuckles. Korra was immediately distracted by the texture of her hands. She had fully expected Asami’s hands to be soft and silky, and was a little surprised at the feel of tough calluses along the ridge of her knuckles and the pads of her palms were tougher than she would have guessed. How had she not noticed that before? It was easy to forget that this beautiful woman in front of her was also a formidable fighter and genius mechanic. Feeling all the different aspects of Asami’s life and strengths and personality in the various ridges and valleys of her fingers was one of the more fascinating things Korra had ever experienced. This was hardly the first time she had touched the other girl’s hands, but it was definitely the first time she had ever really taken note of them. For a brief flicker of a moment, she wondered if Mako had ever noticed this when they-

“I will always,  _ always _ be here for you. You know that right?”

“Asami, you don’t-”

“Please tell me you actually know this”, Asami cut her off again, her tone laced with exasperation. 

“I’m not going anywhere.”

“Asami-”

“OK?”

Asami was squeezing her fingers again, and Korra shifted her grip so that she could squeeze them back, lifting her head so she could meet Asami’s eyes. The sincerity and love shining through was almost overwhelming, and Korra had to swallow past the lump forming in her throat. 

“What if I never-” She couldn’t find it in her to finish the sentence, but she could tell Asami knew what she was trying to say. 

Asami’s gaze softened, and she started rubbing her thumb along Korra’s knuckles again. The sensation was immediately calming and helped fight against the panic and sadness clawing at Korra’s chest. “Then we’ll adjust. Together.” 

She made it sound so simple. So easy. But they both knew that it wasn’t. How could she be the Avatar as a broken shell? How could she fulfill her duties as the bridge between all nations, both physical and spiritual if she couldn’t even walk? Her life wasn’t her own. It never had been. And as much as she was frustrated with her broken state because she missed her strength and independence, the thing that kept her up at night was the debilitating sense that she was utterly failing at her one true purpose. That she was failing the world and everyone in it at a time they needed her the most. Sometimes she thought Asami forgot. Forgot that she was more than just a water tribe girl recovering from a horrible accident. Her life would be so much easier if she was. 

Korra was suddenly overwhelmed with exhaustion. She was tired, and even Asami’s hope was just a little grating and unbearable. She felt the tightness in her eyes as she forced herself to smile and gently pulled her hands free, but Asami didn’t press. 

“OK.” Korra said. She couldn’t think of anything else to say, and she didn’t have the strength or energy to share the magnitude of what was going through her mind. She certainly didn’t have it in her to be the one to dim the lightness and hope in Asami’s eyes. “Thank you”. 

 

 


	5. Asami

 Asami had been correct. She really had needed this. The feelings of trepidation and guilt when she stepped onto the ferry had almost immediately morphed into a profound sense of relief the second the boat bumped up against the City docks. She was _home_. Kuvira didn’t say much as the boat smoothly cut through the waves of the bay, but her eyes sharpened in satisfaction and her lips twisted in her almost-smile at the look of pure happiness Asami was unable to keep off her face as she immediately launched into a tour of the docks and how her company was responsible for building most of the ferries and container ships.

They spent the rest of the morning driving around, showing Kuvira first the super touristy areas of the city then working her way to her more favorite gems. Kuvira’s face was soft and open as she took in all the sights. She stayed mostly quiet though when she did speak, it was usually to ask a profound question or make a nuanced observation that warmed Asami with delight. The metal bender was almost intimidatingly intelligent and incredibly observant and Asami found herself more intellectually stimulated than she had felt since the days she had played pai-sho with her father.

Watching Kuvira as she walked the city streets was also strangely fascinating.

Asami was used to getting a lot of attention when out in public. Whether it was because people recognized her as the CEO of Future Industries or because she was usually on the arm of someone incredibly famous (like a pro-bender, international moverstar or, you know, the _Avatar_ ). Asami was used to a lot of attention, but when she was with Korra, people usually _flocked_ to her presence. Whether it was to shout insults -when approval ratings were low- or shower her with gifts when the people had their rare moments of _not_ having their head up their ass and actually remembered that she had repeatedly _saved the world_ , Korra was rarely able to just walk down the street uninterrupted.

Things with Kuvira were...different. Kuvira radiated an energy that was palpably intimidating, strolling down the streets with a stiff backed regality that set her apart from the masses in a tangible way. People seemed to go out of their way to avoid eye contact, and there was a hushed quality in the air as they wordlessly parted to allow the duo to pass. Where Korra’s strength and personality was like the steady warmth of blazing embers, Kuvira’s was like the cold metal that adorned the armor at her arms and shoulders. However, after the emotional volatility and depression that composed roughly 90% of air temple island, Kuvira’s steady and calm presence was a relief. She may have been far more reserved and stoic than Asami was generally accustomed with Korra and the bender brothers as her most frequent companions, the tranquility was definitely welcome.

It was early evening by the time they made it back to the docks, and having already pointed out the more interesting places of attraction when they had first visited in the morning, were mostly lazily ambling down the pier, killing time while they waited for a ferry to take them back to Airbender Island. Upon asking one of the dock hands how much longer, they were told they had at least another hour to wait, so Asami bought them both a cup of shaved ice from a cart almost comically decorated in water nation tribal markings. Asami fought not to roll her eyes at the vendor when he handed the cups over, his eye and skin tone clearly indicating he was of fire nation descent.  
  
Kuvira accepted her ice with a curious tilt of her head, only taking a bite once Asami had settled against the railing and started eating her own. At Kuvira’s contemplative look, Asami laughed.

“First time trying water nation shaved ice?” she asked. Kuvira frowned down at the cup. “There isn’t really that much of a water nation presence that far inland. At least not in Zaofu.”

Asami hummed in understanding as she licked her spoon clean, turning to face the bay and watch changing colors of the sky as the sun began to set.

“Tell me something about yourself” Asami asked, turning to face the stoic metal bender at her side. Kuvira had set her cup of ice aside and was leaning heavily at the railing.   
  
“What do you want to know?” Kuvira replied, tilting her head to the side and pursing her lips in thought.   
  
“I don’t know. Surprise me”.

Kuvira shrugged and resumed facing the bay. “There isn’t much to know. I’m an orphan and have lived in Zaofu for most of my adult life.”  
  
Asami blinked in surprise. “You’re an orphan?”

Despite the heavy subject matter, Kuvira's face was soft, and the corner of her lips were lifted in her characteristic almost-smile. “Surprising enough?”  
  
Asami nodded. “That must have been very difficult. So how did you end up with Su in Zaofu?”  
  
At the question, Kuvira actually smiled all the way, chuckling a little as she leaned more heavily into her elbows where they were resting against the railing. “That’s actually a very interesting story.”

“Care to share?”

Kuvira lifted her head, still smiling as she stared with sightless eyes out over the bay. “My parents died when I was young. I never knew them. I’m originally from one of the smaller villages in the outskirts of Ba-Sing-Se, and the smaller children without guardians are usually sent to the city so they don’t take up the valuable resources needed by everyone else. I didn’t want to leave, so I ran away and wandered from village to village as a pickpocket; stay in one place just long enough until I would start to get recognized, then I would move on.”

Kuvira glanced over, and pierced Asami with a thoughtful gaze. It was clear she was gauging whether or not Asami was judging her based on her history, so she did her best to keep her face open and didn’t let the encouraging smile drop from her lips. When Asami didn’t interject, Kuvira continued. “Anyways, I was a very skilled earth bender even at a very young age and used it to get myself into all kinds of trouble. I think I was...13? when I met Su. She was passing through whatever village it was I was calling my home at the time, and… well...I actually tried to rob her." 

Asami tried, but she couldn’t hold in the laugh that errupted from her lips.

“You tried to rob a Beifong?”

Kuvira laughed as well, shrugging her shoulders. “Needless to say, it didn't work out too well. In my defense, I had no idea who she was. She looked rich and I was hungry.”  
  
“So what happened?” Asami asked, leaning in as she giggled.  
  
“Exactly what you’d think would happen. She beat me to a pulp with some impressive metal bending, and told me to shape up or suffer worse. She was a little less ‘peace, love and understanding’ back then.”

Asami’s giggles morphed again into a laugh, and Kuvira smiled at the sound before she continued. “Honestly, it was probably the best thing that ever happened to me.”  
  
“And why’s that?”

“That’s when I decided I was going to learn metal bending. It became my sole mission in life to track Su back down and demand a rematch. I didn’t take the humiliation all that well, and took my training very very seriously.”

“Oh I can imagine.”

“However, once I found out who she was and heard about how she was building Zaofu, I packed my small sack of belongings and promptly offered my help. The earth kingdom needs more people like her. People who are willing to actually act when they see injustices in the world. Su saw all the flaws in the way most cities and nations are run, and set out to create one free from the flaws and corruption that cripple the people.”  
  
Asami hummed in agreement. “I didn’t know a place like Zaofu could exist.”

“It is the pinnacle of enlightenment. I just wish Su cared more about sharing that enlightenment with the rest of the world.” There was a hint of bitterness to her tone, and Asami could guess that this was a common point of contention between Su and the captain of her guard.

“So what happened when you showed up in Zaofu? Did Su remember you?”

“She did remember me. However, she welcomed me right away, and offered to train me in metal bending herself. I had already picked up the basics, but you would be a fool to turn down being personally trained in metal bending by a Beifong.”

Asami blinked in shock. “You picked up metal bending...by yourself?”

Kuvira shrugged. “Like I said; I was a very skilled earth bender at a very young age.”

Asami squinted as she analyzed Kuvira’s face, looking for a hint of conceit or cockiness. For Kuvira to pick up metal bending without any form of instruction was… unheard of. Literally the only other person able to do so had been Toph, and she was the one who discovered the bending style in the first place. From what Asami knew, metal bending was extremely difficult. Even Korra had needed someone to explain the basics and it still took her a while with daily tutoring to get the hang of it. She clearly remembered the early days of Korra frustration, and how she didn’t go anywhere without a piece of space rock tucked in her fist, working it from shape to shape with extreme concentration for days. Asami doubted Kuvira had gotten to work with space rock when she was teaching herself. If what Kuvira was saying was true, ‘skilled’ was definitely putting it mildly. Kuvira was likely a bending prodigy.

“Wow”, Asami finally supplied. She didn’t really know what else to say, but Kuvira didn’t seem to mind. After a moment, she tucked her head to the side to peer at Asami around her bulky arm, a teasing glint to her eyes.   
  
“I got my rematch though.”

“Oh?” Asami intoned with a raised brow.  
  
Kuvira nodded.  
  
“And how did that go?”  
  
“I was 17 and dueling a Beifong. I got my ass very thoroughly handed to me.”  
  
Asami, who had poorly decided to take a rather large bite of her shaved ice right at that moment coughed and choked at the unexpected answer, the laughter taking her by surprise and filling her eyes with tears.

Kuvira’s lips quirked into a smile for a brief moment before she turned back to face the bay. “I’ll beat her eventually. It’s one of my life goals to best a Beifong.”

Though her eyes were glinting with some of their earlier mirth, it was clear to Asami that Kuvira wasn’t really joking. She was suddenly and overwhelmingly reminded of Korra. Korra is the only other person she knew that exhibited that kind of dedication to her bending. Asami couldn’t help but wonder what a duel between those two would be like. She strongly suspected it would be both beautiful and terrible in its intensity.  
  
“I have a question” Kuvira intoned, pushing herself up and shifting so she was facing Asami, one hip resting easily against the railing.  
  
“Go ahead”, Asami quiped as she scraped the last of the ice from her cup and licked the spoon clean, twisting to deposit the trash in a nearby bin.  
  
“You and the Avatar…”  
  
“What about us?”  
  
“I recall seeing you both in Zaofu. You were fairly inseparable.”

Asami shrugged. As she had already told Kuvira the day before, Korra was her best friend. Kuvira, however, wasn’t finished.

“Are you two…is she your…?”  
  
Kuvira trailed off, and it took Asami a couple seconds to realize what she was actually asking. When she did, Asami felt the blood drain from her face, and her heart painfully skipped a beat in her chest.  
  
How could Kuvira possibly have guessed…What did she….  
  
Asami fumbled over her words as she struggled to piece together an answer.  
  
“Korra! No. I mean she’s not...We’re not…It’s not like that. She’s just my friend”  
  
Kuvira nodded with a thoughtful pursing of her lips, but Asami definitely could see a knowing glint in her eyes. Asami opened her mouth to continue, but Kuvira put her hands up in submission, signing for Asami to calm down.  
  
“I apologize. I obviously had the situation pegged wrong. I meant no offense.”  
  
Asami exhaled in a rush, struggling to compose herself. It was difficult to say why she felt so flustered. Korra was her best friend. End of story. It felt...weird thinking about her like this. Not necessarily because Asami was totally against it -because she wasn't, and boy was that an interesting revelation- but more because if felt almost like she was disrespecting the friendship to allow herself to twist it like that in her mind. She loved Korra. But she wasn't in love with Korra. She just wanted to be around her all the time, and thought about her more often than not and thought she was one of the most beautiful people she had ever met, inside and out, but that didn't mean anything. Right?

  
“It's...fine. You didn't offend me. I was just surprised. Korra and I are just friends. I respect and admire her very much, but theres nothing beyond that."

When Kuvira continued to look at her with her brow raised in an annoyingly suggestive fashion, Asami rolled her eyes. 

"It's possible to care about and admire someone without there being romantic feelings attached. Just look at you and Su."

Kuvira finally dropped her annoying smirk, but only to widen her eyes a fraction before she started to laugh. Asami looked on in confusion, unsure if she was supposed to join in the laughter or feel insulted.

“That’s probably not the best comparison you could have made Asami”, Kuvira intoned, her grin turning back into that suggestive smirk, leaving Asami feeling even more confused.  
  
When Asami continued to frown, Kuvira actually rolled her eyes before narrowing her gaze, a single brow raised suggestively.

All at once, it clicked.

Asami gasped. “Wait! You and Su?”

Kuvira smirked again as she shrugged, turning again to lean against the railing. “Su and I have had an… _interesting_ …relationship. She has a very…open understanding with her husband.”  
  
Asami gaped in shock. She definitely never would have guessed… Ok _maybe_ she could have guessed about Su and Bataar Sr.

But _Kuvira_? That one was- OK. Maybe that one wasn't so much of a surprise either...

“So… You two are…”  
  
“Lovers? Girlfriends? Not really. No. I’ve known since I was a child that I didn’t like boys, and Su is a very open and free individual. She kind of…helped me understand myself.”  
  
When Asami continued to look at Kuvira in shock, the metal bender leveled her with her piercing stare. “I trust you’ll keep that to yourself. Correct?”

Asami blinked at the question and did her best to push down the feeling of indignation that immediately resulted.

“Of course.”

“I don’t care what people know about me, but the people who would like to discredit Su and her work with Zaofu don’t need more ammunition. Besides, there’s is absolutely nothing between Su and myself anymore. There hasn’t been for a while.”

“I… understand. You don’t need to explain.”

“Thank you”

They lapsed back into a comfortable silence, the sounds of the water lapping at the pier and the cries of the seagulls a tranquil soundtrack for the moment that stretched between them.  
  
A sudden thought had Asami giggling softly under her breath. When Kuvira looked over in question, Asami only laughed harder. “I can’t believe you tried to say that there isn’t much to you. You’re easily one of the most fascinating people i’ve ever met.”

Kuvira almost-smiled at the statement, but the look in her eyes clearly indicated she was pleased. 

“Asami. May I ask you another question?”

That look abruptly shifted to something else, and suddenly Asami felt slightly uneasy. "Yes?”

Kuvira turned to face Asami fully, folding her arms behind her back in that way that made her seem to grow impossibly large.

“I have very much enjoyed your company today. Unless I am mistaken, I think you were enjoying yourself as well. Am I correct?”

Asami felt the urge to tease rise up in her chest, a sarcastic or witty comment that she knew would have had Korra in stitches. She curbed the impulse, however and smiled kindly. “I did. I’m glad you insisted on it. I definitely needed this.”

Kuvira nodded as though expecting the answer before taking a breath. If Asami didn’t know any better, Kuvira almost looked as though she was… psyching herself up-  
  
“If you’re open to it, I would very much like to take you out. On a date. With me.”  
  
It was only her extensive experience dealing in the corporate world that stopped Asami from dropping her jaw in disbelief. Kuvira frowned at Asami’s still and emotionless features.  
  
“If I’m completely off base with my guess about you, I’m truly very sorry, and I hope I didn’t insult you in-”  
  
Asami reached out and rested her hand on the metal bender’s arm, effectively cutting her off.

“No. You didn’t- Just… How did you-?”

Kuvira’s relaxed her stance imperceptibly, her shoulders loosening just enough where she looked a fraction more approachable.

“Honestly?”

Asami nodded.

“It was mostly wishful thinking.”

It took Asami an embarrassingly long second before she realized Kuvira had made a joke. Once it sunk in, she barked out a laugh and Kuvira’s shoulders loosened even more as she smiled hesitantly back.

As she composed herself, Asami truly considered the offer. A date. A romantic date. With Kuvira. The fact that Kuvira was a woman didn’t bother her. Asami knew ever since her days at the boarding school in Ba-Sing-Se that she was attracted to women as well as men. The idea of going on a date was strangely unsettling, which made Asami frown. She was young. She was attractive. And yet the last time she had had any romantic entanglement was her disastrous affair with Mako. Why not go on a date with Kuvira. She was smart and interesting and very attractive if a little intimidating. She hadn’t necessarily felt the sparks of chemistry flaring between, but Asami had hardly been looking. At the very least, a night on the town on the arm of a beautiful woman had the potential of being a very welcome distraction from the tension and stress of the Airbender Island. It’s not like anything serious could possibly come of it. Kuvira was the captain of Zaofu’s guard. Asami was the CEO of Future Industries. Geography alone created an insurmountable obstacle for anything of lasting duration.  
  
While Asami deliberated, Kuvira waited patiently, utterly confident and sure in her posture. Her demeanor seemed to say that she would accept whatever answer she got with grace and understanding, and it was this that finally pushed Asami into making up her mind.  
  
“I think I would like that”, Asami said with a hesitant smile.

And then Asami was blinded as Kuvira’s face blossomed into a smile. She had thought she had seen the metal bender smile several times throughout the day. She had been wrong. It completely transformed her face and for the first time Asami was able to appreciate that this woman was actually _stunning_. Asami also realized she had probably just made a huge mistake if the nerves that exploded in her belly were anything to go by. However she couldn’t help but bask a little in the glow thrown her way. It was nice being looked at like that. She felt special and cared for and wanted in a way she hadn’t felt since her days with Mako, and it was _nice_.

And if there was a small voice in the back of her mind trying to stain the moment with guilt by filling her mind’s eye with _blue_ , she did her best to ignore it.

 


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Korra

When Korra woke, she was groggier than she had been in a long time. Glancing out the window, Korra saw that it was much earlier than she usually got up, so there was a good chance it would be a while before anyone came it to check on her and help her get up and about. She briefly considered just trying to go back to sleep, but now that she was awake, she felt strangely anxious and alert and didn’t think it would be possible for her to close her eyes if she tried. Getting to her chair was going to be difficult, but Korra decided she was going to give it a try. She was tired of feeling so helpless and useless, and the least she could do is learn to get herself around without as much help. In addition to giving a break to everyone who had made themselves so readily available to help Korra in every way she needed, Korra decided she was very tired of being so dependent.

Taking a deep and resolute breath, Korra slowly and painfully pushed herself up and swung her legs over the edge of the bed resting her feet lightly on the floor. Gritting her teeth, Korra grabbed onto the bedpost by her shoulder, and slowly pulled herself up. Her core and back muscles spasmed in protest, and her arms and legs shook and threatened to give out, but she didn’t fall. The chair was just out of reach while holding onto the post, so she was going to have to try and walk. In the back of her mind, Korra knew she was being foolish. She hadn’t walked in weeks, and this was probably the most work her atrophied muscles had gotten since her fight with Zaheer. But Korra was determined. She didn’t know why it was suddenly so important for her to establish this little form of independence, but in that moment, being able to wake up and get to her chair felt like the most important task she had ever attempted.

Korra experimentally lifted one of her legs, but couldn’t quite bend the knee correctly, and all that she was really able to accomplish was slowly sliding her bare foot across the floor in front of her. Her knees were shaking uncontrollably, but miraculously held. Now the hard part. Taking a deep breath and preparing herself for the worst, Korra loosened her death grip on the bedpost and gently pushed herself forward, attempting to find her balance on her weak and unused limbs. For the briefest of moments, she thought she was going to be able to make it. Her legs held and she was standing, but before she could gain any satisfaction from the accomplishment, it all came crashing down. Her knees gave, and she began to fall. Even in her weak and useless state, Korra’s reflexes kicked in and she tried to launch herself forward with all her might. If she was going to go down, at least she could go down closer to her chair than when she started.

She crashed painfully against the metal frame of her chair and bit back a cry of pain as her arm collided with steel. She was draped half in and half out of the chair, her legs fanned out uselessly behind her in painful spasms. She experimentally tried to bend her knee to see if she could use it to push herself further up, but the pain that screamed its way up her calf to her hamstrings was momentarily blinding. Frustration and anger welled up in Korra’s chest, so sudden and strong that she felt her eyes tear up. It didn’t make any sense. It only seemed logical that after weeks of rest and healing, she should at least have experienced slight improvement, but the pain and weakness in her limbs didn’t seem to have eased in the slightest. She was so wrapped up in misery and anger that she didn’t hear the footsteps enter the room.

“Korra!”

Korra looked up. Su was standing in the doorway, a shocked and concerned expression etched in the lines of her face. She rushed over, and gently helped to untangle Korra from the cold metal arms of her chair. Korra bit back a yelp of pain as she was picked up when her legs were wrenched out of their cramped position, and relief was slow to come after Su helped set her into the familiar confines of her wheelchair.

Instead of immediately wheeling her out of the room, Su grabbed a chair and sat opposite Korra, looking at the younger woman in worry and concern. Korra expected Su to do or say something to fill the silence but she didn’t, and instead let Korra relax and slow her breathing. Once the pain in her legs and back had dimmed to a steady but manageable ache, Korra sighed in defeat, gripping the arms of her chair until her knuckles had turned white.

“I don’t understand” Korra said, her voice cracking in defeat.

“Understand what?” Su asked gently.

“Why is this happening to me? Why aren’t I getting better? I’ve gone to every healing session, and it feels like everyone has tried everything. Why isn’t it working? Why do I still feel so terrible?”

Su looked at Korra with a sad frown of understanding. It was a while before she replied.

“I know your body still feels broken, but how are you doing?”

Korra looked at Su in confusion.

“I just told you. I…”

“You just told me about how the healing doesn’t seem to be working, but I’m not talking about your body. How are you coping with all of this mentally?”

Korra huffed out a breath through her nose, and squinted at the woman across from her. She didn’t know why, but the question made her a little angry.

“How do you think I’m doing? Look at me!”  
Instead of immediately answering, Su leaned back slightly in her chair and studied Korra with a piercing gaze. Korra resisted the urge to squirm in her seat, defiantly matching the woman’s stare. Finally Su sighed, and released Korra from the intense study.

“I think-” Su began, her words gentle and steady.

“ -you feel hurt and broken and lost. I think the effect all of this had on your mind far outweighs that which happened to your body, and I think you haven’t really addressed the effect all this had on you in any meaningful way.”

Korra shut her mouth with a snap, and looked sharply away, folding her arms tightly against her chest. Though she knew Su didn’t mean to be mean or hurtful, Korra was having a hard time not getting offended. She made it sound so easy. Like all she had to do was meditate a little and ‘POOF, all better’.

“Korra. What is it that you want?”

Korra huffed with indignation.

“That’s a stupid question. I want to heal. Get better.”

“OK. Why?”

Korra looked at Su with a quick snap of her head. What was that supposed to mean? Her anger immediately turned to unease.

“Where are you going with this Su?”

“Lets say you could snap your fingers right now, and you were suddenly all better. No pain. No weakness. What then? What would you want to do?”

Korra opened her mouth to speak, then paused. She had no idea how to respond. Her immediate answer was that she would help restore order in the earth kingdom, but what could she possibly do that the airbenders and police couldn’t? Any time she had meddled in the world’s political affairs, all she had done is create enemies, and the idea of launching into this particular issue made Korra tired even thinking about it. Maybe she would resume her search and focus on finding more airbenders to help restore the air nation. But again, there were many others that were actively already doing whatever they could to accomplish this goal. It was her job as the avatar to help maintain balance in the world, but in that moment, Korra had no idea how to even start. No matter what she did, it only seemed to cause more problems. It felt like things were more out of balance now than they had ever been, and were mostly a direct result of decisions she had made and the consequences of her actions.

Korra felt as though the wind had been suddenly and completely let out of her sails. She slumped in her chair, all the fight leaving her in a rush.

“I…I don’t know.” Korra said, her voice cracking in defeat.

“Everything is so messed up. And it’s all my fault.”

Su nodded in understanding and leaned forward, her elbows resting on her knees.

“Yes. Things are definitely a little shaky right now. But why do you think it’s your fault?”

Korra shrugged, letting out a dejected sigh.

“Its my job as the Avatar to maintain balance in the world. But right now, things are worse than they’ve been since before the end of the war.”

Korra briefly recalled a conversation she had had with Tenzin in which she had said something very similar. She recalled feeling much better with the reminder of all the good that had come of the mess, including the revival of the airbenders, but that was before the earth queen had died and the earth kingdom had been thrown into chaos. It was before she had learned of the red lotus and the extent of their influence, and before her fight with the anarchists had left her a broken shell of the strong woman she had once been.

She looked at Su, fully expecting her to disagree and start siting all of the good things that had come from Korra’s actions. Instead, Su gently leaned forward and grasped one of Korra’s hands between hers.

“I’m not going to lie to you Korra. Things are pretty bad. And while its not necessarily your fault, you were definitely directly involved in most of it.”

Korra frowned angrily, and tried to pull her hand from the other woman’s grasp. However, Su tightened her grip and didn’t let go.

“But, things have been out of balance for a very long time. Aang and his friends did an amazing job putting the world back on course, but true balance and peace was still far from achieved.”

Korra stared with sightless eyes at the ground, feeling too upset to meet Su’s gaze.

“Change is never easy. It’s hard and uncomfortable, and easily indistinguishable from complete and utter chaos. That’s what’s going on right now. Both in the world, and for you. I know everything feels hopeless and bleak, but that’s just because right now, we’re in the absolute thick of it. Change itself is never a bad thing. Without change, there can’t be growth. Without growth, there can’t be improvement. Without change, balance can not be found or maintained.”

Su paused, and dipped her head, trying to meet Korra’s eyes with her own. She waited patiently until Korra cautiously looked up.

“Right now, you are broken. You can look at your situation and be mad and resentful and bitter with the cards you have been dealt. Or, you can take this amazing opportunity to rebuild yourself into something stronger than what you were before. Now I cant tell you how to do this. No one can. But I do know from personal experience that it starts with letting go of what you think everyone else expects of you, and decide on goals for yourself. As the Avatar, it’s your duty to help maintain balance in the world. To do that, you need to learn how to maintain balance within yourself. Make peace with yourself and who you are in this moment right now.”

Korra sat in silence, letting Su’s words wash over her in a gentle wave. She had never considered looking at her situation in this light. She had been so wrapped up all the negative things going on both within her body and the world around her that it seemed impossible to consider anything positive may be occurring.

Rebuild herself. What would that even look like?

Korra felt as her fingers where gently squeezed and looked up as Su stood.

“Focus on what you want and need; what makes you feel happy and whole. Just think about it. Right now, you have a healing session you need to get to.”

 

* * *

Su had taken her to an acupuncturist she had brought with her from Zaofu and though she didn’t physically feel much different, her mind felt clearer than it had in a long time. Afterwards, Su and the gentle therapist had conversed in hushed tones, though Korra was too wrapped up in her own thoughts to care too much about what they were saying. 

The sound of footsteps echoing hollowly on the stone floor broke Korra out of her silent reverie. Looking up, she saw Su walking towards her, a guarded yet hopeful expression on her face. Once she reached where Korra was perched, she bent the stone up into a bench beneath her with a casual flick of her wrist, and sat down.

“Korra. I want to ask you a few questions.”

Korra immediately tensed up, expecting another emotional onslaught like the one Su had subjected her to earlier. While Korra was grateful for the insight, she didn’t think she was emotionally able to handle any more life lessons to ‘think about’ right then.

Su smiled and raised both her hands shaking her head, obviously guessing at what Korra was thinking.

“No. No. Nothing like that. I won’t dump anymore like that on you. I want to ask you about how you’ve physically been doing.”

“Oh” Korra said, relaxing back into her chair.

“Ok. What do you want to know?”

“I know you said earlier that you didn’t feel as though you were getting any better. Can you tell me why? Have you truly had no progress?”

Korra shook her head, recalling with vivid clarity how just that morning her legs had seized up with incredible pain upon bearing her weight for only a few seconds.

“No. None. Sometimes my arms don’t feel as bad, but my legs and back hurt as badly as they did when the poison was still in me. Its like my muscles are so thin and weak that they tear whenever I even think about using them.”

Su pinched her brows in thought and rested her chin in her hand, absent-mindedly tapping her cheek with her finger.

“And it hasn’t gotten any better?”

“No” Korra responded without hesitation.

“I want to try something.” Su said, pushing herself off her makeshift bench. She walked over so she was standing directly in front of Korra and crouched down, gently placing both her hands around one of Korra’s calves.

Korra watched with rapt attention as Su slowly moved her hands up and down, her face scrunched in concentration. After a moment, she grunted, lowering her hands to the ground to push herself back up. Korra tried to be patient, but when Su didn’t immediately say anything, she couldn’t help herself.

“What? What did you feel?”

Su sat back down on the bench and took a deep breath.

“I think there’s a good chance there’s still some of the poison in your system.”

Korra jumped in surprise. Su saw Korra’s panicked expression, and raised her arms in a calming gesture.

“Not enough to kill you. But I think some has settled deep into the larger muscles in your legs and back. I can’t tell for sure, but I’m pretty sure I felt…something”.

When Su didn’t continue, Korra leaned forward, eager and more hopeful than she had felt in weeks.

“Do you think you can do something about it?”

Korra could hear the desperation in her voice, but didn’t care. Su had just offered her the first real glimpse of a light at the end of the tunnel. She had the ghostly thought that it would be unwise to let her get her hopes up too much, but was unable to heed the advice. Su’s hypothesis just made too much sense. The best healers in the world had treated her regularly, and nothing had worked. She had felt the poison rip its way through her muscles into her blood stream when Zaheer had his fellow red lotus member bend it into her skin. It made sense that maybe Su hadn’t been able to get it all out that first time.

“I think so, but I’m going to need some help. To be able to manipulate metal in the minute quantities we’re dealing with here, we’re going to need a true master of the element.”

“Do you think Lin could help?”

Su shook her head.

“I think it’s time my mother called an end to her travels and came home.”

Korra blinked in surprise.

“Toph? You think Toph can help?”

Of course the idea made perfect sense. Who could do better at manipulating the tiny amount of metal in her system than the woman who had discovered the ability to do so in the first place?

“If anyone can, it will be my mother. I’ll do my best to reach her. In the mean time, I want you to think about what we talked about earlier. Just because we may have a handle on how to fix your body doesn’t mean you still don’t need to work on everything else.”

Before Korra could answer, Su stood and waved over an air acolyte whom had just been passing in front of them.

“Can you please escort the Avatar wherever she would like?”

The acolyte bowed and walked over, grasping Korra’s handles. Su placed a comforting hand on Korra’s shoulder.

“We’ll do our part Korra. You focus on yours.”

Korra nodded, and watched the metal bender walk away.

“Where would you like to go Avatar Korra?” the acolyte gently asked from behind her.

All Korra wanted was a quiet and peaceful place to think, and knew of one place that would help.

“Can you take me to the docks please? I’d like to be near the ocean right now if that’s alright.”

The acolyte nodded, and turned her around.

* * *

When Korra was close enough to smell the fresh bite of the ocean air and feel the cool mist on her face, she felt immensely better. Being next to water always had that effect on her. Korra replayed Su’s words over and over in her head. The idea that she would actually be pain free was incredible. Her body had become a useless shell, and the idea of being free from her current limitations made Korra light headed. Her mind immediately raced with what she would do once she could move about freely, but along with the ponderings, Su’s message from the morning drifted to the surface. The metal bender had been right. Korra’s broken body was only half of the problem. She still had no idea what she was going to do once she was better.

She thought about the questions Su had asked her earlier.

What did she need? What made her happy?

Ever since she had arrived in Republic city, her wants and needs had taken a back seat to whatever crisis was occurring. Her life had become one giant reaction to whatever it was that was going on. Moments in which she had felt truly happy and at ease were far and few between.

Her first thoughts were of when she had met Mako and Bolin and was competing with them in pro-bending. When she was competing with the brothers, she didn’t feel like the Avatar with the weight of the world resting on her shoulders. She felt like a regular teenager having a good time with friends. After the equalist movement had called a sudden halt to her pro-bending career, that feeling had become less and less frequent. Her defeat of Amon had altered how everyone treated her. Everyone respected her as a fully realized Avatar, which was great, but they also seemed to forget that she was also just a teenaged girl. Everyone always seemed to want and need something from her.

Well…almost everyone. The only person that hadn’t really treated her any differently was Asami. When she was with Asami, she didn’t feel like the Avatar. Asami didn’t look at Korra with the expectation that she would have all the answers, or solve all her problems. If Korra didn’t know what to do, Asami was the only one who consistently made her feel like everything was ok and would work out in the end. The more Korra thought about it, she realized she couldn’t recall one time in which Asami had complained or asked Korra for anything. The revelation made Korra frown.

Asami had nearly lost everything. Her mother was dead, her father had tried to kill her, and at one point even the legacy of her company looked like it was going to be taken away. But not once had Asami ever turned to Korra to solve her problems for her. She realized other things as well. Whenever Korra was stressed out, or having a particularly difficult time with something, Asami had readily made herself available and offered her help in whatever way she could. Whenever Korra needed to talk or wanted support, she knew she could turn to Asami. When Korra felt like the weight of her responsibilities was becoming too much and she wasn’t able to handle it anymore, Asami had been there; her own personal pillar of strength and fortitude to draw upon when she didn’t have enough on her own. When Korra’s life had completely fallen apart, Asami had stood by her side, patiently picking up and holding onto the pieces until Korra was ready and able to mend the cracks and rebuild herself.

Asami makes me happy, Korra thought with a start.

Suddenly Korra wanted more than anything to see her friend. She wanted to share her hopes at Su’s idea of how to fully heal the damage done by the poison. She wanted to confide in Asami the doubts and fears she had upon entering back into the world once she was healed and whole. She wanted to see Asami’s hopeful and warm smile, and feel her encouraging hands hold her own.

The sound of a foghorn caused Korra to look up. The ferry lazily floated its way towards the island, and she was just able to make out the distant shape of Asami’s Sato mobile parked on the deck. Korra smiled, and waited patiently for the ferry to complete its journey, rolling herself slowly over to where the carrier would eventually dock.

The boat gently bumped against the dock and the gates opened, releasing a steady stream of people from the deck. Korra smiled softly in anticipation while she waited for a glimpse of her friend. However, once she spotted her, Korra’s smile immediately turned into a frown. All of her confused feelings from the day before came crashing down as Korra watched Asami step off the boat, laughing as she steadied herself with a hand on the shoulder of a familiar tall metal bender. Asami slipped on the slick surface of the dock, and the other woman reached out and grabbed her hips, keeping Asami from falling into the water. Both burst into laughter before resuming their walk towards the shore, leaning intimately into each other’s space as they talked. Korra’s chest tightened with an unidentifiable emotion at seeing Asami laughing and smiling so freely with this other woman. Every smile…every touch…felt like a punch to her stomach.

Korra saw Asami’s eyes widen in surprise when she finally saw the Avatar. Asami glanced at the metal bender beside her for the briefest of moments, and it was only due to how well Korra knew her friend that she recognized the flash of guilt that crossed her features before the heiress was able to settle her face into a composed and friendly mask. Asami elbowed the tall woman next to her and pointed in Korra’s direction before walking with a more purposeful stride towards the wheelchair bound woman.

While the pair drew closer, Korra struggled to manage her emotions. Her heart was pounding painfully in her chest, and her thoughts flipped back and forth from happy to angry with a speed and frequency that was starting to give her a headache.

Why was this happening? What was wrong with her? So Asami was hanging out with a friend in the city all day. So what if it was a friend Korra had never heard of or seen besides yesterday. Why did that matter? By the time Asami and the metal bender had reached the end of the dock where the Avatar was seated, Korra’s temples were throbbing painfully, and her mood had settled into a deep and dark place usually reserved for mortal enemies and Tenzin enforced early morning meditations. Asami’s smile faltered when she picked up on the Avatar’s stormy countenance. She glanced from Korra to the woman next to her, and resumed her smile, but Korra could tell it was forced.

“Korra. How are you doing?”

All thoughts of the wonderful things she wanted to share with Asami were gone as Korra struggled to compose herself against the onslaught of feelings she had upon seeing her friend. She wanted more than anything for things to be as they usually were, but for some reason the tall metal bender standing to Asami’s right made that impossible.

“I’m fine”, Korra said tightly. The words were brisk and cold and once they were out, Korra resisted the urge to wince. She absolutely didn’t sound like herself. Asami looked at Korra with uncertainty. It was clear that she knew that something wasn’t quite right with her friend. Korra spared a quick glance at Asami’s tall companion. Asami followed the look, and Korra was just able to make out the slight blush that spread across her raven-haired friend’s cheeks.

“Oh. Uh…This is Kuvira. Kuvira, this is Korra. Kuvira is the commander of Su’s metal benders”. Asami feebly gestured from one woman to the other as she made the introductions. Korra gave Kuvira a curt nod, and was going to leave it at that, but the tall metal bender closed the distance between them with one large stride and held her hand out expectantly.

“Avatar Korra. It’s an honor to officially meet you. Asami has told me nothing but great things about you.”

While it was probably meant as a courteous and polite gesture, the thought of Asami talking about her with this stranger made Korra immediately bristle. She briefly considered ignoring the hand that was held out in front of her expectantly, but when she glanced up and saw Asami’s concerned and disapproving frown, changed her mind.

Fine. She would shake the damn hand. Didn’t mean she had to like it though.

She reached out, and firmly grasped the hand held in front of her, and was barely able to hold back a wince. Either Kuvira didn’t quite know the strength of her own hand, or she was trying to break Korras. Korra’s frown deepened, and she put a little more pressure into her grip. There was no way she would be able to match the strength of the metal bender in her current state, but she would do her best. Korra looked up into Kuvira’s face, fully expecting the other woman to be sneering condescendingly down at her, but the metal bender’s face was serene and peaceful. She gave one final little squeeze that Korra could was sure caused at least a fracture before letting go and resisted the urge to shake her hand out so that her fingers would retain their normal shape.

An uneasy silence settled over the trio, but Korra couldn’t find it within herself to care. Kuvira had moved back into Asami’s space and looked calm and confident, and Korra had never wanted to punch someone as badly as she did then.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Asami

Asami looked back and forth between Korra and Kuvira, then tension so thick and heavy among the trio it could have been cut with a knife. Korra was sitting stiff backed and angry, studiously avoiding anyone’s eyes, though her gaze would occasionally shoot up to land on Asami with unease, and Kuvira with was what was best described as loathing. Korra’s reaction to the metal bender was extremely odd. For reasons unknown, the Avatar had seemed to take an immediate and intense dislike to Kuvira, and Asami couldn’t begin to guess why. She wracked her brain for a memory of when the two could have possibly met, but as far as she knew, Korra hadn’t had any more interaction with the metal bender than she had prior to meeting her more thoroughly the day before.

Kuvira was as calm as ever, but Asami couldn’t help but notice how when she had stepped back from shaking the Avatar’s hand, she had stepped more fully into Asami’s space. Though it was easy to miss if you weren’t looking for it, the message was there. Kuvira was silently and subtly staking her claim, though why she would feel the need was kind of confusing. It’s not as though Korra were any real threat. While Asami was sure that Kuvira had guessed at the nature of her true feelings for the Avatar, it’s not like there was the real possibility of anything ever coming of them. Korra only viewed her as a friend, and Asami didn’t see there ever being the possibility of that changing. Despite the irrationalness of the behavior, Kuvira’s message was clear: ‘Asami is mine and not yours. Nice to meet you though’.

Asami watched with increasing anxiety as her best friend squirmed uncomfortably in her chair. She couldn’t even begin to guess at what Korra was thinking, but it was clear that she wasn’t in the greatest place. Asami scrambled for a way to diffuse the situation before her fiery friend did or said something that would make the situation even worse.

“So…how was your day?” Asami asked.

“Fine.” Korra snapped out. Asami flinched at the curt response, and Korra noticed. She watched as the Avatar took a deep breath. Upon her exhale, her frown had eased a little, and she attempted what was probably meant to be a smile. The result however, was Korra looked like she was in a considerable amount of pain.

“I’m sorry. Healing stuff was hard today. I’m just a little tired...”

Asami nodded in understanding, but continued to look at Korra in concern. She saw Korra’s face darken once more and immediately after felt Kuvira’s warm hand on the small of her back.

“I should probably go check in with Su. She’s meeting with Lin later today, and I want to be there to see what it is my men and I can do to help.”

Asami felt Kuvira’s hand slide around her waist, enclosing her in a partial hug. Asami tore her eyes from Korra’s dark and gloomy expression to look at Kuvira to say good-bye.

“I understand.” Asami said, doing her best to mirror the easy smile that had come so naturally only moments before.

“Tomorrow night?”

Asami nodded, doing her best to ignore the daggers she could see shooting their way out of the corner of her eye. Korra’s behavior was starting to piss her off. It was one thing to be rude and mean to her close friends and family, but another alltogether to treat a total stranger this way.

“Of course.” Asami replied, confirming that they were set for their date.

Kuvira walked away, her hand trailing across Asami’s lower back, and gently clasping her hand in parting. The public display caught Asami a little off guard, and she glanced sharply at Korra once Kuvira’s fingers had finished sliding out of her own. Korra almost looked as though she were in pain, but once she saw Asami looking at her, her angry scowl snapped back into place.

Ok. Enough was enough. Once Kuvira was out of earshot, Asami crossed her arms across her chest and angrily glared down at the petulant Avatar.

“You want to tell me what that was all about?” Asami said, doing her best to keep her voice even and controlled.

“I was going to ask you the same thing” Korra spat back angrily.

Asami recoiled at the venom in the Avatar’s voice.

“What’s your problem Korra?”

Korra’s scowl impossibly deepened even further.

“My problem?! What’s yours!?” Korra spat back.

Asami resisted the urge to laugh meanly at Korra’s childish tantrum like behavior, and threw her hands up with frustration.

“I honestly don’t know what has gotten into you today, but you can’t just treat people like this. You can’t treat ME like this. I know you’re feeling bad with everything that’s going on with you, but snap out of it! I’m tired of being your punching bag!”

Korra recoiled as though she had been physically struck. She opened and shut her mouth several times, seemingly unable to figure out how to respond.

In absolute shock, Asami saw as Korra’s eyes filled with tears, and took a halting step forward. She was still extremely angry, but seeing Korra react so strongly was very difficult to watch. Korra recoiled upon seeing Asami’s hesitant advance, and visibly steeled herself, taking a deep breath that effectively stopped the tears.

Korra opened her mouth one more time, but the words seemed to get stuck in her throat, and she once again shut her mouth with an audible snap.

Asami couldn’t even begin to guess what the Avatar was thinking or feeling. Even though she was still very angry, not rushing to comfort Korra upon seeing her so upset and miserable was physically painful. Asami’s stomach twisted itself into a knot as she watched the Avatar pull herself together, constructing a wall around herself that was so thick and impenetrable, Asami could almost feel it.

Asami stared down at the Avatar, waiting for her to say something….anything…But Korra turned her head to the side and stared sightlessly at the ground, her eyes glazed with the thin sheen of unshed tears. Asami felt a wave of frustration so intense, she had to resist the urge to bend down and shake the Avatar until she got the reaction she was looking for. Even though Korra was right in front of her, she suddenly missed her friend so much her chest ached at the loss. For some reason, Korra wasn’t...Korra anymore.

Asami sighed heavily in defeat and turned around. Looking at the Avatar while she felt so closed off and upset was suddenly more difficult that Asami could bear. She took one hesitant step away, but stopped. Without turning, Asami spoke.

“Korra…I miss you. I miss my friend. Please come back to me.”

Though Asami wasn’t expecting an answer, she still felt achingly disappointed when Korra remained silent. Taking a deep breath and ignoring the slight catch in her throat, Asami walked away, leaving Korra alone with her thoughts to stew and simmer on the dock.

 

***

Asami didn’t see Korra for the rest of the day, and didn’t go to check on the Avatar the next morning like she usually did as well. She had slept terribly, her thoughts a swirling mess of memories of the drastic ups and downs of the day. Just when she thought her mind had calmed, Korra’s sad and dejected face would float to the surface of her consciousness, causing a deep ache in Asami’s chest. The poor sleep, coupled with the stress of fighting with Korra and the anxiety she felt over her date with Kuvira left Asami an absent-minded mess. Twice, she saw Korra in the distance being rolled around by some air acolyte, and the heady swirl of emotion left Asami feeling even more exhausted.

When the sun began to set, Asami decided that she should start getting ready for her date and returned to her room. She aimlessly ambled around her room pulling clothes out at random, only half paying attention to what she was doing. Everything felt so messed up and wrong. Asami ached for things to go back to how they had been when Korra was happy and whole and herself with an intensity that was almost painful. She missed Korra’s vibrancy and humor. She missed Korra’s easy laugh and warm smile. She was so sure the Avatar had actually started to get better. Seeing that Korra had wheeled herself to her room had appeared as the sign she had been looking for that things were on the up swing. All her hopes had been completely destroyed at the Avatar’s crazy mood swing at the docks.  
Asami still couldn’t understand what had happened. It had almost seemed as though Korra was jealous, but she couldn’t understand why. As far as Korra knew, Kuvira was just another friend. Why had she reacted so intensely to the metal bender? The memory darkened Asami’s mood.

She had just started brushing her hair when she heard a soft knock on her door. Asami checked the clock on the wall in confusion while she stood to go see who it was. It was only 5, and Kuvira had stated that she would be waiting at the Air Temple docks around 6. She walked over and opened the door to find Korra in her wheelchair looking downcast and sad. Judging by the harsh circles under the Avatar’s eyes, it was clear she had had at least as much trouble sleeping as Asami did.

“Hey”, Korra said by way of greeting.

“Hi” Asami said, crossing her arms in front of her. The memories of Korra’s hurtful behavior were still fresh in her mind, and the resulting anger was a slow simmer just below the surface of Asami’s usually impenetrable calm.

“Um…can I talk to you?”

Asami gave a curt nod.

“Can I come in?”

Wordlessly, Asami stepped aside. Korra didn’t move, haltingly reaching up to scratch the back of her neck.

“I don’t know if I…Do you think you can…”

Asami knew what Korra was asking, but waited it out. Korra looked up at her imploringly, but when she didn’t move, the Avatar sighed and lowered her head in defeat.

“OK. OK. Asami, can you please help roll me into your room?”

The heiress wordlessly walked behind the chair, grasped the handles and rolled the Avatar into the room. She positioned Korra in front of her dressing table and walked back over to where she had previously been perched and sat, crossing her arms as she looked at the Avatar expectantly.

Korra squirmed a little in her chair, fiddling with her hands where they rested uneasily in her lap.

“So…How was your day?”

“Fine”

“You sleep ok?”

“Yep”

“Yeah…Me too.”

Asami didn’t move, and for a while, the two girls just sat in uneasy silence. Asami stared at Korra unapologetically, her arms still folded across her chest. She wore an expression usually reserved for when she had to deal with particularly difficult businessmen she knew were trying to cheat her out of something, and it was definitely having the desired effect. Korra was intently studying her hands as they twisted in her lap. When it became clear Asami wasn’t going to do anything to fill the tense silence, Korra took a deep breath and visibly steeled herself.

“Asami. I’m…I’m sorry about yesterday. I don’t know why I was acting that way, but I know it was stupid and wrong, and…and I’m sorry”

Korra looked up at Asami, her face the very definition of remorse and atonement. Asami felt a conflicting wave of frustration and compassion well in her chest. Damn Korra and those big puppy dog eyes! She was pretty sure the Avatar didn’t know the power she could wield when she turned that look on people, and fervently hoped she never would. Asami slowly exhaled through her nose, unaware that she had even been holding her breath. She relaxed her arms from their stiff and rigid hold around her chest and finally released Korra from her stare.

“I don’t know why, but it was…hard…seeing you with that…with Kuvira.” Korra continued as she took a deep breath.

“If felt like you were…Like I was…I don’t know. Being replaced or something.”

Asami’s head snapped up, and she studied her friend more closely. Korra’s eyes were dazed and she looked so sad and defeated, Asami felt her stomach twist. Just as she opened her mouth, Korra cut her off. 

“I know its stupid. I just haven’t ever seen you with another friend that’s a girl. I don’t know why it makes such a difference. But seeing you with…Kuvira,” Korra visibly struggled with saying the name “It was just…different than seeing you with Mako and Bolin or anyone else.”

So her friend had been jealous. Korra’s reaction made much more sense now, and Asami suddenly felt a sharp sting of guilt. Now that she thought about it, she could understand why Korra would have felt uncomfortable. Team Avatar rarely came across anyone who wasn’t significantly older and looked at them all as practically children. Kuvira was the first person close to their age Asami had taken up spending time with, and furthermore, was the first woman. Asami leaned forward and tried to catch Korra’s eyes. The Avatar refused to look up, stareing with sightless eyes at her lap.

“Korra”, Asami began

“You know how much I care about you, right?”

Korra didn’t respond, but minutely nodded her head.

“Then you should know that nothing is going to change how I feel about you.”

Korra finally looked up, her eyes glazed with a thin sheen of unshed tears.

“But I’ve been so horrible to you. Why wouldn’t you want to…”, Korra trailed off and Asami was truly curious as to how she was going to finish that sentence.

Leave? Not be her friend anymore? Abandon her?

Asami’s heart broke when she realized the extent of Korra’s insecurities. She reached over and grasped one of Korra’s hands where it sat twisting in her lap.

“Hey. You’re stuck with me ok? I’m not going anywhere. No one is going to replace you. I will always care about you. Do you understand me?”

Korra finally looked up into Asami’s eyes.

Korra’s face was more pale than usual, but the natural dark tone of her skin served as a perfect frame for the azure orbs that carried the light of Korra’s very essence within. They’re so blue, Asami thought in wonderment. For a moment, she was lost. She couldn’t have looked away if she tried. Korra seemed transfixed as well, and Asami watched with curiosity as Korra’s jaw went slack, her lips parting ever so slightly, her brows knit in confusion. They were leaning so close into each other’s space that Asami could feel the faint breeze from Korra’s sweet breath, and could see how hers gently ruffled the loose hairs that framed the Avatars face. The spell was broken when Korra blinked, leaning back a little in her chair releasing a pent up breath in a rush. Asami blinked as well and released Korra’s hands from her hold, trying to clear the fog that had settled in her brain.

Korra cleared her throat and reached up to scratch the back of her neck; a familiar gesture Asami knew indicated that the Avatar was feeling self conscious and uncomfortable. Asami sympathized. She was definitely feeling more than a little dazed and confused herself. That had been…interesting.

“Thank you…I guess… I just needed to hear that. You know?”

Asami nodded in understanding, her mind racing for a way to bring things back to a more familiar and comfortable place.

“You going to be nice now?”

Korra laughed uneasily.

“I know. I know. I’ll definitely do my best.”

Korra looked around, noticing her surroundings for the first time.

“You going somewhere tonight?”

Crap.

“Um…yeah. I’m going to go to the city with Kuvira.”

Korra frowned a little, but Asami had to give her credit. The mood shift wasn’t nearly as severe as it had been the day before, and Korra looked like she was trying to compose herself and stay true to her word.

“Oh yeah. I remember.”

While the words weren’t spoken with nearly as much warmth as there had been moments before, she wasn’t snarling, so Asami was cautiously optimistic that she would be able to navigate her way through this conversation without it turning into a repeat of the day before.

“Why are there clothes all over your bed?” Korra asked in honest bewilderment.

“Just trying to figure out what I’m going to wear” Asami said with a shrug as she turned to pick up the brush so she could resume brushing her hair. Asami was proud. Her hands had stopped shaking, and there was only the slightest tremble in her fingers as they worked the brush.

“Why aren’t you going to wear what you always wear?”

If she weren’t so worried about breaking the fragile truce between them, or exposing the fact that she was actually going on a date, Asami would have laughed. However, she froze mid-way through a stroke of her brush, and scrambled to come up with a satisfactory answer.

“I…was thinking about showing Kuvira the swankier areas in Republic City, and didn’t want to be wearing my normal street clothes in case I ran into any of my investors.”

It was moments like this when Asami was particularly grateful for her experience working with cunning and ruthless businessmen and investors which had honed her ability to think quickly, and on her feet into a sharp and always prepared weapon. She hated lying to Korra, even if by omission, but the thought of telling the Avatar that she was going on a date with a woman, and had done so in the past was extremely terrifying. She had no idea how Korra would react, and the thought of Korra rejecting who she was, was more than Asami was willing to risk right then. She knew she would eventually have to tell Korra about herself, especially if this thing with Kuvira went anywhere, but she didn’t have it in herself to bring it up. Their once strong friendship felt weak and fragile and Asami was fairly sure a revelation of this magnitude would shatter it altogether.

Korra shakily rolled herself over to the bed and studied the various articles of clothing that were sprawled out. She picked up a small and low-cut silk tank top Asami had actually been leaning towards, and held it in front of her. Her face was an interesting mixture of horror and disbelief as she turned to Asami.

“You were thinking about wearing this?”

Doing her best to act as though there was nothing wrong, Asami shrugged and resumed brushing her hair.

“Yeah. I’m thinking about it.”

“Don’t you think it’s a little too…”,

Asami turned and looked at Korra, her eyebrow raised in question. In that moment, Asami wanted nothing more for her innocent and tomboyish friend to finish that sentence.

“You’ll be cold” Korra finished lamely.

It was a testament to Asami’s will power that she was able to hold in the laugh that had climbed its way high into her throat.

“I’ll wear a jacket. Thank you for your concern though.”

Korra let out a forced laugh, however the troubled look never quite left her eyes.

“That’s what friends are for…Right?”

***

Asami arrived at the docks with 15 minutes to spare, but Kuvira was already waiting by the railing. She rose from her seat to greet Asami once she saw the heiress walking her way, and gently grabbed Asami’s hand and raised it to her lips by way of greeting. Kuvira’s breath was cool on the back of her hand, and the lips that gently brushed her fingers were soft and sure. It was a testament to how out of practice Asami was at all this at the sudden wave of insecurity and nervousness that rushed over her in a wave. Trying to cover her sudden uncertainty, Asami took a step back and looked Kuvira up and down in mock scrutiny. The metal bender’s hair was pulled back into a low and loose ponytail. She wore a pair of grey slacks that fit snugly around the tall woman’s strong legs and hips and the loose black button up long sleeved shirt rolled up around her forearms was open enough at the collar to barely hint at the slight swell of her chest underneath. She looked strong and masculine, but with a softness only a woman could achieve. Asami had the sudden overwhelming curiosity at what Korra would look like wearing the same outfit. Kuvira saw the play of emotion flash across Asami’s face, and her confident smile faltered.

“Like what you see?” Kuvira said.

Asami snapped her mind back to the present and shook her head.

“Oh. You’ll do”, she teased.

Kuvira smiled at the joke, and took a dramatic step back, gently twirling Asami in a circle by the hand she still held, whistling in appreciation as she exaggeratedly surveyed Asami from top to bottom. Asami laughed and looked up at Kuvira with a raised brow. Asami had chosen a simple black dress with red highlights embroidered at the edges. The dress hung to just above her knees, and the heels she wore increased her height so she was almost eye level with the Zaofu native. She wore a light silk jacket and had a small black clutch purse tucked securely under her arm. It felt strange to be dressed up in such finery after so long. She felt naked and vulnerable and for a second, she wished she had gone along with Korra’s outfit choice that had consisted of heavily padded leather pants and a wool cream turtleneck (“What?! Its cold out” the Avatar had said in indignation when Asami had only laughed at the suggestion).

Kuvira shrugged with an endearing tilt of her head.

“You look alright I guess.” Asami barked out another laugh and lightly swatted at Kuvira’s arm with her purse. Kuvira playfully braced herself for the hit then rolled her eyes with a huge smile on her face.

“Asami. You look amazing. I feel like a very very lucky girl.”

Asami blushed at the unexpected compliment, her nervousness returning with a rush. Kuvira gently grabbed one of Asami’s hands and tucked it around her arm, ushering her down the dock towards where a small yacht was tied.

***

Asami took them to an elegant and quiet sushi restaurant located high above the docks. Kuvira was as courteous and thoughtful as ever, and Asami’s uncertainty melted away as they settled into the comfortable rhythm of conversation. Kuvira told her all about Zaofu, and her time with Su’s metal bending dance troupe. Asami shared more of her experiences going to school so far away from home, and they laughed at a particularly hilarious experience she had when first learning that she was attracted to women. Being able to open up and talk to someone so freely about herself was a welcome change.

After their meal they walked down the street in companionable silence. Kuvira’s hand brushed hers twice, before hesitantly hooking her pinky around Asami’s, pulling it closer so she could lace her fingers through the heiresses. Asami looked down at their joined hands then smiled up at the strong and sure woman besides her. As they walked, Asami contemplated how Kuvira’s hand felt twined with hers. It was warm and dry and big enough where Asami felt like her hand was slightly swallowed. It was different than when she held Korra’s hand. Korra’s hands while only slightly larger than Asami’s, were much more broad and calloused. She recalled how their joined hands had looked earlier that evening, and realized that seeing her pale skin starkly contrasted by Korra’s broad tan knuckles was kind of erotic. Kuvira pulled Asami from her thoughts when she gently bumped her shoulder and gestured to a bar at their right. Asami smiled guiltily. That was twice now that she had let her mind wander to the Avatar.

“Want to check this place out for a bit before we head back?”

Asami could just hear the faint tinkling sound of a live band that was playing within, and the building looked clean and respectable. She shrugged the affirmative and Kuvira smiled, gently tugging her along as they made their way across the threshold into the smoky and moderately occupied room within. It was crowded, but not overwhelmingly so, and more than half the patrons were dancing together to the fast paced music the musicians were expertly blasting into the room. It was too loud to try and continue talking, but Asami didn’t mind. Kuvira led the way to the bar, and rested her elbows on the countertop, pointedly looking for a bartender to come and take their order. Asami didn’t know if the bartender had actually seen them, or somehow could subconsciously tell that Kuvira wasn’t someone you made wait, but almost instantly Kuvira was turning to Asami with a glass of the red wine she had ordered at dinner held out in front of her.

They leaned against the bar in companionable silence, enjoying the music and the sight of the dancing patrons. Asami felt comfortable and at ease. It had been a long time since she had just gone out and enjoyed herself like this and realized at that moment just how much she had needed the break. Kuvira settled herself a little closer against the bar and casually reached her arm around Asami to rest her hand easily on the small of her back. Asami jumped a little at the contact, but at Kuvira’s questioning look, she smiled up at the metal bender in reassurance.

Asami started to zone out as she let the music swallow her in its soothing embrace. Knowing that conversation was impossible, she let her mind wander. I wonder what Korra would be like on a date, Asami found herself thinking. She looked up at Kuvira’s strong and confident profile. Probably nothing like the metal bender, Asami thought with a smile. Korra would probably be so nervous the whole time she would have made a mess of it in some way. She would have made some kind of inappropriate joke, then spent the rest of the date trying to apologize. Or maybe she would have accidently spilled something over dinner, or said something that could come across as overly assuming. Poor girl. She would take on psychotic rebels, anarchists or spirit beasts without even a second thought. Put her in a social gathering however, and the Avatar would crumble. While most didn’t understand, or got offended at Korra’s lack of social grace, Asami found it extremely endearing. She understood that Korra never meant any offense, and often times what got her in trouble was blurting out whatever came to her mind when it came to her mind. While sometimes exasperating, it was such a sharp contrast to what she had grown up with and become accustomed, that it was nearly always a welcome breath of fresh air.

Asami was thoroughly lost in her thoughts of the Avatar, when she was brought to the present abruptly by a gentle bump of her shoulder. Asami jumped, and looked up guiltily at Kuvira, sure the other woman had known what she was thinking, but the metal bender didn’t seem to have a clue as she leaned in to yell something in Asami’s ear to be heard over the loud music.

“Would you like to dance?”

That was definitely not something Korra would do. Asami frowned as she chided herself for letting her thoughts get so wrapped up in the Avatar again. She was on a date for spirits sake. She needed to start acting like it and not let her mind wander so freely to her beautiful and endearing friend back home. Instead of trying to yell back over the music, Asami nodded and pushed herself away from the bar. Kuvira smiled in response, and laced her fingers once again through Asami’s and led them both to the dance floor.

They danced to the next couple numbers. Asami was dreadfully out of practice, but was able to ease into the familiar flow and movements guided by Kuvira’s expert lead. The metal bender’s experience in a dance troupe became immediately apparent as her movements were smooth and sure and perfect. Neither of them knew the exact dance moves but were able to improvise, going off of each other’s queues. Eventually, when the band started up the next song, it was much slower than the others and Kuvira stepped forward without hesitation, placing a gentle hand on Asami’s hip. Asami looked up in surprise, momentarily irritated by Kuvira’s brazen confidence. The moment passed when the metal bender raised her eyebrows in question and Asami decided to let it go. She shrugged the affirmative and stepped forward to meet Kuvira’s body and they both began to sway in time to the gentle music in the air.

Kuvira gently lifted both of Asami’s hands until they were resting on her shoulders before confidently wrapping her own around Asami’s waist to rest one hand flat against the middle of her back, the other splayed slightly lower in the curve of Asami’s spine. Asami tried to relax into this new intimacy but found she was having more trouble than usual. Random images of Korra kept flashing through her mind sparking unfounded feelings of guilt and unease. With considerable effort, Asami pushed the conflicting thoughts from her mind and focused on the feel of the arms around her and the soft rocking of their bodies as they moved in time to the soft and sweet music. Kuvira gently rested her cheek against Asami’s temple and the heiress felt a cool breath brush across the slightly sweaty panes of her face. Asami did her best to ignore the subtle uncomfortable tightening of her stomach. What was wrong with her?

They danced together for the rest of the number but when the band started playing yet another slow song immediately after the first, Asami gently pulled away and leaned up so her mouth was even with Kuvira’s ear.

“I think I need some water.”

Kuvira nodded, and led them back off the dance floor towards the bar. Once they cleared the mass of gently swaying bodies, Asami looked at the clock. Tenzin’s beard! It was already midnight. She placed a hand on Kuvira’s shoulder to get her attention and stretched up so she could be heard.

“Actually it’s getting pretty late. Would you be alright with calling it a night?”

Kuvira looked over at the clock and frowned before nodding in agreement.

Once they were outside in the cool fresh night air, Asami sighed in relief. Knowing she was on her way back to the island immediately made her feel much better.

***

Asami and Kuvira made to back to the island around 1 in the morning. Kuvira gently helped Asami clear the gap between the hull and dock, her hands confidently spanning Asami’s waist. They walked slowly up to the main compound where the paths to their respective rooms split. After spending the evening in the city, the island felt unnaturally silent, so when they turned to say goodnight, it seemed natural that they both were whispering.

“Asami. I had a really wonderful time”, Kuvira said, lacing the fingers of both her hands around the shorter girls as she turned to face her.

Asami smiled encouragingly.

“I did too”

Kuvira took a hesitant step forward, their bodies close enough where Asami could feel the heat radiating off her larger frame, but not quite close enough where they were touching. For an inexplicable reason, Asami felt the almost overwhelming need to take a step back but managed to hold off the reaction. The moment passed, but Asami still felt the remnants of unease. There was nothing in particular that was wrong with the moment. She just wasn’t as…into it as she suspected Kuvira was. Her suspicions were confirmed when Kuvira lowered her head and rested her forehead against Asami’s and took a deep breath. Asami struggled to keep her eyes focused on the dark green orbs that hovered mere inches away from her own. Kuvira hesitantly and questioningly inched her face closer and Asami braced herself for what she knew was coming. She briefly considered stopping the advance but decided against it at the last second. Though she felt slightly uncomfortable and a little awkward, she allowed Kuvira to close the distance.

Kuvira’s lips met her own in the lightest brush of a contact before Kuvira brought their bodies even closer. Kuvira’s lips were gentle as they carefully caressed hers. She made no attempt to deepen the kiss, instead letting Asami have full control of when and if she wanted to continue, take the next step, or stop. It was soft, and sweet and careful and...boring. Asami broke the kiss feeling inexplicably disappointed, but at the metal bender’s radiant smile, she managed to give one back.

“You’re very special. I hope you know that.”

The metal bender’s words made Asami smile. Even though her feelings didn’t seem to be nearly as strong as the woman’s in front of her, it still felt good to hear someone regard her so highly. It was difficult to feel like anything out of the ordinary when constantly around the company she usually kept. It was a hard thing to feel special when your best friend was the Avatar.

“I would love to do this again if you’re open to it”

Asami smiled, but hesitated a moment before jumping in to agree. Over all, she would say the date had been a success. Pretty much every goal most had when attempting this particular milestone had been met. They had gotten to know each other better, redefined personal space and acceptable contact, and in general had had a good time throughout the entire event. So why didn’t she feel more excited at the prospect of a second? Kuvira was sweet and kind and beautiful. She treated her wonderfully and with a gentleness and consideration that even Mako hadn’t been able to quite achieve. Her hesitation made no sense. Sure, she didn’t quite feel that ‘spark’ or whatever it was, but maybe it would come with time. One thing Kuvira did do, was make her feel special and cared for in a way she hadn’t since before her father had betrayed her. No. Her doubts and reservations were silly and stupid.

“Of course” Asami said.

Kuvira smiled warmly before bending down for one last kiss. Asami was prepared this time, and closed her eyes as she tried her best to lose herself in the moment. Cut off from that one sense helped a lot, but when they pulled away and she opened her eyes to smile at the woman in front of her, she had a moment of extreme disorientation when the eyes that met hers were green, and not the blue she had been inexplicably been expecting.

“Goodnight”, Kuvira said sweetly, completely unaware of Asami’s thoughts.

Asami forced a smile, and drastically hoped it came across as sincere.

“Goodnight”, she replied.

The women parted ways, and Asami walked back to her room in a daze. The lack of sleep and couple glasses of wine were finally catching up with her. Her head felt foggy and her body was humming curiously as the last of the alcohol burned its way through her system. Just as she was passing Korra’s door she heard a soft whimper. Asami paused and strained her ears. When she heard it again, she felt her heart constrict with a painful jolt. It sounded like Korra was having another nightmare. She carefully removed her shoes and set down her purse before carefully and quietly opening the door to peek inside.

Korra was writhing in her sheets, her face pursed in fear and concentration, the occasional soft whimper and cry just barely escaping her lips. Asami quietly made her way to the bed and sat down. She gently began to rub Korra’s arms and back, softly chanting: “It’s ok. You’re ok. You’re safe.”

Korra curled in on herself with a sudden spasm and Asami quickly reached out and grabbed one of the sleeping girls hands.

“Korra. It’s ok. It’s just a dream. Relax. Shhhhh. You’re ok”

Korra gripped Asami’s fingers until it was almost painful, but thankfully began to relax as she slowly opened her eyes. Without warning, she hastily bolted up and looked around, her eyes wide with confusion and fear. She looked wild and scared as she winced in pain and panted heavily, scanning her surroundings for whatever threat had just been tormenting her. Asami noted with a painful twist that tears were tracking their way down the darker girls face and reached up to place a comforting hand on the Avatar’s shoulder to pull her close, resting her forehead reassuringly against Korra’s damp sweaty one. She slid her hand up to cradle the soft spot where Korra’s neck met her ear burying her fingers in her damp hair, and the Avatar turned her face into the contact, reached up a clammy hand and grasped Asami’s wrist, holding on as though it were her only anchor on a vast expanse of fear and uncertainty. 

“Shhhh. You’re safe. It’s ok”

Korra’s panting breath washed over Asami in a dizzying wave and for a moment, she didn’t know who was holding on to who. 

It took a while for Korra to calm down enough to realize that she wasn’t in immediate danger. When it settled in that she was safe and secure in her room, Korra’s body slumped and she let herself fall back to the bed. She was still breathing heavily, and Asami could see the thin sheen of sweat that covered the other girl’s skin. Her hair was matted in sweaty clumps around her face, and Asami had to resist the urge to reach out and brush them away. Korra threw an arm across her forehead. Asami knew it was to try and hide the fact that she had been crying. They sat in silence as Korra slowed her breathing, but she never released her death grip on Asami’s hand.

“Did I wake you up?” Korra asked, her soft voice broken and hoarse.

“No. I heard you on the way back to my room. It’s ok.”

Korra turned onto her side with her lower back pressed against Asami’s thigh. She pulled Asami’s hand closer to her chest and she could faintly feel the steady (if slightly fast) beating of Korra’s heart against the back of her fingers. Asami reached up with her free hand and resumed rubbing the Korra’s back with long, sure and steady strokes.

“You have a good time?”

Asami nodded.

“Yeah. It was nice…I missed you though”

The words slipped out before Asami realized what she had said. She flinched and went still, wishing she could take the words back. Why on earth had she said that? Asami felt Korra’s body stiffen for brief moment, but then she relaxed more fully into the bed, pressing her back even more into Asami’s leg. A small smile slowly formed in the corner of the Avatar’s mouth as she closed her eyes, gently gripping Asami’s hand a little tighter. Korra curled into a more comfortable position that exposed a little more of her back so Asami could have less restricted access as her hand trailed up and down the smaller girls torso.

Asami watched as Korra’s body continued to relax. The hand curled around her own slowly slackened, and Korra’s face softened as she slipped back to sleep. Asami breathed a sigh of relief as her comment was gone unanswered and slipped her hand out of the Avatar’s as she gave into the temptation to gently brush the back of her fingers across Korra’s cheek and clear the sweaty hair off her brow. Korra made a soft sound in the back of her throat, and Asami’s hand stilled. She was pushing it and she knew it. With a sigh of resignation, Asami stood. As she turned to leave the room, a soft voice froze her in place.

“I missed you too”, Korra mumbled.

Asami waited for Korra to say anything else, slowly turning to glance at the still figure behind her, however the Avatar looked to be fast asleep. Korra looked so beautiful and peaceful that Asami felt a slight ache at the sudden overwhelming urge to crawl beneath the covers along side her. Shaking the impossible thoughts out of her head, Asami left the room, closing the door carefully and quietly behind her.


	8. Chapter 8

Korra

There was a soft knock on the door, and Korra called out her permission to enter. When the door creaked open, Korra’s face split into a grin when she saw a flash of green eyes and raven hair.

“Hey,” Asami said as she sat down on the bed. “You sleep okay?”

“Actually, yes… Sorry about that by the way,” Korra finished sheepishly.

Either she was imagining things, or she saw the flash of a blush creep across Asami’s cheeks. Korra couldn’t tell for sure though because her friend dipped her head at the comment, thoroughly obscuring her face by a veil of thick hair.

“No, it’s okay. I’m glad I was able to help.”

Asami tried to give Korra an encouraging smile, but her eyes were heavily lined with worry.

“The nightmares are still that bad?”

The dreams that plagued Korra regularly had been absolutely terrifying. Over and over, she relived the experience of waking up chained and helpless. While the details sometimes varied, the dreams always ended the same way. The poison would rip through her skin and everything would go black.

Last night, the Red Lotus acolyte had just bended the silver concoction out of its stone bowl when a gentle and soothing hand and soft words of reassurance had pulled her consciousness from the dreams embrace. Waking with Asami’s face only inches from hers had grounded her and chased the shadows of the dream into the far reaches of her mind. Asami’s calm and comforting presence had banished the remnants of the dream quicker and more efficiently than any remedy Tenzin and Kya had ever attempted.

Korra remembered little of Asami’s nighttime visit other than the profound relief the other girls presence had given her. With Asami holding her hand and rubbing her back she felt safe, and the sleep Korra had eased back into had been more restful than she had experienced in weeks.  
Korra slowly and carefully pulled herself into a sitting position.

“I’ll be okay. I didn’t… hurt you, though,” she trailed off, biting her lip in worry. “Did I?”

Asami seemed genuinely confused by the question until Korra gestured to Asami’s wrist. Korra felt her heart sink when she noticed there were indeed a row of slightly bluish dots along the back of her forearm. Asami looked down with a frown.

“I honestly wouldn’t have even noticed if it weren’t for you pointing them out.”

When Asami looked back up and saw the mortification on Korra’s face, she hastily reached out and placed a comforting hand on Korra’s shoulder. Asami’s hand was cool on Korra’s flushed, bare skin.

“Hey, it’s okay.” Asami cracked a smile. “You’ve given me worse bruises when we used to spar. This is nothing.”

Asami’s words made Korra feel a little better, but what truly calmed the Avatar was the light touch on her shoulder. Korra had never been one to initiate excess physical contact. She was fine with hugging and, of course, had no problem whatsoever punching someone when they deserved it... But for comfort? Asami seemed to be the exception to her rule. Few things had as calming effect on the high strung Avatar as Asami’s touch.

Asami slid her hand down Korra’s arm until she was gently clasping her hand. “Let’s get you up. Are you hungry?”

Korra looked down at the thin and delicate fingers between her own. Yep. She was definitely more than okay with Asami touching her.

Weird.

Korra considered the question as Asami stood and helped ease her out of the bed and into her chair.

“I think so. Yeah.”

Asami smiled in delight. Korra usually put up much more of a fight when it came to eating anything, but she felt in very high spirits and her stomach had begun to growl at the thought of breakfast.

***

Asami wheeled her out into the hallway and turned towards the quiet and private room Korra had insisted she take her meals in ever since returning to the island. She hated the looks of pity and concern everyone always gave her, so she had intentionally limited her interaction with the other inhabitants of the island to a bare minimum. She guessed Tenzin and the others had also warned everyone else away as well for she couldn’t even recall the last time she had seen Ikki nor Meelo. She reached up a hand to lie it gently on Asami’s where it gripped the back of her chair. Asami jumped at the contact and looked down at her questioningly.

“Can we eat in the main dining room?”

Asami blinked in shock. “Are… are you sure?”

“Yeah...” Korra paused for a moment to catch her breath. Just those few words she’d spoken seemed to have lifted a weight off her chest she hadn’t even known was there. “I think I am.”  
Asami looked at Korra for a moment longer, her brows knit in an expression Korra couldn’t identify.

“I don’t know. I think I just... kinda miss everybody. We don’t... have to if you don’t want to…”

Asami’s gaze softened into a smile, and she wordlessly turned them around.

After Meelo spilled bison milk not once, not twice, but three times over Korra’s lap in his excitement, Korra was earnestly wondering what on earth she’d thought she was missing. The lack of peace? The insanity? Food all over her clothes? Ikki had literally been bouncing up and down all breakfast, and twice Meelo had caused Korra to drop her chopsticks due to the fact that he was climbing all over the wheels and back of her chair. Asami looked a little overwhelmed as well, but seeing as the kids were mostly focusing their energy at Korra, she was spared most of the spills.

Just as Meelo was zooming his way around the room for the fourth time, one of the stone blocks of the floor suddenly popped out of the ground. The hyperactive airbender crashed into the unexpected roadblock with a strangely satisfying “OOMPH!” and slid dramatically to the floor. There were enough earth benders in the room for it to be impossible to know who the culprit was, but Korra couldn’t help but burst out laughing at the glaring look the small child gave to the green clad individuals in the room.

Crazy airbender children and bison milk baths aside, Korra was in a great mood as she enjoyed her first meal with the rest of her “family” since she had returned from her near death experience. Even Kuvira’s presence among the other earthbenders wasn’t bringing her down.

“It’s very nice to have you join us, Korra,” Kya said with a wry twist of her lips as she bent some water out of her glass to - once again - help clean up the Avatar’s sodden pajamas.

“Yeah! We really missed you,” Ikki chimed in.

Korra nodded at Kya in thanks before smiling warmly at the young airbender sitting to her right.

“I missed you too, Ikki.” Korra couldn’t help but laugh at the huge grin that spread across the little girls face.

Ikki turned to her father and crossed her arms. “See, Dad? I told you Korra hadn’t forgotten how to laugh. How can someone forget how to laugh?”

Tenzin blushed in embarrassment and rounded on his youngest daughter. “I didn’t say- What I meant was-”

Pema placed a hand on her husband’s arm and turned to Korra with a smile. “It’s just nice to see you smiling again, dear. We’ve all been hoping to see more of your old self.”

Korra felt suddenly overwhelmed at the warm sentiments and bowed her head. She knew everyone was worried about her, but mostly just assumed they all felt pity at her inability to walk and bend and were anxious to have their Avatar back. Asami placed a comforting hand on her shoulder and came to her rescue by filling the silence.

“We’re just taking it one day at a time.”

Korra looked up in gratitude at her friend, and Asami smiled back with warmth and compassion in her eyes.

Pema stood and gestured for Ikki’s and Meelo’s attention. “Alright, kids. I think it’s time you go play outside. Give poor Korra a rest.”

Both kids groaned in unison and dramatically slumped their shoulders as they filed out of the room, and Korra shot Pema a grateful look. Pema smiled with a wink and closed the door behind the airbending terrors.

“You survived,” Asami whispered, as she leaned in conspiratorially.

“Barely,” Korra muttered back.

“Su told me about the talk you two had the other day,” Tenzin said. He had regained his composure and was back to his stiff-backed self.

Korra was still looking at Asami as Tenzin said the words and watched as Asami’s eyes flashed over to the metal bender with a curious expression on her face. She looked almost… embarrassed? No. Panicked? Both? Korra tore her eyes from Asami’s face as she turned to answer her old master.

“Yeah. She thinks that the reason I can’t walk is that there’s still some of the poison in my body,” Korra said by way of explanation to the curious faces looking her way.

Out of the corner of her eye she saw Asami sigh in what looked strangely like relief. What had Asami thought she was going to say?

“That actually makes a lot of sense,” Kya said with a thoughtful pursing of her lips. “I mean, I know she was hurt, but I’ve been having a hard time believing that even my healing would have so little-”

“Can you help her?” Asami interrupted, leaning towards Su with an urgency that warmed Korra’s heart. She seemed to be over whatever it was that had bothered her and was looking at Su with hope shining strongly in her eyes.

Su looked at Asami in confusion. Korra realized that it probably seemed strange that this was the first Asami was hearing about all of this, but in light of the events of the past couple days, Korra had forgotten all about filling her friend in.

“She doesn’t think she can. But she’s going to try and find Toph to see if maybe the original metal bender can do something,” Korra explained.

Su nodded in agreement. “The particles in Korra’s system are just too small for me to be able to bend. When I examined her, I was barely able to feel anything in the first place. However, I radioed some of her usual haunts yesterday, and I think I may have found my mother.”

Asami’s excitement at the news rivaled Korra’s as she leaned forward, jostling the table in her enthusiasm. Korra warily eyed the tipping cup and reached out, just managing to catch one of the only cups of bison milk in the near vicinity that hadn’t already found its way onto her lap.

“That’s amazing! How long do you think it will be?”

Su smiled at Asami’s enthusiasm, but when she responded, it was to Korra. “As soon as I have any news, I’ll make sure to tell you immediately.”

Korra looked up at the sound of a chair scraping against the stone floor.

“Thank you for the breakfast,” Kuvira said with a bow. Though the Captain still had her usual countenance of confidence and calm, Korra could see that the corners of the metal benders mouth were pulled down in the tiniest hint of a frown.

“I am going to go meet with my lieutenants and make sure everything is in order. Su. Tenzin. I will see you at the War Counsel.”

“War Counsel? Did something happen?” Korra asked.

Though it had been a while since she had heard any update on the Earth Kingdom situation, she had just assumed that meant nothing had really changed.

Su and Tenzin shared a look that made Korra extremely uneasy before Su turned and met Korra’s stare from across the table.

“We’ve just been discussing the logistics of the plan we have decided on for dealing with the riots in the Earth Kingdom.”

“Don’t you think someone should have told me about this?” Korra asked in shock. She knew she had been out of the loop, but the idea of everyone deciding on a plan of action without at least telling her about it bothered her deeply.

While Su seemed ignorant to the effect this revelation had caused Korra, Tenzin obviously was not. He turned to Korra.

“Now Korra... The most important thing for you to do is to focus on your recovery and wellbeing. We thought-”

“Tenzin, I’m the Avatar.” Korra interrupted. “The most important thing for me to do is to help the Earth Kingdom... in whatever way I can.”

“And what, exactly, is it you believe you can do to help the Earth Kingdom in your present condition?” Kuvira snapped.

She slowly turned her head to look at the Captain, rage and disbelief welling in her chest with a staggering velocity.

“Excuse me?”

“I’m just wondering what you’re thinking you can accomplish,” Kuvira clarified boldly.

Korra felt like she had been punched in the stomach. The ensuing silence was almost oppressive, and everyone’s eyes were widened in shock. You could have heard a pin drop.

Asami placed a comforting and calming hand on Korra’s arm and squeezed. The touch banked the tidal wave rising within her, but only enough to curb the string of insults that were resting anxiously on the tip of her tongue. Korra took a deep breath and leveled her gaze on the metal bender across the room. Kuvira looked passive and calm, but Korra could detect the glint of something almost malicious in her eyes.

“Unless you have a specific reason you don’t want me to go the meeting, I can’t see why my condition is an issue. This fight is just as much mine as it is anyone else’s. Probably even more so. It is my right and responsibility to take part in this in whatever way possible, and if all I can do right now is sit in a meeting and voice my opinion, then that’s what I’ll do.”

Korra looked pointedly at Su and Tenzin.

“I know I haven’t been much use lately, but that doesn’t mean it’s okay to exclude me from this. If you’re having meetings in which you are deciding to move forward, I want to know about it.”

Surprisingly, it was Kuvira who was the first to respond.

“I’m sorry, Avatar Korra,” she said with a slight bow. “I meant no disrespect.”

Korra raised her eyebrows in skepticism.

“Really.” It wasn’t a question.

Almost immediately, her suspicions were proven correct.

“It was my understanding that you had ceased attending any meetings concerning the problems in the Earth Kingdom due to your fragile state.”

Dear Spirits! Was this woman intentionally trying to set her off? Korra felt the control on her anger start to slip. Just when we opened her mouth to reply, the hand on her arm gave another sharp squeeze. Korra looked up and found a pair of jade eyes flashing a warning. Korra understood the message.

Asami obviously knew she was at a point where anything that came out of her mouth would probably only make things worse. Instead of telling Kuvira exactly what she’d like to do in her ‘fragile state’, Korra took a deep breath. Asami’s eyes warmed in relief before she turned to the rest of the room.

“Obviously Korra is doing much better, and I think it’s safe to say that she isn’t too fragile to handle sitting in a meeting and voicing her opinion. If this Toph solution actually works, she’ll be back on her feet very soon, and I think everyone can agree that it would be a good idea for our Avatar to have a grasp on the situation before then.”

There was steel in Asami’s voice that Korra rarely heard, and Kuvira seemed to notice it as well. Korra looked over at Kuvira in smug satisfaction and waited anxiously for whatever argument the metal bender was going to try and make.

Kuvira looked at Asami, and something unidentifiable flashed across her face before she bowed her head in respect.

“Of course. I hadn’t considered that. You are absolutely right, Miss Sato. The Avatar is absolutely welcome to join any and all efforts.”

Korra frowned at Kuvira’s sudden change in stance. What in the helluvit kind of friendship did she with Asami have that a small argument from Miss Sato would have such an effect?

She looked up at Asami, but the heiress gave no indication she thought anything was out of the ordinary. Instead, the heiress gave Kuvira a friendly nod.

Kuvira turned to the rest of the room. “Thank you again for breakfast, Master Tenzin. I will see you all shortly.”

With one last shallow bow, the Captain exited the room.

Korra was only able to release her pent up breath once Kuvira had cleared the room and shut the door behind her.

“I don’t like her,” Korra growled.

Asami sighed and finally removed her hand from Korra’s arm. “Korra. You know nothing about her.”

“I don’t need to!” Korra replied in exasperation, looking around for a sympathetic face. However, all she was met with was a uniform sea of frowns.

“Kuvira has been very instrumental in our efforts to control this situation,” Tenzin said, his voice calm and steady. “She has done nothing but provide unwavering support in our efforts to manage this crisis.”

Korra shook her head. “No. There’s something not right about her. I can feel it. What do we even really know about her?”

This time it was Su who spoke up. “Kuvira can be a bit… direct, I’ll give you that. But I have known that woman for a very long time. I would trust her with my life.”

“I know you guys got off on the wrong foot, but I think you should give her a chance,” Asami piped in.

Korra rounded on Asami with wide eyes. “You’re going to take her side, too?”

Asami eyes flashed, but that was the only sign that the heiress was anything other than the calm and collected image she portrayed.

“Why do you think we are on different sides? We all want the same thing.”

“I told you! Something’s... not right.”

“If she wasn’t on our side, why would she have saved your father’s life?” Su asked.

“All I know is- wait. What?”

Su’s words sunk in, and her explosive anger deflated in a dizzying rush leaving her frustrated and confused.

Korra whipped her head around the room searching for answers in the sea of silence around her.

“Korra, when your father was thrown off the cliff that day you were captured by Zaheer, Kuvira was the one who caught him. Now I realize the Captain may have said a few things that set you off, but I can assure you there is nothing nefarious about Kuvira. She’s been on our side from the beginning,” Tenzin explained.

Korra closed her eyes while she tried to process this new information. There was something about Kuvira that set Korra on edge, and she wanted so badly to feel vindicated, but she couldn’t ignore this new piece of evidence. Kuvira had saved her father’s life. How could she hate and distrust the woman who had saved her father’s life?

No. Asami was right. She didn’t know Kuvira, and it was very clear that everyone else around her did. They all trusted her. Asami trusted her. Though it caused a painful twist in her stomach, she owed it to her friend to trust her judgement.

Taking a deep breath, Korra opened her eyes and met the expectant gaze of everyone in the room.

“Alright. I’m sorry. I was wrong. I’m sorry if I offended anyone.”

Su smiled and Tenzin gave Korra a nod of respect, however Korra barely noticed as she watched for the only reaction that really mattered.

Asami was frowning, but by the way her eyes were glazed over, Korra suspected that the expression was not meant for her. Shaking herself from whatever deep thought she had been submerged in, Asami drew in a quick and deep breath and released it in a rush. She reached out and laid a soft hand on the plane of Korra’s cheek and smiled. However, when she focused her eyes on Korra, they were tinged with sadness, and she would have given anything at that moment to know why.

“Thank you, Korra.”

When she removed her hand, Korra felt as though half her body heat left with it.

***

Asami rolled Korra back to her room in silence. Once inside, Asami helped her out of her chair so she could sit on the bed. When Asami started to walk away, Korra reached out and grabbed one of her hands and pulled her down.

“I feel like all I’ve been doing is apologizing to you lately. But I’ll say it again. I’m sorry about... this morning.”

Asami rubbed her hair out of her face and leaned forward so she was resting her elbows on her knees. “No. This one I understand. I know you Korra. I know that the things Kuvira said hit a nerve. I’m actually pretty proud of you.”

Korra started in surprise. “You are?”

“I can only imagine the things you wanted to say when she made her comments. But you didn’t. That was really good.”

Korra sighed dramatically and let herself fall back onto the bed, throwing her arms out to the side.

“Yeah. It was really really hard, though... She pissed me off.”

Asami laughed and reached over to rub Korra’s knee. “I know.”

“How long do we have until the meeting?” Korra asked.

The events of the morning had made Korra extremely anxious, and she desperately wanted some time to calm down and steady her nerves.

“A couple hours. Do you want me to leave you alone?”

“No,” Korra replied without hesitation. “Please, stay.”

“Oh,” Asami said in a small voice. “Okay.”

They sat in silence while Korra did her best to try and relax. The revelation that Kuvira was her father’s savior had rocked her more than she was willing to admit. It seemed strange that no one had told her.

“Did you know?”

Asami looked down in question.

“Did you know that Kuvira saved my fathers life?”

Asami’s eyes glazed over as she shook her head. “No. I didn’t.”

Asami took a deep breath and released it on a sigh as she lowered herself until she was lying next to Korra on the bed. Her head landed on Korra’s bicep, but when she immediately started to sit back up, Korra hastily grabbed onto Asami’s shoulder.

“It’s okay. I don’t mind.”

Asami looked at Korra with pursed brows as she propped herself up on her elbow and hovered slightly over Korra’s side.

Korra scrambled for a way to justify the proximity and felt her cheeks slowly start to burn. She had never had a close girl friend before and guessed that she had just crossed some line.

“I just… feel better when you’re close. I’m sorry. I know... it’s weird. You don’t have to. I just… you just… never mind…”

Asami continued to stare down at her, and Korra’s stomach tightened in a sudden rush of anxiety. For a second it looked like Asami was going to say something, but instead she lowered herself back down so she was laying on her side, pillowing her head with the crook of her arm. The fingers of her other hand were resting easily against Korra’s shoulder, and just that little bit of contact was enough to settle her nerves.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to be sorry,” Asami replied softly.

“It just helps having you around,” Korra continued, feeling as though it were very important that she explain her self.

“Korra. It’s okay.”

“You sure?” Korra asked, turning her head to look at the prone woman next to her. When she did, her stomach did a funny flip-flop as she realized how extremely close Asami’s face was to hers.

Korra could feel Asami’s steady breath against her face, and every puff of air caused her stomach to clench in a weird though not quite uncomfortable way. Asami’s eyes were soft as she smiled, but that sadness Korra had noticed earlier was back. Asami gently squeezed Korra’s bicep before turning onto her back with a sigh, pillowing her head on the soft spot where Korra’s shoulder melded into her chest.

“I’m sure, Korra. I’m glad I can help.”

Asami’s hair draped across the curve of Korra’s throat and tickled her nose. Korra lifted her hand and was about to twist a strand between her fingers before she realized what she was doing. To cover the true intent behind the movement, she rubbed her eye with her thumb and tried to remember what it was they’d been talking about.

Having Asami this close to her absolutely helped ease her nerves, and it also seemed to have the interesting side effect of making her completely forget about everything else. Her stomach had yet to cease its dance of flip-flips, and everywhere Asami’s skin was touching hers had started to tingle. A distant part of Korra’s mind was confused and worried about this weird reaction she was having, but most of her just hoped the other girl didn’t decide to get up.

“Do you really feel up to going to this war counsel?” Asami asked, breaking the silence that had settled over the room. She rolled herself back onto her side, but was still using Korra’s arm as a pillow. If possible, their faces were even closer, and Korra had to close her eyes at the onslaught feelings the heightened proximity suddenly flared. The feelings were both exciting and terrifying, and Korra had no idea what any of it meant. With considerable effort, Korra wrangled her thoughts to the question Asami had just asked.

“I don’t know. I kind of feel like I have to.”

“I hope you know no one expects you to.”

“No. I need to go. I want to feel like... I’m actually doing something. I need this.”

Asami nodded in understanding.

The movement caused a tug around Korra’s fingers, and she realized she had absentmindedly been playing with Asami’s hair without even realizing it. She dropped the silky strands and let her hand drop back to the bed.

Korra opened one eye and looked down. Asami’s eyes were closed as well, and she was smiling sweetly.

“Do you really trust her?”

“Hmm?”

“Kuvira.”

Asami took a deep breath. For a moment, she didn’t think Asami was going to answer at all, but all thoughts of her question fled her mind when Asami inched a little closer until their bodies were pressed together from hip to shoulder.

“Korra?”

“Yeah?”

“Can we just lay here for a bit and not talk?”

Korra breathed out a short laugh. “Yeah.”

“Thank you.”


	9. chapter 9

Asami

“Do you really trust her?”

“Hmm?”

“Kuvira.”

Asami held in the frustrated groan that was bubbling at the back of her throat.  
If there was one person she desperately didn’t want to think about in this moment, it was Kuvira. Not when she was laying so close and intimately with Korra. Before she could lose her nerve, Asami inched closer until she could feel the contours of Korra’s body pressed against hers.

“Korra?”

“Yeah.”

“Can we just lay here for a bit and not talk?”

Korra laughed and the vibrations reverberated through Asami’s chest and down into her core.

“Yeah.”

“Thank you.”

A voice in the back of Asami’s mind was screaming at her for being so foolish and stupid, but she forced it down so she could just enjoy herself a moment longer. Asami could hear Korra’s steady heartbeat from where her head was pillowed on the Avatar’s chest, and the steady thumping was like music to her ears. Korra had reached up and was idly twisting Asami’s hair through her fingers again. Her hipbone was also pressing lightly into Asami’s lower abdomen.

The moment would have been perfect, if not for the fact that she was in a constant battle with guilt as it tried to claw its way to the surface. She felt guilty for how much she was enjoying the feel of Korra’s body pressed against her own. She felt guilty for feeling this way after having kissed someone else the night before. Mostly she felt guilty because she was getting so much enjoyment out of her friends desire for comfort. Asami felt dirty and wrong. It was this particular strand of guilt that eventually proved to be too much.

Asami lifted herself up from where she had been cradled in Korra’s arm and sat at the edge of the bed. The feeling of loss as the distance between them increased was so acute, Asami felt her eyes sting with the beginning of tears. Before it could escalate further, she took a deep and steadying breath and stood.

“Are you okay?” Korra asked, her voice thick with concern.

Asami squeezed her eyes shut and released her breath in a rush before forcing a smile and turned to Korra.

“Yeah. I’m okay. I just need to start getting ready.” She gestured to her pajamas and robe. “Can’t go to a war meeting dressed like this.”

She tried to sell the joke with a nervous laugh, but it sounded so faked even to her own ears that she quickly turned her head and winced.

When she turned back, Korra had worked herself up until she was propped up on her elbows, tilting her head slightly to the side. Her bangs slid over until they slightly obscured one of her eyes and she was worriedly biting her lower lip. Asami almost swore aloud at the resonating pang that shot through her core.

“I’m just… I’m gonna go,” Asami stammered, absently jerking her thumb in the direction of the door.

Korra opened her mouth, but Asami cut her off.

“I’ll send Kya in to help you get dressed. I just… yeah.” She slipped out the door, pausing to peek her head back in one last time. “I’ll pick you up for the meeting later.”

Asami shut the door behind her and slumped against the hard surface. She curbed the impulse to bang her head back against the wood, but only because she knew Korra would hear and be worried. Asami’s chest ached at the sad irony of their situation. Sweet, innocent and sheltered Korra was seeking comfort in her secretly bisexual best friend who may or may not be in love with her.

This was getting to be a little too much. Asami’s feelings for Korra had been easy to manage when the Avatar was being moody and depressed. What she’d encountered this morning was an entirely different story.

She needed to get over this. Somehow, she needed to get the Avatar out of her head. She’d rather have unrequited feelings than lose Korra as a friend altogether, and if things kept going as they were, Asami was going to screw it up.

***

Asami picked Korra up several hours later. Asami had used the time to calm herself down and, thankfully, when she opened the door to Korra’s room, the only indication the Avatar gave in reference to Asami’s strange behavior was a concerned glance as Kya helped her into her chair.

Asami took over manning Korra’s chair as they began their journey to the airship that was going to take them into the city. The silence was a little heavier than usual between the two friends, but Asami couldn’t think of any way to fill it. Every time she looked down at Korra’s bare shoulders, all she could think of was how comfortable and soft Korra’s skin had been as she had been nestled in the crook of her arm. Korra seemed lost in thought as well and did nothing to try and fill the silence either.

Once they were on the airship, Asami was relieved of the tension as Tenzin and Su came over to begin filling them in on what had been occurring throughout the kingdom. Asami let her mind wander and before she knew it, the ship had docked, and they were all making their way over to the international meeting room the president had offered as headquarters for all efforts involving the Earth Kingdom crisis.

Asami was about to roll Korra into the room when she heard her name called out. When she turned around, a short man in glasses was running towards her down the hall.

“Miss Sato! I had hoped to run into you.” The squat man, obviously an aid of some sorts, drew level with Asami and her friends. In his hand was clutched a folded piece of paper which he immediately held out for Asami to take.

“Word had it that you were going to be joining the Avatar at the war counsel today, and I was asked to give you this.”

Asami unfolded the paper and quickly scanned the contents. It was from her Vice President at Future Industries, and he was hoping they could have a meeting. Asami felt guilty as she read the pleading tone in the note. Ever since Korra had been injured, Asami had nearly neglected her company in favor of taking care of her friend. While she would take the occasional phone call and returned letters as frequently as she could, it had been weeks since she had visited the factory or attended any meetings.

When Asami looked up, Korra reached out and laid a soft hand on her arm.

“Don’t worry about it, Asami. Just go. I’ll fill you in on everything later.”

Asami bit her lip in indecision. It was really important that she checked up on her company, but she was a little worried about not being there to support Korra during the meeting.

“Are you sure?” Asami asked.

Korra smiled warmly and nodded her head.

“Hey. This is my job. You have yours. I’ll see you after.”

Before Asami had the chance to respond, Korra nodded up at Tenzin. Tenzin stepped forward and took over manning Korra’s chair as she wheeled them both into the room. Korra looked over her shoulder one last time and gave Asami an encouraging smile before the door was closed behind her. With the matter settled, Asami turned and walked away to go deal with her company.

***

A little over two hours later, Asami was leaving the factory. She had worked furiously to settle disputes, sign papers, and double check order forms. She approved blueprints for prototypes, and made adjustments as she saw fit. For the most part, everything was running smoothly, and for that Asami was grateful. By the end, she was exhausted. 

Just as she was opening the door to her Satomobile, a hand landed on her shoulder. Asami didn’t think. She only reacted. In one swift move, she grabbed the hand and ducked, pivoting her hips as she twisted so as to wrench the offending wrist in an unnatural position and caused the other person to drop to the floor in pain.

“UNCLE! UNCLE!” Asami heard a familiar voice cry out.

“Mako?” Asami said, noting once her hair had swung out of the way that she recognized spasming figure on the floor beneath her. She hastily released the wrist, and Mako slowly rolled himself to his feet, rubbing his hand with an offended look on his face.

“What the heck, Asami? I just wanted to say hi,” Mako said. Though his tone was scolding, Asami knew him well enough to detect the hint of humor.

Asami laughed and stepped forward to hug her friend in a tight embrace.

“Sorry, Mako. Can never be too careful.”

Mako grunted but was equally enthusiastic when he hugged her back.

Asami was grateful that everything had settled between them. After the awkward situation they had all been in, it had taken Mako a while to relax around her. While Asami’s feelings for the firebender had ran the gamut, ranging from what she had thought was love, to irritation and hurt, she now viewed him as one of her closest friends and would readily trust him with her life.

“Nice to see you too,” Mako said with a wry twist of his lips.

“How’d you know I was here?” Asami asked in confusion.

“I actually followed you here to write you a speeding ticket, but I guess I’ll let that slide. Been waiting for you to get out ever since.”

Asami laughed. “Why thank you, officer,” she said with a silly and over the top bow.

Mako nodded back with his most curt and cop like expression. “Just dont let it happen again ma’am.”

Both started laughing. Asami opened her door and gestured to the passenger side. “Korra’s in a war meeting, and I don’t know how long it’s going to last. I’m headed back to the Capitol Building. You should join me. I’m sure Korra would be very happy to see you.”

Mako smiled and nodded, walking over to the passenger side of the Satomobile.

They sat in silence while Asami navigated the vehicle away from the factory and onto the busy streets of Republic City. It was a short drive to the Capitol Building, and Asami could have walked, but she missed driving and relished the few opportunities she got.

“So… How’s she doing?” Mako finally asked.

Asami looked over and raised an eyebrow. “You know, if you came by the island every once in a while you could see for yourself.”

Mako looked down and twisted his hands nervously in his lap. “You know I would… But work, and… you know… stuff.”

Asami continued looking at him, letting the firebender squirm for a little longer. Mako had initially been by the island nearly every day, but as Korra’s mood had steadily plummeted, Mako had slowly weaned his visits to a bare minimum. It had been nearly two weeks since he had last made his way over, and though Asami couldn’t entirely blame him, she was still a little irritated that he had allowed Korra to feel so abandoned by her friends.

When Asami didn’t let up on her pointed stare, Mako slumped his shoulders and let out his breath in a rush.

“I know. I’m an ass. She’s just been so…”

“Bitchy?”

“I was gunna say difficult, but that works too,” Mako said with a shrug.

Asami snorted. “She’s actually doing better. We also may know why she has been taking so long to heal, so there’s a light at the end of the tunnel, and her attitude has been a little better.”

Mako looked over with raised brows. “This doesn’t have anything to do with Toph, does it?”

Asami nearly jerked the car off the road in her surprise. “It does, actually. Why do you ask?”

“Lin was in an unusual mood today. Got sent on traffic duty for telling her good morning. Then I overhead the Captain talking about how ‘excited’ she was about her mother coming to visit.”

Asami’s heart pounded painfully in her chest in her overwhelming excitement. “Mako! That’s amazing. When did Lin say she was going to be here?”

“Well, from the sound of it, I think she should arrive later this evening.”

Asami couldn’t believe their luck. When Su had said she had possibly found her mother, she didn’t dare to hope that the metal bender would be arriving so soon.

“Why do you guys need Toph?” Mako asked.

Asami explained Su’s guess as to Korra’s limited progress, and at the end Mako was every bit as excited as Asami.

***

They continued to chat easily as Asami arrived at the Capitol, and they both made their way to the international meeting room. The door was still closed, and Asami guessed the meeting was still in session. She was just deciding whether or not to slip inside or wait by the door when she heard a familiar loud voice from within. A very angry loud voice. Mako and Asami shared a look of concern before Asami opened the door and peered inside. What she saw made her stomach twist in anxiety.

Korra and Kuvira were at it again, but this time, the Avatar was losing the battle of controlling her temper, and Kuvira wasn’t faring much better. Tenzin heard the door open and looked over at Asami with a pleading look in his eyes. She stepped further inside with and surveyed the havoc that was within.

It was extremely clear that the dislike between the two women was very mutual. It didn’t matter what point one made. The other would contradict.

“Avatar Korra. You haven’t seen the devastation first hand. You have no idea how dire this situation truly is,” Kuvira said, slamming her fist on the table for emphasis. “The only clear option that will be most effectual is to impose nationwide martial law. Subdividing the kingdom into a set of heavily regulated camps is the only choice.”

“Making these camps necessary is only going to make things worse!” Korra yelled back. “You weren’t here during the Equalist Revolution. Tarlock thought the same thing, and look how that turned out!”

Kuvira crossed her arms across her chest and pinched the bridge of her nose in frustration.

“This is a completely different situation. Which you would know, if YOU HAVE SEEN IT!” Kuvira yelled back.

Korra threw up her hands with a grunt before whirling on Tenzin.

“C’mon, Tenzin! Back me up here!”

Tenzin squirmed uncomfortably in his chair. While Korra was still a shadow of her usual self, the water tribe girl was pretty terrifying when she was angry. 

“It would only be a temporary, Korra.” the airbender said. “The crime rate is getting out of hand. Murders are a daily occurrence and no one feels safe.”

“Then make it optional!” Korra yelled back.

Kuvira opened her mouth for a retort when Su softly cleared her throat.

“I think enough has been discussed today. It’s clear we are not all on the same page, and I think it would be best if we take a break to think about everything a little longer.”

There was a collective sigh of relief throughout the room. Kuvira and Korra glared angrily at each other for a moment longer before Kuvira turned to Su and gave her a curt nod. She then hastily grabbed the stack of papers in front of her and walked out the door on the far side of the room, slamming it with unnecessary force behind her. 

Asami nodded for Mako to follow, and fully entered the room, walking over to where Korra sat. Korra was almost shaking with anger and rage, and when Asami looked over her shoulder at Mako, the firebender’s eyes were wide with fear. He put up both hands and shook his head as he slowly backed away. Asami rolled her eyes and sat in the vacant chair to the Avatar’s right.

Korra’s hands were balled into fists where they lay resting on the table and her whole body was humming with tension. Asami reached out and gently rested her hand atop one of Korra’s fists. The Avatar jumped a little at the contact and looked over sharply. Her face was twisted in frustration, but Asami did her best to not be affected. She rubbed her thumb along the backs of Korra’s taut knuckles, and eventually Asami could see some of the tension easing out of the smaller girls body. Korra’s face softened, but she was still frowning. 

“Your friend is an idiot,” Korra growled.

Asami frowned. “You just have different opinions. This is a tough situation.”

“Yeah, well, her opinions are wrong.”

Korra had loosed her hand from its fist and was loosely twining her fingers through Asami’s. She gently began to rub her thumb along the length of the heiresses’ long, elegant fingers. As soon as Asami became aware, the touch started sending tingles up her arm, so she gently removed her hand and stood.

“Let’s go home,” Asami said with a soft smile.

Korra looked up with a slight frown then reluctantly bowed her head with a nod.

As they rolled by Mako, Korra reached out and lightly punched his leg.

“Hello to you, too, Inspector. I’d almost forgotten what your frown looked like.”

Mako jumped and reached up to rub the back of his neck, a blush creeping past the neckline of his shirt.

“Oh. Hi, Korra. Sorry…I-”

“Just shut up and open the door.”

Mako grimaced. Asami couldn’t help but laugh as he hastily ran over and opened the door so she could wheel the feisty Avatar through. 

Mako looked at Asami helplessly as they passed, but she only shrugged her shoulders. Mako was going to have to get out of this one on his own.

***

The group was just boarding the airship when Asami heard someone call out her name. Everyone looked over their shoulders, but before Asami could see who it was she saw Korra’s shoulders tense and her back stiffen.

“Who’s that?” Mako asked.

“Hey, Kuvira,” Asami greeted without even looking first, taking a step away from Korra. She was fairly certain Kuvira was going to probably want to greet with a hug, and she didn’t want to be closer than necessary to the Avatar when that happened.

Sure enough, Kuvira enclosed her in a half arm hug once she drew near, and the daggers that were shooting out of Korra’s eyes were a tangible force.

“Can I talk to you for a moment?” Kuvira asked. While her tone was courteous and business like, the metal bender almost seemed nervous.

Asami turned to Mako and Korra where they were waiting by the ramp. Mako was looking back and forth from Kuvira to Korra in obvious confusion. Korra simply rolled her eyes and swatted Mako’s arm to get his attention.

“Help me out here, Inspector. It seems I am unable to take care of myself in my ‘present condition’ and am in need of assistance. You know. Because of my ‘current state’.”

Asami winced at Korra’s mimic of Kuvira from the morning. The Captain didn’t notice.

Mako rolled Korra onto the ship, giving Asami a look that begged for an explanation later.

“How long will you need?” Mako called down once he had reached the top.

Asami opened her mouth to reply when Kuvira cut her off.

“I can get her back to the island myself.”

At Asami’s sharp look, Kuvira blushed.

“That is, if she doesn’t mind.”

Asami weighed her options. She honestly wanted to be up there with Korra to help her friend calm down and feel better. But then the memory of that morning resurfaced. What if Korra wanted to lie down and cuddle again? Or started looking at her with those puppy dog eyes?

No. Asami had promised herself she would start trying to get the Avatar out of her head. This was the perfect start.

“I’ll be fine,” she called up to Mako. Mako nodded, but Korra frowned and crossed her arms. Thankfully she didn’t say anything. Once the airship and set off, Asami turned to Kuvira.

“What’s up?” She asked, intentionally keeping her tone light.

“Would you like to go for a walk with me?” Kuvira asked, hold her arm out expectantly.

Asami shrugged and took her arm.

They walked in silence over to the edge of the dock. Both leaned against the railing. It was almost a direct mirror of the first time they had toured the city together, but the energy between them couldn’t have been more negative. It was a while before Kuvira said anything.

“I’m sorry for this morning and what you saw in the meeting.”

Asami frowned, but stayed silent.

“Avatar Korra is an incredible woman. But she’s so young. It’s difficul-”

“Kuvira?” Asami interrupted.

Kuvira jumped at the interruption and looked down questioningly.

“Can we not talk about Korra, please?”

Kuvira frowned and for a moment looked like she was going to argue. Eventually, she nodded her head, and remained silent.

“Is that all you wanted to talk about?” Asami finally asked.

Kuvira scrunched her face in thought then bowed her head.

“Not really. I mean, I did want to apologize about how I’m sure I came across at the meeting as rude.”

“That apology shouldn’t really be for me,” Asami said. There was a bite to her words, but Asami refused to back down as she stared unflinchingly at the Zaofu captain. 

Kuvira nodded. Without warning, she turned. She reached down and gently grasped both Asami’s hands, looking intently into her eyes.

“I need to ask you a question.”

Asami felt her stomach drop, fairly certain where this conversation was going. She gently tried to pull one of her hands away, but the Captain held on.

“Kuvira…I-”

“Is there anything going on between you and Korra?”

Damn.

Asami’s mind raced for a way to answer the question, but her mind was coming up blank. The only thing she could truly register was just how much she hated hearing Kuvira say Korra’s name.

“Korra is my best friend.”

“But do you have feelings for her?”

Asami felt a wave of irritation swell up, and she took a deep breath to try and beat it down. That was a question she had no idea how to answer even if only to herself. Was she attracted? Absolutely. But she also would never do anything that had the potential to compromise her friendship with the Avatar in any way.

“Korra is the strongest, bravest, most compassionate person I have ever met. When I had lost nearly everything to my name, there were few people that were around to help pick me back up, and Korra was one of them. Right now, I’m returning the favor.”

Asami hoped the answer would get her off the hook, but Kuvira still wouldn’t let go of her hands, and her stare was getting to be decidedly uncomfortable. Asami felt her irritation cause something to snap. Before she was even certain of what she was going to say, Asami unloaded.

“Look, I love Korra. I always will. We’ve been through too much together for that to ever change. If you have a problem with that, I understand.”

Kuvira finally released her hands and looked away. It was only then that Asami realized the venom that was in the words. Kuvira had an unreadable expression on her face, and Asami was hit with a wave of exhaustion so acute, she folded her arms on the railing and hung her head.

“I’m sorry if my question made you uncomfortable,” Kuvira finally said.

Asami couldn’t think of anything to say back, so she remained silent.

“Look, Asami, I like you. I like you a lot. It’s hard seeing how close you two are. You two share a bond. That much is obvious. I just needed to hear from you that all that is there is friendship… But, I guess not.”

Asami shrugged from where she was leaning over the railing.

“I’m sorry,” Kuvira finished.

When Asami didn’t speak up, Kuvira reached out a hesitant hand and placed it on her hip. Asami initially tensed at the contact but willed herself to relax. Either Kuvira didn’t notice or chose to ignore it, for when Asami didn’t pull away, she took another step closer and wrapped her arms around Asami’s smaller frame.

Kuvira just held her, and Asami did everything she could to calm her racing thoughts. She tried to focus on the feel of the arms around her and the steady breath on her neck. She tried to relax into the solid body in front of her and revel in the feel of the other woman’s strong back under her hands. She tried and she tried and she tried.

“Can I take you out again?”

Kuvira’s mouth was right next to Asami’s ear when she spoke, and the vibrations crashed through her body in a wave. However, instead of making her feel giddy and excited, she felt even more tired.

“When?” Asami asked, pulling back from the hug.

Kuvira smiled and swept her arm in a grand gesture around her.

“Well… We’re already here. We could just make the best of it.”

Asami was already shaking her head in the negative.

“Not tonight, Kuvira. I’m very tired, and I need some down time.”

Kuvira’s face fell, but she nodded in understanding.

“What about tomorrow night?”

Asami rubbed her face with her hand and tried to ignore the steady headache that was forming at the base of her skull.

“We’ll see.”

Kuvira gently removed Asami’s hand from her face and looked at her with a piercing gaze.

“Asami. If you don’t want to go out again, you can just-”

“No, no. Please. I do,” Asami hastily spat out. She honestly didn’t know why she said it, but the words were out. “It’s just been a long day. I’d really like to go home. Come find me tomorrow. I think tomorrow night should be fine.”

At that moment, all she wanted was to be back on the island. It’s funny, because though she had only been living there regularly since Korra had been injured, that peaceful and quiet island felt more like a home than her Sato mansion ever did. Whether that had anything to do with the inhabitants (specifically one inhabitant in particular) or not was something she chose not to think about too closely.

Kuvira studied Asami a moment longer before she apparently was satisfied with her answer. She took Asami’s arm in hers once again and resumed walking back to the docks.

Kuvira offered to fly Asami back in one of the Zaofu airships, but Asami declined. Instead, she signed off on a speedboat and made her way back solo, lost in her thoughts the whole way.

***

By the time Asami made it back to the island, it was quiet. Asami guessed everyone had already sat down for dinner. Not feeling up to being around other people just yet, she began to wander aimlessly around the island.

Two things had become abundantly clear that day.

One, she didn’t really have feelings for Kuvira. Sure, the metal bender was attractive and kind, but seeing the way she had talked to Korra had made Asami realize that were she to ever have to choose between the two, she would pick the Avatar every time. 

Secondly, her feelings for Korra were starting to get out of hand. She had known she had a crush for a while now. It had started at some point after Harmonic Convergence, but Asami couldn’t have said exactly when. All she knew, was that when she had seen Korra fall out of the sky during her fight with Zaheer and everyone thought she was going to die, Asami felt as though a part of her was dying too.

The pain had been worse than when her father had betrayed her, and it dwarfed the sensation of loss she felt when she thought she was going to lose her company, The only thing Asami could think of to compare the sensation was when she was told her mother had been stolen from her life in the most brutal way. Even that didn’t quite feel as bad. She had only been six when her mother had died. Watching Korra’s life fade away was easily the most painful experience of Asami’s life.

Asami rounded a corner and yelped as she nearly collided with someone. In the dim light, she wasn’t able to make out who it was.

“Shit. Asami! You scared the crap out of me!”

Ah, Mako again.

Unable to help it, Asami started to laugh. She laughed and laughed, and before she knew it, tears were streaming down her face. Mako started to laugh with her, but once Asami didn’t stop, he started looking at her in concern. Asami couldn’t stop, but once she tried to pull in a deep breath and felt it catch on a sob, she realized she wasn’t laughing anymore.

Mako pulled her into a fierce hug, and Asami was helpless against the sobs as they wracked through her body. He gently led them to a nearby bench and sat. He rocked her for what felt like hours as Asami wordlessly let everything out. The pain and fear at almost losing Korra. The hurt and anger at the Avatars unbearable mood swings. Her confusions and frustration at the feelings she had that she knew could never be reciprocated. Everything had suddenly become too much, and Asami was helpless as it all poured out of her in a steady stream down her face.

Once she was able to breath again, Mako wordlessly took one of her hands in his. 

“I’m sorry,” Asami said. There was still a slight catch to her breath, but at least now she was able to speak.

“Don’t be sorry. That’s what friends are for right?”

Asami groaned and dropped her head in her hands.

“Want to tell me what’s wrong?” Mako gently pushed.

Asami groaned again. How could she even start? Why would she? She opened her mouth to decline the offer but stopped. She realized that more than anything, what she wanted was to confide in someone. Yeah, pouring your heart out to your ex boyfriend about how you were in love with his ex girlfriend probably wasn’t the smartest way to go, but Mako had always been there for her, and she sensed that he probably wasn’t the worst person she could confide in.

“Mako. I’m a mess.”

“I see that,” he replied with a laugh. “Just tell me what’s wrong.”

Asami threw her head back and took a deep breath. “It might change the way you look at me, though.”

Before the words were out of her mouth, Mako had grasped her other hand as well and squeezed them both.

“Asami. Nothing is going to change how I feel about you. You are one of my best friends. We’ve been through too much for that to change.”

Asami nodded and wiped her eyes with the back of one of her hands. Asami drew in a deep breath and took the plunge. 

“There’s something I have to tell you. Something no one really knows about me.”

Mako didn’t say anything, but gently squeezed her hands gesturing for her to continue.

“I… I’m… bisexual.”

Mako didn’t say anything but looked at Asami in confusion.

“I like boys... And girls. In the same way,” Asami clarified.

Mako didn’t move and continued looking at her with that weird look. Asami felt her heart sink. She was sure that at any moment Mako was going to rip his hands away from hers and barrage her with a bunch of questions. She looked down at her hands, and waited with slumped shoulders for the interrogation to start. She felt a slight rocking to her left and looked up.

Mako was laughing. It started as a slight giggle, but when Asami looked up at him in confusion, he started laughing in earnest, wrapping his arms around his stomach to hold himself self up.

“What?” Asami asked, genuinely confused.

When Mako only started to laugh harder, Asami frowned and stood in a rush. Obviously, he thought this was some kind of joke and Asami was done.

She kicked his shin as she walked past, and Mako gasped in pain, but managed to reach out and grasp her wrist her wrist firmly.

“Wait… As… Asami… no… wait!” Mako gasped out in between bouts of laughter and winces.

Asami turned around and folded her arms expectantly across her chest. Mako shakily stood, his weight on his good leg, and wiped the tears from his eyes, trying to stem the fading laughter.

“Is that why you are so upset?” Mako finally got out. “‘Cause I’ve known that for a while now.”

Asami balked at the statement, shocked into silence.

Mako rolled his eyes.

“Asami. We dated for a while. You think I never noticed how every time I was checking another girl out you were too? And the way you talk about women!?” Mako shook his head and chuckled. “It was pretty obvious. It never bothered me, so I never thought I should bring it up.”

Asami stared back in incredulity. “You don’t think its weird?” Asami asked hesitantly.

Mako snorted. “Actually, I thought it was pretty hot.”

Asami playfully punched him in the shoulder, and Mako laughed as he ducked.

“No. I didn’t think it was weird. I mean, who am I to judge?”

At Asami’s raised brow, Mako smiled and raised both hands defensively. “Okay, okay. Who am I to judge on something like this?” He clarified.

Asami let out a sigh of relief and dropped her arms from where they had been clamped around her waist. The sadness slowly started to creep back in and Mako noticed. He took a step forward and put an arm around her shoulders, leading her back to where they had been sitting.

“That can’t be why you’re upset, though. Tell me what’s going on,” Mako nudged again. “Does this have something to do with that girl from Zaofu?”

Asami closed her eyes and leaned her head back on the wall behind them. “Kind of.”

“Did she hurt you?” Mako asked. All humor that had been in his voice was gone, replaced by an intensity that left little to the imagination with what he would do were that the case.

Asami cracked a little smile at her friend’s protectiveness but shook her head. “No. It’s nothing like that.”

“Oh. Well… are you two…”

Asami groaned again and bumped her head lightly on the wall behind her. “Sort of.”

“But that’s… bad?”

Asami turned her head and opened one eye to peek at her friend. Mako looked thoroughly confused and was scratching the back of his head.

“I don’t know.”

“Hmm.”

“I have feelings for someone else.”

“Oookay! Now we’re in familiar territory,” Mako said excitedly, sitting up as he rubbed his hands together in enthusiasm.

Asami laughed and swatted at him with her arm. Of course. He would be an expert in this kind of situation. It was the very definition of the triangle that had gone on with Korra, Mako, and Asami. Mako seemed to realize the connection as well, for he ducked his head in shame.

“Oh, yeah. Sorry”

Asami laughed and shook her head. “I think we’re all past that by now Mako. It’s okay.”

Mako pulled himself together and turned to Asami. “So who is… this person?”

Asami laughed again. “I’d rather not tell you. But I care about this person a lot.”

“Hmph.”

“And I’m pretty sure this person won’t ever feel the same way about me. So that’s hard.”

“Okay.” Mako nodded. 

“It’s just… I don’t think I’ve ever cared about someone this much before. I’ve never felt this way. It’s really scary, and I don’t know what to do.”

Mako nodded again and folded his arms, lightly clasping his chin with one of his hands. “But you don’t want to tell him?...Er ...or her?”

Asami’s eyes widened in fear. “No! How could I? It could ruin everything.”

“How so?” Mako frowned.

“I’d rather have this person as a friend than not have them in my life at all.”

Mako nodded. “Or,” he reached out and grabbed one of her hands, waiting patiently for Asami to look up, “You can tell Korra how you feel and maybe find out she feels the same.”

“You don’t know that! You- ”

Asami felt her face drain as the implication of Mako’s words finally hit her. He was looking at her with a gentle smile. Asami stood and started pacing. How the hell had he known she was talking about Korra?

“Asami. Calm down.”

When Asami continued pacing, Mako stood and tried to reach out a comforting hand. Asami shrugged it off.

“Look. If it makes you feel better, I’m pretty sure no one else knows.”

Asami rounded on Mako with wide eyes. “Someone else knows!?”

Mako blanched. “No, no, no. God. What is it with girls and their hearing?! They never seem to actually hear what you’re saying.”

“Well, how did you know?” Asami yelled back. Mako winced at the loud noise and motioned for them to keep it down.

“Well, for starters, I know you. I know first hand how you treat someone and look at someone when you care about them in that way… so yeah. It wasn’t that much of a stretch when you started talking about how you have feelings for someone.”

Asami felt the fight leave her in a rush, and she walked back to the stone bench and slumped down.

“Mako... I don’t know what I’m going to do.”

Mako followed her over. “I know this is going to sound really weird coming from me. I mean, I should have a medal or something for avoiding feelings and stuff... But honestly? I think you should just tell her.”

Asami groaned and buried her face in her hands. How could he make it sound so easy?

“Look. I know both of you. And it’s obvious you guys have a friendship that is deeper than anything the rest of us share. You seem to calm her down and can talk to her in a way no one else can. It’s amazing really. And whether or not those feelings are… I dunno… the way that yours are, you aren’t just a friend to her either. That much I know for sure.”

“How can you be so sure?”

Mako threw up his hands, and rolled his eyes. “Asami. C’mon. Even you know that you can get away with saying pretty much anything to our dear Avatar without getting your head bit off. Who else can do that? And when she needed so much help in the beginning with her legs and all, who was the ONLY person she would allow near her?”

Asami opened her mouth with an argument, and Mako stilled her with a touch.

“Stop trying to think about how wrong I am, and just think about what I said.”

Asami shut her mouth with an audible snap.

The possibility that there was substance to what Mako was saying was almost too much to hope for. She wanted more than anything for it to be true. However, the prospect of allowing herself to hope and to open up like that only to be shot down was absolutely terrifying.

Mako could see the conflict in her face and pulled her in for a hug.

“Just think about it, okay?”

Asami nodded into his shoulder.

A loud noise broke them apart. Looking around, Asami could see lights flashing over where the airship docking station was and loud voices were drifting through the compound. Mako and Asami looked at each other in confusion before standing in unison to make their way over to the commotion.


	10. Chapter 10

Korra

Korra’s stomach twisted painfully as she watched the airship slowly descend. Air acolytes busied themselves with tying the ship down, and Korra had no idea what to expect. Toph had always seemed larger than life. The idea of actually meeting the woman was incredibly intimidating.

Korra tore her eyes from the spectacle above her and scanned the crowd for Asami. More than anything, she wanted Asami’s soothing presence beside her, for her nerves were absolutely shot. She caught a glimpse of Asami hugging a far corner and saw that Mako was with her. She tried to will the heiress over to where Korra was sitting, but either Asami truly hadn’t seen her, or was studiously avoiding looking her direction.

Korra felt a strong hand settle on her shoulder and looked up. Tenzin was standing by her side, hope shining strongly in his eyes, but Korra felt like she was going to be sick. What if Toph wasn’t able to help? What if Korra was going to be stuck in a wheelchair for the rest of her life, slowly wasting away as the remaining poison in her body wreaked its slow and devastating havoc? Korra felt her breath start to hitch and tried taking big and calming breaths to stem the hysteria she could feel bubbling in her chest.

She was about to meet the greatest earth bender to have ever lived, and in that moment, Korra felt like she could burst into tears at any moment. Just when she thought she was going to lose it, Tenzin’s hand lifted off her shoulder and was replaced with a much lighter and soothing one. Asami was by her side, crouching down so she was eye level with the Avatar. She slid one arm around Korra’s shoulders, and grabbed onto Korra’s hand with her other.

Immediately Korra felt her heart begin to slow and tilted her head to rest it on Asami’s shoulder. Asami’s hair slipped around her face, and cradled in Asami’s presence surrounded by the smell of Asami’s hair and perfume, Korra felt herself start to fully relax.

“It’s going to be okay, Korra. If this doesn’t work, we’ll figure something else out,” Asami whispered into her ear.

Korra reached up and grasped Asami’s hand where it was resting on her shoulder. “Thank you,” Korra whispered back.

The airship finally landed, and the hatch was released with a loud hiss. Su walked up the ramp and a few moments later, returned with an older woman on her arm. Once the pair made it to the ground, the older woman ripped her arm from Su’s grasp and crossed her arms across her chest, surveying the group of people around her. It was weird, because while Korra knew that Toph was blind, when those sightless eyes moved in her direction, she felt as though the blind woman was looking into her soul.

“Hey there, Twinkle Toes. Looks like you have a little hitch in your giddyup.” 

Korra stiffened in shock and mild outrage, but straightened her shoulders as Toph walked over. Though Korra knew the woman had to be at least in her 80’s, the only sign that belied her age was the stark white hair that was pulled back in a tight bun. Her bangs however, were hanging loosely in her face, and it made her look intimidating and more than a little scary.

Korra cleared her throat. “Master Toph. It’s an honor mee-”

“Yeah, yeah. Save the formalities. I hear you have some metal poisoning you need help with.”

Korra looked around for help, and thankfully Su came to her rescue.

“The Red Lotus poisoned her with some kind of metal, and we need your help getting the rest out. I got enough out to save her life, but it seems I missed some.”

Toph turned her head to the sound but never fully met Su’s face. It was strange seeing how Toph moved. She led her head with her ears, and it made her look alien and strange. Korra searched for some sort of feeling of kinship that may have stayed as a residue from her time sharing Aang’s spirit, but there was nothing. Toph was scary. Toph was undeniably very powerful, and it was very clear Toph knew it.

The elder woman walked over to where Korra sat, and Asami scrambled out of the way. Korra immediately felt ten times more vulnerable without Asami there to support her, and she grit her teeth as the metal bender drew near. She was the Avatar dammit! She had encountered far worse than an 80-something blind woman. Without warning, Toph reached forward and placed a rough hand on Korra’s forehead.

At first, Korra felt nothing. Then her brain exploded.

It felt like thousands of needles were stabbing her from the inside out, and Korra had to bite her tongue to keep from crying out. Her arms and legs started shaking uncontrollably, and her fingers started to twitch. Toph tilted her head eerily to the side, and the pain suddenly spiked in intensity.

“Stop it!” Asami yelled out. She rushed forward and pushed Toph’s hand away, stepping between the two as if to shield Korra from another onslaught.

Korra slumped forward in her chair, breathing heavily through the tears that had started to stream down her face. Toph turned her sightless gaze on Asami, and Korra watched in amazement as Asami stared her down, unmoving from her protective stance.

Toph canted her head in Su’s direction. “Who’s the princess?”

“Mom, that’s Asami. She’s Korra’s... best friend.”

Toph grunted and turned her sightless gaze back to Asami. Her ghostly eyes narrowed slightly before she smiled. Reaching forward, she placed a rough hand on Asami’s arm and patted it hard enough to cause Asami to stumble.

“I like you.”

Asami regained her footing, and looked to Su in confusion.

Korra stiffened as Toph walked around Asami and crouched next to the arm of the chair. Sensing Korra’s discomfort, Toph laughed.

“Relax, Twinkle Toes. I won’t do that again. I just wanted to see if my daughter’s guess was at all accurate.”

Korra looked up. “And?”

“Oh, there’s still some of that poison in you alright.”

Korra slumped back in the chair, an odd combination of relief and anxiety making her head spin. “Can you do something about it?”

Toph tilted her head to the side and placed another hand on Korra’s arm. Korra tensed as she waited for the pain to start again, but all she felt was slight warmth and tingling.

“Yeah. I think I can.” Toph stood up. “Not tonight, though. I’m beat.”

Korra exhaled in a rush. She couldn’t have said she was relieved that the healing wouldn’t be that evening, or frustrated that she was going to have to wait.

Toph stood and gestured for her daughter. “Su. Can you take this old woman to her room? These aching joints need a little rest.”

Su walked over and reached out to take Toph’s arm, but Toph ignored it and walked away. She needed about as much help as a child did eating a cookie, but Korra guessed she wanted to talk to Su in private or something, for Su just shrugged and followed her mother into the compound.

“Tenzin! Send me some of those fruit pies you air heads are always making around here. I’m starving!” Toph yelled over her shoulder.

There was collective sigh of relief once the metal bender left the clearing. Tenzin walked over and laid a hand on Korra’s shoulder.

“Are you alright?” Tenzin asked, concern coloring his gentle tone. 

Korra nodded. “I’m fine. I just wasn’t expecting that.” She looked up at Tenzin questioningly. “Is she always like that?”

Tenzin opened his mouth to reply, and Toph’s voice wafted over from the compound in the distance. 

“I heard that!”

Both Korra and Tenzin winced, turning to look and see if Toph was going to say anything else. Or worse; come back. 

When it looked like they were all in the clear, Tenzin heaved a sigh of relief, chuckling a little to himself as he turned back to the wheelchair bound woman. 

“Do you need help getting to your room?”

Asami stepped forward and grabbed Korra’s handles. “I’ve got her.”

Korra looked up at Tenzin and nodded. The airbender gave one final squeeze of her shoulder and walked away.

 

Asami wordlessly rolled Korra back to her room and once inside, helped Korra out of her furs and slipped some soft linen pajamas over her underclothes. Korra found she was hyper aware of every time Asami’s fingers brushed against her skin, and the sensation left her breathless. Though Asami was obviously working as fast as she could, she slipped up more than usual. When Korra looked up to see what was wrong, she noticed that Asami was trying to do the whole thing without actually looking at what her hands were doing. It seemed Korra wasn’t the only one that was suddenly uncomfortable with this, and the Avatar would have given anything to know what Asami was thinking in that moment.

Once Korra was in bed with the covers tucked around her knees, Asami smiled and started to walk out of the room.

“Asami…”

Asami stopped and looked over her shoulder. “Yes, Korra?”

Korra worked her mouth as she struggled to come up with something to say. What she really wanted was for Asami to stay. To curl up with her in bed and help chase away the uncertainty and fears that lay in wait the following day. She wanted to be held, and for Asami to whisper in her ear that everything was going to be alright, and that she was going to be okay. She wanted to feel cradled in Asami’s safe embrace, warded off from the nightmares that plagued her deep in the middle of the night when she was at her most defenseless.

“I… Will you…”

“Will I what?”

Korra exhaled, her nerve having abandoned her in a rush. “Goodnight.”

Asami dropped her eyes and hung her head. If Korra didn’t know any better, Asami looked almost… disappointed.

Without raising her eyes, Asami turned back towards the door. “Goodnight, Korra.”

The sound of the door shutting behind her was one of the loneliest and most depressing sounds Korra had ever heard.

 

When Korra woke the next morning, it wasn’t Asami who greeted her like usual. Kya bustled in and chatted away as she helped Korra up and about. Korra hadn’t slept at all, and her nerves felt so shot, it was an effort not to snap at the perky water bender every other second. Knowing that she needed to control herself, Korra bit her tongue and suffered through the morning as quietly as she could.

Kya rolled her into the dining room, and it was already full of most of the islands inhabitants. Ikki and Meelo were much more calm than they had been the day before, and Korra was extremely grateful. Toph, Su, and Kuvira were missing, though that wasn’t necessarily bad news. Asami was sitting at the table with a couple papers spread in front of her, but Korra could tell by the way her eyes weren’t moving that she wasn’t really reading anything.

Kya parked her next to Asami, and the heiress jumped when Korra’s chair gently bumped the table.

“Oh. Hey, morning,” Asami mumbled, never quite meeting Korra’s eyes.

Korra frowned and began to idly push her food around on her plate. Her stomach was twisted into a knot, and the idea of food made her so nauseous that even looking at it was making her worse.

“You sleep, okay?” Asami asked.

Korra shrugged, but remained silent.

Asami sighed and finally raised her eyes. “Korra. I want to ta-”

“Alright, everyone,” Tenzin said, lightly tapping the table to get everyone’s attention.

“As I’m sure most of you know, Aunt To- I mean Master Toph arrived last night. I want everyone to be on his or her best behavior. That woman is not to be tested or tried.” He chuckled a little to himself. “Trust me. I know. I also got word that Opal and Bolin will be arriving any minute now, and I’m sure many of you will be very happy to see them.”

Korra frowned in frustration at the interruption, and waiting patiently for Tenzin to stop before turning back to Asami.

“Sorry. What were you going to say?”

Asami sighed heavily, and slumped in her chair, mirroring Korra as she pushed her food around on her plate.

“Never mind.”

Korra’s frown deepened.

“It’ll be nice to see Bolin,” Asami said, raising her head in a hopeful smile. The smile didn’t quite reach her eyes though, and Korra ached with the need to know what was wrong.

Korra opened her mouth to ask just that, but the clanging of a bell from the high tower interrupted her. The ringing usually indicated there were visitors, but was generally reserved for when it was other airbenders arriving on a sky bison.

Asami smiled and stood, grasping Korra’s handles so she could wheel them outside.

Sure enough, Korra was just able to make out the shape of a medium sized sky bison steadily floating their way.

As soon as the bison landed, Opal jumped off and landed as gracefully as a dancer as she summoned a slight gust of wind to soften the impact. Bolin followed directly after, but his foot got caught in the saddle at the last second, and Korra couldn’t help but laugh as her friend rolled to the ground in a crumpled heap.

Opal floated over to Asami and gave her a big hug before turning to Korra and crouching so she could do the same with the Avatar. Bolin hastily stood and dusted himself off before running over and picking Korra up, wheelchair and all, spinning her around in his excitement.

“Oh, man, Korra! It is so good to see you!”

He set Korra down and gave Asami a hug as well, lifting her up in equal enthusiasm. Asami laughed, gently pushing him to let her down.

“How’s the Air Temple?” Korra asked.

“Oh my god. So boring!” Bolin let out without hesitation. Opal laughed and playfully swatted at her boyfriends arm.

“It’s not so bad. I still need a little more training before they’ll let me join the other airbenders in the Earth Kingdom.”

“How are you doing?” Opal asked.

Korra was just opening her mouth to respond, when she caught a glimpse of a familiar figure walking towards them from the direction of the docks. When Korra failed to immediately respond, Asami turned around to see what had caught her friend’s attention.

She’s just like Bolin and Opal. She’s no worse than Ikki and Meelo, Korra chanted to herself as Kuvira walked up, doing her best to stay true to her word and not lash out. While she may at one point have been willing to try and gloss things over with the metal bender, the events of the day before had settled the deal. Korra didn’t like her, and that’s all there was to it. It was only for Asami’s sake that she didn’t act outright hostile, though even that was pretty difficult.

“Oh hey, Kuvira,” Asami said by way of greeting.

Korra couldn’t help but notice how Asami maneuvered her way so that Korra’s chair was between her and the advancing woman. The gesture filled Korra with a raging torrent of conflicting emotions. While she was definitely pleased at the distance Asami was obviously putting between her and the metal bender, Korra wondered why Asami had felt that was necessary in the first place. The idea that Kuvira had hurt or threatened Asami in anyway made an angry beast come to life deep within her chest.

“Korra. Opal. Bolin.”

Kuvira nodded to the trio before ignoring the obstacle of Korra’s chair completely, reaching around to give Asami a partial hug. Kuvira’s hip gently nudged Korra’s shoulder, and it took everything the Avatar had to not shove back with all her might. 

“How are you doing today?” Kuvira asked.

Korra turned around to try and keep her eyes on the pair behind her, but Kuvira had coincidently stood in the one spot Korra had the hardest time seeing. Korra winced at a pang in her back as she twisted around the other way and looked at Asami to give her a pointed look, gritting her teeth in anger. She knew she had promised to be nice, but this was a little ridiculous. Kuvira was pretending as though Korra wasn’t even there!

“I’m alright. Thanks for asking,” Asami replied. Though she was smiling, Korra could tell that her friend was more than a little uncomfortable, and a faint blush was slowly creeping across the bridge of her nose.

“I was wondering-”

“Do you mind?!” Korra finally blurted out. 

Asami flinched, and Korra saw Kuvira jump out of the corner of her eye. Korra felt bad, for she knew she was being rude, but this was a bit much. Korra could tell Asami felt the same, for instead of an angry scowl, her friend blushed and looked down at Korra, guilt strewn across her features. Kuvira just looked down, staring at Korra with an unapologetic frown.

“Anyways, I was wondering if I could take you out again,” Kuvira finished, having backed away so she was no longer in Korra’s space.

Korra watched as Asami’s face flickered through a multitude of expressions, and the silence stretched out as Kuvira waited for a response.

“Awkward…” Bolin said in a dramatically singsong voice behind his hand. His eyes were darting back and forth from Kuvira to Korra with a look that clearly indicated he wasn’t blind to the obvious tension.

When Korra turned her angry scowl on her earthbending friend, Bolin smoothly slid behind Opal’s shoulder, using her as a human shield to protect himself from the Avatar’s wrath.

“Uh… I think I hear Pabu. Don’t you, Opal? Yeah… I definitely hear Pabu calling. Don’t worry, buddy! Let’s just-”

“Did you two go out?” Opal asked with open curiosity.

The question was innocent enough, but for some strange reason, Asami’s blush was deepening in intensity by the second.

Kuvira nodded. “Yes. We had a dinner date.”

“Kuvira had never been to Republic City before now. I figured I’d show her around,” Asami hastily added.

Kuvira and Opal looked at Asami with varying expressions. Kuvira was frowning slightly, and Opal looked thoughtful and was staring at the heiress as if she was seeing her for the first time.

Korra was just confused.

“Which brings us back to my question,” Kuvira said, turning back to Asami.   
“Are you free to… show me around some more. Tonight?”

Korra watched the exchange, sure she was missing out on something. It was clear that everyone else knew exactly what was going on.

“Opal and I can give you a tour,” Bolin helpfully suggested.

Okay. Maybe not everyone, Korra thought at the trio of frowns that greeted his suggestion.

“Bolin… I don’t think-“ Opal started, but Asami hastily cut her off.

“Toph was probably going start on Korra’s healing tonight, so I was actually hoping to stick around for that. Some other time, though?”

Korra couldn’t help but smile smugly at Kuvira’s answering frown, though she was very curious as to why Asami was acting so weird. There was something her friend wasn’t telling her, and the thought made Korra very uneasy.

“Hmm. Okay,” Kuvira replied. “I guess just tell me when you’re free? There’s not much that I’m being asked to do here in the city, so my schedule will be pretty open until I am given an assignment.”

Asami nodded. “Absolutely.”

Kuvira stood there for a moment, clearly not knowing what to do. For a second, she looked as confused as Korra felt, but hastily pulled herself together to smile one last time before giving a curt bow and walking away.

“Asami...” Opal hesitantly began. “Are you and Kuvira-”

“Friends? Yes. We met when she landed and have hung out a couple times.”

Korra studied her friend through narrowed eyes. Asami was twisting her hair with both hands and refused to make eye contact. Okay. Something was definitely going on.

Opal frowned when Asami wouldn’t meet her eyes, but seemed to take pity on the heiress and shrugged. She turned to Bolin.

“We have to unpack, and I would like to go say hi to my grandmother.”

Bolin dropped the suitcase he had just been handed, and it landed on his foot with a heavy sounding thud. Bolin barely seemed to notice.

“You want to go see Toph… now?”

Opal looked over her shoulder and frowned. “Of course. Why would we wait?”

“But... Right now, right now? Don’t you mean later, right now? Or later right now, not right now, but some other time, right now?”

“Bolin. You’re not making any sense,” Opal said with a wry grin.

Korra laughed. “Are you nervous over meeting Toph?” Korra asked.

Bolin looked sharply at Korra and made a face. “Me?! Nervous? Why would I be nervous? It’s not like she is the single most influential earth bender in all of history and single handedly developed a new bending style. Why would that make me nervous?”

Opal laughed and floated down next to her boyfriend to give him an encouraging peck on the cheek. “If you want to wait to meet her later, that’s fine. I’m sure Korra and Asami would love to catch up with you.”

Bolin sighed in relief but caught himself when he noticed the three pairs of eyes watching him.

“Well. If you insist. I mean, Toph can wait. I’ll just stay here with Korra and Asami for a little bit.”

Opal rolled her eyes. “Whatever you say.”

Several air acolytes showed up and began lugging Bolin and Opal’s things to their room. Opal leaned up and kissed Bolin on the cheek once more before she waved farewell and skipped off to go see her grandmother.

Asami started to steer Korra down a pathway towards their rooms when another air acolyte walked up and wordlessly handed Asami a piece of paper. Korra watched as Asami frowned while she read.

“Everything okay?” Korra asked.

Asami sighed and shook her head. “There’s a problem with one of our contracts. A buyer is saying he’s getting cheated, and I’m going to need to sit in on a phone conference.”

“I can take over,” Bolin offered. He stepped behind Korra and gently grabbed the handles from where Asami had been holding them and turned Korra around so she was facing her friend.

Asami was looking downcast and sad, and Korra ached to know why. She reached up and grabbed one of Asami’s hands.

“Hey. You okay?”

Asami shook her head and smiled, though she gently pulled her hand out of Korra’s grasp. The act made Korra anxious. Asami had been doing that a lot lately, and Korra had no idea why.

“I guess I’ll be back in a couple hours,” Asami said. She reached over and gave Bolin a hug, then hesitantly bent down to give one to Korra as well. Her movements were stiff and awkward, and by the time Asami had walked away, Korra felt like she was strung so tight, she would snap at any moment.

“Huh,” Bolin said.

Korra rounded on her friend in a rush. “What?!”

Bolin widened his eyes at the accusatory tone, and lifted his hands in submission. “I’m not sure what’s going on here, so I’m just gunna stay quiet.”

Korra folded her arms and snapped her mouth shut as Bolin grabbed Korra’s handles and started pushing her down the walkway.

“But if I was going to say something, I’d probably say something along the lines of ‘well that was weird. I wonder what’s going on around here?’”

“Bolin?”

“Yes, Korra?”

“Can you just cut the bullshit and say what’s on your mind?”

Bolin widened his eyes as Korra’s blunt request, then nodded. He rolled them over to where the trees met the edge of the path and stomped his foot. Immediately, the ground around them rose until it was level with the cliff above them. With a quick punch, he leveled the ground in front of them into something that would make due as a walkway and pushed her forward. Once they were fairly secluded, he flicked his wrist, and a stone block rose out of the ground that was the perfect height for him to use as a bench.

“Okay. So how’s my bestie?”

Korra squeezed her eyes shut and pinched the bridge of her nose. “I’m fine.”

“You don’t look so fine.”

“It’s just... that Kuvira chick.”

“Go on.”

“She just pisses me off. She thinks she knows everything, and that her word is law, but really, she doesn’t know what she’s talking about!”

“Hmm. Interesting.”

“And now she and Asami have been going out, and I don’t even – what are you doing!?”

Bolin sat up from where he was hunched. He had somehow come across a rather ridiculous brown pointy beard and glasses, and was scrutinizing her over a pad of paper through the rather thick spectacles.

Bolin held out his arms and beamed. “I’m counseling! Right?!”

Korra raised a bow.

“I saw it in a mover. I just sit here and say ‘hmmm’ and ‘oooh’ and ‘that’s interesting’, and ‘tell me more’, and you start crying and telling me things, like, ‘My daddy never loved me!’ Then I say ‘I understand how you feel’, then you say ‘Oh, wow. I feel much better now, thank you, doctor’ ...Then they kiss and fall in love and stuff, but we don’t have to do that part…”

Korra gaped at him.

“What?! It works every time!”

Finally Korra came to her senses and started laughing. Once she started, she couldn’t stop, and her sides started to burn as muscles that had long gone unused were suddenly kicked into overdrive.

“You… You are so… Wow…” Korra tried to get out in between laughs. Bolin reached forward and started stroking her back.

“There there, little lady. Let the Doctor’s magic do its work”.

Korra swatted his hand away and if anything started laughing harder.

It was a while before she was able to get herself under control. Finally when she felt able to speak, Bolin patted her shoulder a couple times and sat back.

“Bolin. You’re too much.”

Bolin let out a dramatic sigh. “That’s what they tell me,” he said with a wink. 

Korra was still giggling as she wiped a tear from her eyes.

“So what’s going on with Asami?”

Korra’s stomach tightened at the mention of her friend, and just like that, her laughter died all together. Bolin frowned as he saw the shift.

“You guys get in a fight or something? Last I saw, you two seemed like you were getting really close.”

Korra sighed. “It’s nothing like that. We are really close”.

“Then what’s the problem?”

Korra frowned, and balled her hands into fists. “It’s that stupid Zaofu Captain.”

“Kuvira?”

Korra only growled the affirmative.

“Isn’t she just helping out with the whole earth kingdom thing?”

“Yeah.”

“Then… well… I’m confused.”

“She and Asami are friends now.”

“Okay.”

“NOT OKAY, Bolin. Not okay!”

“Woah, woah. OKAY. Not okay… Why is that not okay?”

Korra growled and threw up her hands. “Because Kuvira is a snake! I don’t like her, and she needs to crawl back into whatever hole she came from.”

Bolin sat up a little straighter and rested his forearms on his knees. “Do you think she’s trying to hurt Asami?”

“Oh, she better not.”

“So you don’t think that’s what the issue is?”

“I don’t know. I just don’t like how much time they have spent together.”

“Well how much is that?”

“I don’t know! I know they’ve hung out in Republic City a couple times. And you heard her. She wants to take Asami out again.”

“Hmm.”

“I don’t even know what Asami sees in her!”

“Okay.”

“What does that metal bending giant have that I don’t? Why does she feel like she needs to have someone like Kuvira around?! Aren’t I enough?”

“Ahh.”

“She’s not even a cool person. She uptight, and stupid, and tall…”

“Well...”

“Well what?!” Korra yelled, rounding on Bolin in a rush.

His beard was back on, as were his glasses, but by the look he was giving her, it was clear he wasn’t trying to play some character.

“Umm, Korra?”

“Yes?”

“I want to try something else.”

Korra folded her arms and sank into her chair, glaring at Bolin with the scariest expression she could muster. Bolin flinched a little, but held his ground.

“Fine.”

“Okay. Why don’t you tell me about Asami?”

Korra sat up a little in confusion.

“What do you mean?”

“Well. You just told me all about Kuvira. Now I want you to tell me about Asami.”

“What do you want me to say?”

“I don’t know. Tell me about how she’s helped you since you’ve gotten back.”

Korra closed her eyes and thought back to when she first came back from her fight with Zaheer. She didn’t remember much from those first couple days. Even though most of the poison was out of her system, it had taken days for her to be able to stay awake longer than a few minutes at a time at most. The faces around her were constantly a blur, but she could vaguely remember who was there. She remembered her father’s concerned eyes as they hovered over her. She remembered twin flashes of grey as Kya and Katara had done their best to work their magic. She remembered Mako’s angry and concerned voice yelling for answers, and Bolin’s pathetic whimpers as he had cradled Pabu for comfort.

Mostly, she remembered twin orbs of jade as they watched her from her side. She remembered that silky hand that always found its way into hers whenever she started to stir awake. She remember the soft touch at her throat as fingers worked to help hold her head up so she could drink, and those same fingers brushing soothingly across her forehead and cheeks to lull her back to sleep when she was done.

“She’s been there from the beginning,” Korra said, reverence coloring her tone until it was almost a prayer.

Korra always knew that Asami had been there from day one, but she had never really strained to try and remember that first week. When she began to be able to stay awake for longer and longer stretches, of course Asami had been there. Korra never questioned it because Asami had been there from the beginning.

“Tell me how Asami makes you feel.”

For reasons unknown, the question made Korra extremely uncomfortable. She had no idea how she could even begin to put into words how Asami made her feel. Asami was just… there. She was Korra’s rock. Her foundation. Her sanctuary.

“She… She makes me feel normal,” Korra finally got out.

“What do you mean?”

“Well… everyone always wants things and needs t hings and ‘Oh please, miss Avatar. I know you’re only eighteen, but please solve all my problems’... Asami has never been like that. She just treats me… normal. I like it.”

“So why isn’t it okay for Asami to have other friends?”

Korra grunted in frustration. The very mention of Kuvira caused all the warm and fuzzy feelings she was starting to have to crash down.

“It’s okay for her to have other friends.” Bolin looked at her with a raised brow. “Just not that friend!”

“You know… I think I’ve seen you like this before.”

“What?” Korra asked in confusion.

“Yeah. I’m pretty sure I have.”

“What are you talking about?”

“There is only one other person I’ve seen you take such an intense and crazy irrational dislike to. Ever.”

Korra rolled her eyes and turned her chair so she was no longer facing her earthbending friend.

“No. No. Hear me out,” Bolin said, flicking Korra’s platform around like a spinning plate so they were once again facing each other.

“I’ve seen you hate people. I’ve seen you fight people. I’ve also seen you get along with people splendidly, even though everyone else can’t understand it. But only once have I seen you decide to hate someone.”

Korra sighed in defeat.

“Fine. I’ll play. What are you getting at?”

“It’s Asami!” Bolin threw his arms out, and there was an unspoken ta-da the gesture.

Korra looked up with a raised brow, thoroughly confused.

“What?” Korra asked.

Bolin laughed. “No. Think about it! When you were all gaga about Mako and he brought Asami around, you HATED her. It was ridiculous! Poor girl couldn’t do or say anything right. You just hated her and that was the end of it!”

Korra threw up her hands in frustration. She had no idea what point Bolin was trying to make, but all this talk was making her extremely irritated.

“Bolin. This is completely different. I had feelings for Mako. Of course I hated Asami. I mean, once Mako turned out to be an idiot, and I got to know Asami, it was obvious that she was amazing and perfect, and I was a dumbass.”

Bolin raised his eyebrows, and gave her a long and leering smile. “Riiiight. Completely different.”

“I’m serious. Kuvira is just bad. And Asami shouldn’t be wasting her time with someone like that.”

“Mmhmm,” Bolin said, though that stupid grin wouldn’t leave his face.

“Bolin. This is ridiculous.”

“Yeah. Sure. Okay.”

Korra looked at him for a moment longer sure she was misunderstanding something. It almost seemed as though Bolin was trying to hint that Korra had… feelings? For Asami?

Before Korra could delve a little deeper into that particular train of thought, the sound of someone yelling their names caused Bolin to look down over the edge.

Kya was yelling up at them and waving her hands to try and get their attention.

“Looks like our counseling session is over, little lady,” Bolin said in his weird overly faked deep voice.

He walked over and grabbed Korra’s handles to steady the chair as he lowered them back onto the same level as the rest of the pavilion.

“There you are!” Kya said in exasperation. “Toph was hoping to get started on looking you over and-”

CRASH!

Korra and Kya looked down. Bolin had fainted at their feet. 

“Has Bolin been going through Uncle Sokka’s things?” Kya asked, bending down to finger the beard that was still in place on Bolin’s face.

Korra laughed. “I have no idea.”

Opal walked around the corner, and started giggling.

“You tell him we’re about to go see Grandma Toph?”

Korra and Kya nodded. Opal rolled her eyes and sighed, though there was obviously love in her eyes as she gazed down at her blacked out earthbender boyfriend.

“He’ll be fine. I was actually sent to get Korra and bring her to my grandmother.”

Kya bent down and surveyed Bolin’s prone form. He was twitching and occasionally would whimper something that sounded weirdly like ‘Master Toph’ and ‘your eternal servant’ and some other weird things. Kya rolled her eyes again.

“I’ll stay with the lug. Opal. You get Korra over to Toph. Let’s just pray to the Spirits that this will actually work”.

Opal nodded and took hold of Korra’s handles. She started pushing her in the direction of the huts, but Korra twisted around and stopped her.

“Can we stop by my room real quick? I want to leave a note for Asami for when she comes back.”

“Sure,” Opal said, and turned them around.


	11. chapter 11

Asami

Asami set the phone into the cradle and gently began to rub her temples with both her hands. The phone call had been brutal, and several times throughout, Asami had struggled to contain her temper. It was unusual for Asami to lose her cool, but lately she felt so uptight. Just about anything could set her off.

Asami leaned back in the desk chair and groaned. Everything felt like it was spinning out of control. That conversation with Opal and Bolin when Kuvira had walked up couldn’t have gone worse, and Asami knew Korra was aware that there was something going on. Asami was going to have to come clean about her little secret… And soon. She had wanted to say something at breakfast, but Tenzin’s interruption had made her completely lose her nerve. She had no idea how she was going to go about it, but it was time.

Asami needed to tell Korra how she felt. Today, Asami thought to herself. After the healing. Asami couldn’t wait any longer. She needed to get this confession off her chest and be done with it. If Korra didn’t understand or feel the same way, Asami would have to learn to live with it. At least she wouldn’t be living a lie. At least she would no longer have to hide and pretend that she was something she wasn’t.

Asami glanced at the clock on the wall and noticed with a start that she had been on the phone for well over an hour. Asami stood and stretched, flinching as she felt her back pop and crack after being hunched over for so long. She left the makeshift office and made her way to her room. She was just passing the dining area when she heard a familiar voice. Asami frowned and paused, pressing her ear to the door so she could hear.

“No. It’s going to have to be soon,” a voice answered frantically.

“Everything's not ready!” Kuvira whispered.

Asami peered her eye through the gap in the door to see if she could identify the other individual in the room, but was only able to make out folds of green cloth. With the multitudes of earthbenders staying on the island, it literally could have been anyone.

“It’s going to have to be,” the whisperer hissed back. “We’ve run out of time”.

“Look. I told you. It’s not ready yet.”

“If you’ve gone soft because of that-”

“You leave her out of this. It has nothing to do with her.”

Asami frowned. What could Kuvira possibly be talking about?

“It better not. I’ve done my job, Captain. It’s time that you do yours.”

Asami was just about to open the door to see for herself, when the door suddenly swung open. Asami had been leaning against the panes and nearly fell into Kuvira’s lap.

Kuvira looked down with a strange expression on her face as she watched Asami regain her balance.

“Asami? What are you doing?” Kuvira asked, surprise etched on the taller woman’s face. She glanced behind her into the room then swiftly closed it behind her, blocking Asami’s view before she could make out the other inhabitant.

“Who were you talking to?” Asami asked. She had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach, and Kuvira’s darting eyes and twitching hands were doing nothing to calm her nerves.

“Just one of my lieutenants,” Kuvira answered, crowding Asami forward so she had no choice but to take a step away from the door. 

“What were you talking about?” Asami asked, doing her best to try and look around the taller frame of the woman in front of her. 

“We were... discussing plans for the camps in the Earth Kingdom. Nothing for you to worry about,” Kuvira said, a little too quickly for Asami’s comfort.

When Asami opened her mouth to fire back another question, Kuvira cut her off.

“Asami. Really. It’s nothing. Were you looking for me, or is there something else I can help you with?” 

Asami balked at the sudden change in subject. While her tone wasn’t exactly angry or mean, it definitely had a harder edge to it than the heiress was used to coming from the tall and gentle Zaofu Captain. Kuvira was acting strange, and Asami didn’t like it.

“What’s not ready, Kuvira? What’s going on?”

Kuvira grunted in frustration, placing a strong hand on the small of Asami’s back as she ushered her down the hall towards her room. She plastered a smile on her face, but even in the dim lighting of the hallway, Asami could see that the expression didn’t quite reach her eyes. 

“It’s nothing, Asami. There were a lot of things we discussed in the meeting yesterday that you missed. There are a lot of time sensitive parts to this plan we have to help the Earth Kingdom, and it’s difficult making sure everything is on schedule. I’m sure you can relate, being the CEO of such an illustrious company as Future Industries.”

Asami looked up and realized Kuvira had led her to her room. 

“Kuvira… What’s going-”

“Please tell me you’ve changed your mind. Is that why you were looking for me?”

“I- what?” Asami shook her head.

“You had said before that you wanted to go out with me again. I know Korra has her healing session with Toph later, but I doubt you can really make a difference by being there. Please reconsider and let me take you out instead.”

Asami frowned, and backed slowly away from Kuvira. Something wasn’t right, and it was making her very nervous. Kuvira noticed and frowned, raising her hands in a placating gesture.

“Hey. What’s wrong?”

“Why do you keep changing the subject?”

Kuvira groaned, and pinched her brow with her fingers. “Spirits, Asami. Won’t you just let it drop?”

Asami shook her head. “I think you’re hiding something.” 

Suddenly, a look of anger flashed across Kuvira’s usually calm and composed features. 

“Oh yeah? Well, I could say the same of you.”

Asami straightened, a flash of indignation and anger - made all the stronger by the underlying guilt - raced through her mind and body. Taking a deep and steady breath, she squared her shoulders.

“What is that supposed to mean?” Asami questioned, her tone cool and distant. 

“You know exactly what it means,” Kuvira replied harshly.

Asami lowered her gaze, suddenly too uncomfortable to meet the eyes of the woman in front of her. “And that is?”

“Korra,” Kuvira spat out. 

One simple word, and Asami felt her stomach drop, her mind racing with the multitudes of implication Kuvira’s simple declaration seemed to make. 

“What about her?” Asami slowly and carefully asked. 

“Asami. It’s obvious you have feelings for her. I have to ask... Do you even care about me?”

Asami worked her mouth as her mind raced to come up with something to say. The conversation had derailed so quickly that she was having trouble keeping up. How had this whole thing started anyways?

“You’re trying to distract me,” Asami ground out. “You’re up to something, and you don’t want me to-”

“No! I mean it. Why did you agree to go out with me? Was I only meant as distraction?”

“Kuvira. Stop!”

“Answer the question, Asami!”

Asami threw up her hands. “What do you want me to say?!”

Kuvira’s jaw flexed as she ground her teeth together. “I want you to agree to go out with me again! I want you to tell me that I haven’t been an idiot in thinking that we actually share a connection.”

“Of course you’re not an idiot. But-”

“Then let me take you out tonight!”

“And why does that have to be tonight?! Why are you pressuring me like this?”

“Because I need to know that you have stronger feelings for me than you do for her.”

Asami growled in frustration, guilt making the anger pooling in Asami’s chest stronger than it had any right to be. “Kuvira. I already told you. I love Korra. She’s my best friend. You can’t expect me to-”

“But we both know that’s not the only way you feel about her, is it?”

Asami shut her mouth with a snap. While she had already suspected that Kuvira had guessed about her feelings for the Avatar, she absolutely wasn’t ready to vocalize them like this. Especially under these circumstances. 

“Kuvira. You need to drop this. Now.” Asami’s voice had gone hard and cold, and Kuvira’s eyes narrowed at the tone. 

For a moment, the two women just stared at each other, Kuvira’s countenance getting steadily darker and darker with every passing second. When Asami refused to break the silence, Kuvira suddenly swore, taking a giant step forward and pinning Asami against the wall in between her strong arms. Asami flinched at the hard expression on the taller woman’s face, but refused to back down.

“I know you feel the connection we have. I know it. And you’re a smart girl. You know how rare this is.”

Asami opened her mouth with a reply, but Kuvira cut her off. 

“Korra will never feel the same way about you as I do. You must know this.”

Asami found herself shaking her head, but Kuvira was relentless. She closed the gap between them, pressing her body flush against hers, thoroughly pinning Asami against the wall. 

“You will never have this with her. She will never do this to you. With you. For you.” As Kuvira spoke, she dipped her head, hissing the words into the crook of Asami’s neck. Asami sharply drew a breath at the sensation of the other woman’s words, hot against her skin. She raised her hands to Kuvira’s shoulders and pushed, desperate to get this woman off her so she wouldn’t have to feel these things and hear these words. 

She’s wrong. She doesn’t know anything, Asami chanted to herself. 

“Just let her go, Asami. Stop chasing after what you can’t have and appreciate what’s right in front of you,” Kuvira cooed, ghosting her lips up the column of Asami’s throat, finally resting at the shell of her ear.

A shiver raced down her spine, and Asami squeezed her eyes, trying to swallow past the lump in her throat. In a distant recess of her mind, Asami was aware that it was stupid to let what the other woman was saying and doing get to her, but she was echoing so precisely the fears that had been running through her head that the heiress was helpless. Asami pushed harder against Kuvira’s shoulders and started to shake her head. 

“Kuvira. Please… Please sto-”

Kuvira silenced the rest of Asami’s sentence as she sharply turned her head and captured Asami’s lips with her own. Before Asami could fully register what was happening, Kuvira wrapped both her arms around Asami’s body and was tightly holding her in place, deepening the kiss. 

Asami’s mind reeled at the sensation. Unlike the chaste kisses they had shared after their date, this one was hard and demanding. Kuvira’s lips and tongue practically forced her mouth open, and Asami heard a small sound escape the back of her throat, though she honestly couldn’t have said whether it was in encouragement or protest. 

Asami’s mind was completely blank as Kuvira’s lips moved against her own, and while she wasn’t exactly kissing her back, she definitely wasn’t doing everything she could have to stop it. However, none of this became relevant as both women were shocked apart by a strangled cry. Asami whipped her head around and felt her heart fall to the floor. 

Sitting in the hallway, mere feet away from where she stood, was Korra.

Korra’s eyes were wide, and Asami could see the Avatar’s hands were shaking. Opal stood behind Korra in equal shock. It was extremely clear that both of them had seen everything.

Both Korra and Asami seemed to break out of their trance at the same time. Korra grabbed the wheels of her chair and turned herself around, wheeling herself down the hallway with surprising speed.

Without a thought, Asami roughly shoved Kuvira away from her, racing after the retreating Avatar. Opal quickly stepped out of the way as Asami barrelled past, barely aware of the presence of the slight airbender in her haste to catch up. 

“Korra!” Asami yelled out.

Korra ignored her.

“Korra, wait!” Asami yelled out again.

She drew level with the Avatar and tried to place a hand on Korra’s shoulder. Korra angrily shook it off, continuing her frantic mission to put as much distance between herself and Asami as possible.

Asami felt her heart break as she tried to get Korra to stop and listen, but Korra wouldn’t hear it. She just kept wheeling herself away until they were both in the courtyard.

“Korra. Please. Let me explain!” Asami begged.

Korra finally stopped, though it was obvious that it was less because she wanted to talk, and more because her arms couldn’t handle taking her any further.

Asami tried again to place her hand on Korra’s arm, but the Avatar angrily wrenched it away, glaring icy daggers up at Asami in a way she had never experienced directed her way.

“Please! Just hear me out,” Asami pleaded, the words coming out jagged and harsh as though they were ripped from her soul. Though all she wanted was for Korra to stop and listen, she realized with a panic that she had no idea what she was going to say. 

Korra released Asami from her stare and began looking around with wide and wild eyes. Her chest was heaving, and Asami was suddenly very afraid. She had never seen Korra act this way, especially not towards her.

Asami opened her mouth to say something, but Korra abruptly threw up her hand, wordlessly begging Asami to stay silent.

Korra squeezed her eyes shut, and the silence seemed to stretch on for an eternity, small pieces of Asami’s heart crumbling to the floor with every agonizing second.


	12. Chapter 12

Korra

Korra shut her eyes and tried to slow her breathing. Her heart was pounding painfully in her ears, and when she reached up to brush her hair out of her face, her hands were shaking so badly she almost poked herself in her eye.

Asami was kissing Kuvira. Asami kissed Kuvira. Kuvira and Asami kissed.

The mantra was playing over and over in her mind, and the image of Asami wrapped in Kuvira’s arms, their mouths locked together, was branded into Korra’s brain. Eyes open or closed, that was all she could see.

Asami was standing as if frozen in place, her advance and pleading halted by Korra’s hand, begging her to stop so Korra had a moment to think. To process.

Taking another deep breath, Korra opened her mouth, but all that came out was a strangled squeak. She coughed to clear her throat and tried again, but still no sound would come out.

Asami was kissing Kuvira. Asami kissed Kuvira. Kuvira and Asami kissed.

“You…” Korra started. No other words came to her mind, so she squeezed her eyes shut one more time, trying to piece together a coherent sentence.

“She…”

“Korra, I’m sorry you saw that. I didn’t wan-”

“STOP!” Korra yelled out.

Asami jumped and closed her mouth with a snap. Korra could see tears in the corners of her friend’s eyes.

“Just… stop,” Korra said a little softer. “Just… Give me a second.”

Asami nodded and shakily backed up until she reached one of the stone benches in the courtyard and sat.

Korra crossed her arms over her chest and pinched the bridge of her nose with her fingers. She tried wading through the multitudes of thoughts and emotions that were swirling through her chest, but the second she tried to grab onto anything, a curious ringing would start in her head, and all she could envision was a thick grey fog that seemed to weigh her down.

“She… kissed you,” Korra stated. She said the words slowly and they felt alien on her tongue. It wasn’t a question, but Asami still nodded.

“Yes, but it’s not what you think!” Asami hastily responded.

Korra took a few deep breaths before replying. “Then… what… was it?”

Asami shut her eyes and raised her hands to her face, pressing her palms into her eyes with a force that looked like it was probably painful.

“I didn’t want it.”

The vision of the two women ghosted through Korra’s minds eye. It certainly hadn’t looked like Asami hadn’t wanted it… Korra groaned and sucked in a deep breath. 

“So… She just… kissed you... For no reason?” 

Asami groaned, never removing her hands from her face. She doubled over on the bench, and rested her elbows heavily on her knees.

“Have you two… Did you… is that something you’ve done before?”

The more Korra spoke, the easier it became. The fog was starting to lift a little in her brain as well, though the feelings she was left with were a confusing swirl of pain and anger. She didn’t understand why seeing Asami in the arms of another woman was quite so devastatingly crushing, but Korra couldn’t remember a time when she felt more emotionally hurt.

“Korra… I need you to understand.”

“Please, just answer the question.”

Asami took a deep breath, and slowly sat up straight. “Can you be a little more specific please?”

“IS THAT THE FIRST TIME YOU KISSED HER!?” Korra roared.

Asami winced and lowered her head. Her lack of denial was answer enough, and for the second time that day, Korra felt as though the wind had been knocked out of her.

Asami’s face crumpled in despair, and the tears at the corners of her eyes finally spilled over and raced down her satin cheeks. Korra felt a resounding pang in her chest. Even as livid as she was in that moment, the sight of Asami hurting was nearly unbearable to watch.

“Korra. I wanted to tell you. I was goin-”

“Do you have feelings for her?” Korra interrupted again.

Asami’s eyes went wide, and she hastily shook her head. She stood and rushed over to where the Avatar sat, but Korra wasn’t able to stop herself from recoiling at the advance. Asami winced and stopped, dropping her hand limply to her side.

“No. No, I don’t have feelings for her,” Asami said, her voice weak and small.

The sight of Asami’s absolute anguish was suddenly too much, and Korra bent over in her chair, pressing her hands forcefully to her face. She pressed and pressed, rocking shakily back and forth, trying to will the image of Kuvira’s greasy hands all over Asami out of her mind, but the memory wouldn’t fade.

“Korra. Please… I’ve been wanting to tell you…” Asami’s voice trailed off into silence.

Korra continued to rock in her chair. “Tell me what, Asami?”

Asami let out a strangled sounding groan. “To tell you about… about me.”

When Korra didn’t say anything back, Asami continued.

“I… I don’t just like boys. Sometimes I like girls, too. I…”

“So is that what this is? You like Kuvira?”

“No! That’s not…” Asami drew in a stuttering breath that caught more than once on the hint of a sob. “Please Korra… I really need to you to understand...”

Korra growled and ripped her hands away from her face. “Why? Why do you need me to understand?”

Asami balked at the outburst, and worked her mouth. “Korra. You’re… You’re my best friend… I need-”

“Why does that matter?!” Korra yelled back. “Why do you care so much what I think?!”

Asami let out another strangled sound and reached out. Korra flinched and Asami began to cry in earnest. “Korra. What you think matters so much.”

“But WHY!?”

Korra’s breath was becoming increasingly ragged, and she noticed with distant shame that there were tears in her eyes as well. Why was she reacting this way? Why was she so upset? Was it really that big of a deal? Korra strained to come up with answers to these questions, but every time she delved into it, the image of Kuvira’s mouth pressed intimately against Asami’s would flood her thoughts, making her feel extremely sick to her stomach.

“Dammit, Asami!” Korra yelled out.

“Korra… Please…”

Korra took a deep breath, and when she released it, all the fight left her with it. She slumped in her chair, suddenly more exhausted than she could recall ever feeling before.

“Asami…”

The heiress looked up hopefully at Korra’s softer tone. Korra slumped even further into her chair.

“Do whatever you want. My opinion doesn’t matter. If you wanna kiss… or date… or whatever it is you are doing with Kuvira, go right ahead.”

“Korra, that’s not what I want!” Asami shook her head fervently and took a hesitant step forward. When Korra didn’t recoil, she completed the distance and hesitantly placed a hand on Korra’s arm. “I don’t want Kuvira. That was-” Asami said, her voice barely a whisper. Korra cut her off.

“I don’t care, Asami.” Korra turned her head to the side and stared with sightless eyes into the courtyard. “You shouldn’t either.” 

Never before had she felt so hollow and empty.

“Korra! But I do! I care so, so much.”

“Why, Asami?”

“I told you… You’re my best friend.”

Korra groaned and doubled over, pressing her palms once more to her eyes. “Well, as your best friend, I’m telling you I don’t care.”

“Korra don’t do this. Please. Just… LOOK AT ME!”

Korra wearily lifted her head, and locked eyes with Asami. The pain staring back at her was like a punch to the stomach. Even with tears spilling down her cheeks and makeup smudged around her eyes, she was easily the most beautiful woman Korra had ever seen. Like a bolt of ugly lightning, the image of that face pressed against Kuvira’s flashed through Korra’s mind, and her stomach rolled at the memory.

“Just… drop it Asami.”

“I won’t!”

“DAMMIT! WHY?!”

“BECAUSE I’M IN LOVE WITH YOU!”

Korra’s head snapped up so fast she felt a pinch in her neck. Asami’s eyes had gone as wide as saucers, and she raised a hand to her mouth in mortification. Korra felt her mouth drop open, and her heart skipped several beats causing a painful ache in her chest. Asami took a stumbling step backwards, almost tripping over the bench as it pressed into the back of her knees. Korra had no idea how long they just stared at each other, but neither was remotely capable of speech.

Korra drew in a ragged breath and worked her mouth, trying to weed through the ringing in her ears for something… anything to say back.

Asami didn’t give her the chance.

With a strangled sob, Asami turned on her heel and bolted out of the courtyard, nearly colliding with Opal and Kuvira as she hastily ran from the scene. Kuvira caught Asami as she stumbled, and for a moment, the two women just stared at each other before Asami wrenched her arms out of Kuvira’s hold and fled.

Kuvira looked over at Korra. Korra stared back. 

Korra couldn’t begin to guess what the look on the other woman’s face meant, but in that moment, Korra honestly couldn’t find it in herself to care. Kuvira’s lips pressed together in an angry scowl, and then she too turned on her heels and walked away, her pace clipped and quick. 

Opal looked with confusion as the two women made their hasty retreat, though when she turned back and saw the look on Korra’s face, she immediately rushed over in concern.

“Are you okay?” Opal asked.

Korra couldn’t respond. She stared at the doorway through which Asami and Kuvira had disappeared. Her vision started to go a little black around the edges, and Korra hastily pulled in a deep breath.

“Korra?” Opal gently prodded again.

Korra mechanically turned her head and looked at Opal in confusion. Everything was fuzzy and indistinct, and she suddenly felt like she was going to be sick.

“Korra, Grandma Toph is waiting. But if you want to wait untill… If you want to talk about what just happ-”

“No!” Korra said, finally finding her voice. The word sounded strange to her own ears; almost as though someone else was speaking it.

“No. Let’s get this over with.”

Opal gently placed her hand on the Avatar’s forehead, and Korra hastily shook it off. “You don’t look so good... I don’t know if - ”

“I’m fine. Let’s go.”

Opal gave Korra one last concerned glance, then reluctantly nodded.

As Opal was wheeling her away, Korra had only one distinct thought. She sincerely hoped the healing would be as painful as Toph’s touch had been the night before. The thought was masochistic, but maybe then the pain in her heart would finally be drowned out.


	13. Chapter 13

Asami ran a trembling hand over the dusty banister and looked around the room with sightless eyes. The old Sato mansion was in ruins as no one had bothered to keep up the maintenance since she had ceased living there in the wake of her father’s deception. As the heiress passed through the main dining hall, she absently kicked a few empty cans lying on the floor. Asami winced when she saw the graffiti that covered the walls in streaks of blues, greens, and pinks melting down the sides of the once grand room. As bothered as she was, most of her thoughts were turned inwards doing everything she could to bank the horrible ache that was in her chest. 

She had lost Korra. Lost everything. She had seen it in Korra’s eyes; the hurt and confusion. The disgust. Asami futilely wiped the back of her hand across her face to clear it of the tears that had been a continual stream down her face for the past few hours, but she knew it was hopeless. The dam was broken, and Asami was sure the crying was nowhere near finished.

After her hasty and ill executed confession, Asami had jumped on the first boat she’d seen to race her way back to Republic City. Not knowing where else to go, she had made her way to her old home. My only home, Asami thought bitterly to herself. There was no way she’d be able to continue staying on Airbender Island. Not after what had just happened. Exhaling in a rush that ended on a choked sob, Asami made her way outside. 

The once beautiful back garden was also in shambles, and the dying remains of a bonfire were still smoldering in the shallow end of the pool. Asami picked her way through the overgrown shrubs and garbage that littered the vast expanse of her backyard over to her old workshop. Seeing that the lock and chain were still intact, Asami let out a sigh of relief. Vandals had desecrated her childhood home, but thankfully her sanctuary looked as though it had remained untouched.

Using the key she kept secured on a chain around her neck, Asami let herself into the workshop and surveyed the room inside. A think layer of dust had settled over every surface, but most of the machinery and vehicles had been covered by thick tarps, and Asami knew that they probably only needed minimal work to restore them to working condition. As the heiress picked her way through the cluttered and dirty room, she idly ran her fingers along every surface she passed, letting the onslaught of memories momentarily distract her from the painful ache in her chest. Ghostly images of herself as a child tinkering with various projects and toys flitted at the edge of her vision, always supervised by the loving and protecting shadow of her father. The thought of her father brought Asami up short, and suddenly the pain in her chest became too much to bear. With a heaving sob, Asami let herself crumple to the floor, her legs suddenly too weak to support her against the overwhelming loss she felt.

So much had happened in so little time. She had lost so much. Ever since Korra had come to Republic City, Asami’s life had completely uprooted. She lost her father. Almost lost her company. Lost her boyfriend. And now, she had lost the one thing that she had come to hold onto as an anchor against the steady wave of hardship she had endured. She had almost lost Korra to Zaheer, but miraculously the Avatar had held out. Now Korra was really gone. Unbidden, the look of shock and outrage on the Avatar’s face rose to the forefront of Asami’s mind, and the heiress clutched her chest and curled in on herself at the fresh wave of pain that suddenly engulfed her. Why did I have to be so stupid? Asami violently chastised herself. Why did you let yourself feel hope at Mako’s words? Obviously he was wrong.

Asami had no idea how long she lay in the dust and dirt on the floor of her workshop letting out all the pain and anxiety that had built up, but when she stopped, it wasn’t because she was finished. The soft click of a footstep abruptly brought Asami to the present and she quickly sat up, wiping the tears from her eyes.

“Who’s there?” Asami called out in a shaky voice.

An elongated shadow began to stretch its way towards her from the front entrance, and Asami squinted against the light to see whose form it was that was making its way towards her. When Asami was able to distinguish the figure walking towards her, she frowned bitterly.

“I thought I’d find you here,” Kuvira cooed, her tone kind and gentle.

Asami fought the urge to snarl bitterly and carefully composed her face into a calm and impassive mask. There was no way she’d be able to completely hide the trace of tears that had been a continual stream down her face, but she would not show any more weakness than absolutely unavoidable to the metal bender in front of her. 

Asami nimbly jumped up to her feet and carefully maneuvered her way so that there was a large Sato mobile positioned between them. She was well aware of all the metal that surrounded them and her alarm spiked at the realization that she was in very very big trouble should Kuvira have any intentions of hurting her in any way. And the fact of the matter is Asami had no idea what Kuvira’s intentions were. That scene at the air temple had been… messy. 

“What do you want?” Asami asked in a flat and dead voice, careful to maintain her mask.

Kuvira arched her brows in concern and took a hesitant step forward. Asami mirrored the advance with a slight step of her own in the opposite direction. Kuvira frowned again but halted her advance, instead raising her hands in what was probably meant to be a calming gesture. The action only caused the irritation and alarm Asami felt to rise even further. What was Kuvira trying to do? 

“You seemed upset when you ran off. I just wanted to make sure you were okay,” Kuvira calmly explained.

Asami met Kuvira’s eyes with uncertainty. She was dimly aware of the metal bender’s presence when she had made her hasty retreat from her encounter with Korra. Who knows how long Kuvira had been standing there. Who knew what she had overheard. Kuvira’s frown deepened at the resounding silence that filled the warehouse. 

“Asami. What’s wrong?” Kuvira asked, concern lacing her tone heavily… Too heavily.

Asami squinted, and surveyed the metal bender in front of her carefully. On the surface, Kuvira was the perfect image of concern. Everything from her stance, to the way she held her hands screamed that she was worried and only wanted to help. Her eyes, though… her eyes were as cold as steel. Every smile, frown and gesture never quite reached her eyes. They were lifeless and dead, and the realization made Asami involuntarily shiver. Looks like Kuvira had heard everything. She suddenly wanted nothing more than to be as far away as possible from the metal bender in front of her. Her instincts were screaming at her that she was in danger, and Asami’s hands twitched as she inwardly cursed herself from leaving her modified equalizer glove in her room back on the island. Kuvira must have sensed Asami’s change in demeanor, for she attempted one more hesitant step forward. Asami again mirrored it with another backwards.

“I’m fine,” Asami said, her tone a little more curt than she would have liked. “I was just on my way out.”

Kuvira squinted her eyes and cocked her head to the side.

“You’re afraid of me, aren’t you?” All traces of warmth and concern were gone from Kuvira’s voice, replaced instead by a clinical and vaguely curious tone. “Interesting.” 

Asami took a careful step towards the entrance of the workshop, and Kuvira’s eyes snapped into focus. Though the Zaofu native did nothing to indicate she was going to stop Asami from continuing, the heiress stilled at the renewed gaze.

“Kuvira… I don’t… Just” Asami took a deep breath. “Not right now. Please.”

Kuvira’s face twisted sharply into a menacing scowl before she took a couple deep and calming breaths, smoothing her features into a calm and impassive mask. Asami felt a shiver run down her spine at the cold and emotionless look. When the metal bender remained silent, Asami resumed her path towards the front of the garage. Just as she drew level with the metal bender, Kuvira’s hand reached out with surprising speed and clamped tightly around Asami’s upper arm. Asami flinched at the contact and did everything she could to still her reflex to jab her palm into Kuvira’s nose and break free. Instead, she looked up into the metal bender’s face and raised an eyebrow, her mouth set into an angry frown.

“Where are you going?” Kuvira asked, her tone curt and precise.

“None of your business, Kuvira. Please, let me go.”

Asami was just able to make out the flash of anger that crossed the taller woman’s eyes before she felt the grip on her arm loosen. Kuvira quickly pulled herself together and her face morphed once more into a parody of affectionate concern. Seeing the differing and contrasting emotions playing so easily across the metal bender’s features caused the unease pooling in the pit of Asami’s stomach to twist sickeningly. Korra had been right all along. There really was something very off about this woman.

“Asami. It’s not safe to be wandering the city right now. Why don’t you come with me,” Kuvira said. It came out as more of a demand than a request, but when Kuvira extended her hand, Asami took a step back.

“I appreciate your concern, but I’ll be fine,” Asami replied, doing her best to keep the fear and anger out of her tone.

Another flash of anger crossed Kuvira’s features, but when she spoke, her tone was as even as ever.

“And where are you going to go?”

The question made Asami flinch.

Sensing she had hit a nerve, Kuvira pressed on.

“I’m guessing you don’t want to go back to the island, and your home here is in ruins. Why don’t you just come with me? I can take care of you. I can keep you safe.”

Asami took a deep and steadying breath against the wave of pain she had felt at the mention of the island, and steeled her resolve, once again erasing all emotion from her face before turning back.

“Kuvira. I’m leaving.” 

“Please, Asami. I mean it. The city isn’t a safe place right now.”

Asami managed to hold in a huff of frustration. Instead, she casually shrugged her shoulders and began walking away.

“I’ll be fine. Thank you.”

Asami was almost at the gates when she heard Kuvira call out again.

“There’s no point in going back, you know.”

Asami stilled, her heart plummeting in dread. She heard Kuvira’s footsteps getting steadily closer, but a deep sense of foreboding had settled over her at the metal bender’s words, and she needed to know what she had meant.

“What is that supposed to mean?” Asami asked.

Kuvira shrugged. “I’m assuming you were thinking about going back to the island to be with your precious Avatar. I meant what I said. There’s really no point.”

Asami’s heart painfully skipped a couple beats, and she futilely tried to calm her breathing in her sudden panic.

“What did you do?” The question came out as a growl that surprised Asami with the ferocity behind it. 

Kuvira coolly raised an eyebrow at the menacing tone, and her smirk definitely held a hint of cruelty.

“I didn’t do anything. I’m just going off of what I heard. From what I understand, it would be best for you to just forget the Avatar altogether.”

Asami’s breath caught in her throat. “Kuvira…”

“Toph’s healing didn’t go so well. My guess is that she’s not going to make it. With the Avatar gone, things are about to get really shaky. That’s why I came to find you.”

“Korra’s… She’s what?”

“Look, Asami. I meant what I said earlier. I really do care about you. I want to make sure you’re safe. So why don’t you just come–”

Asami didn’t hear the rest of what Kuvira was going to say, for she had already taken off down the street. She ran as fast as she could towards the dock, her entire being focused on getting back to the island as quickly as she could. In that moment, what had happened didn’t matter. What Korra had seen and said and done didn’t matter. What she thought didn’t matter. Asami needed to be by her side, and nothing was going to stop her. 

So intent was she on her race to the docks that she barely noticed the commotion around her as people started screaming and scrambling out of the way. When an air bison dropped out of the sky right in front of her, she was barely able to stop in time to keep from colliding with the huge animal. Atop the bison were Bolin and Opal, and both wore matching grim expressions that filled Asami’s heart with crushing dread. It looked like Kuvira hadn’t been lying after all.

“Asami…” Bolin started. 

Asami squeezed her eyes shut against the panic rising in her chest and frantically motioned for him to stop. Without saying a word, she hastily climbed onto the back of the massive creature in front of her. Before she was fully in the saddle, Opal hastily shook the reins signaling for the beast to shoot into the sky, speeding furiously back towards the island.


	14. Chapter 14

Korra was barely aware of her surroundings as she was wheeled into a small room near the infirmary. Her mind was a swirling mess and she found herself unable to hold onto any single thought for longer than the briefest of periods. Asami’s anguished face and the sight of her being intimately embraced by Kuvira flickered back and forth with a speed that was dizzying. Opal slowed to a stop next to a high wooden table, and rotated her so they were facing each other in the cramped space.

“Korra …” Opal hesitantly started.

Korra robotically turned her head to the young airbender. She couldn’t begin to guess what her face was doing in the moment, but judging by Opal’s slightly alarmed gaze, Korra guessed that she didn’t look too good.

“Korra. I’m not sure what I heard, but… Well…” Opal ran a nervous hand through her hair as she searched for something to say.

Korra was only half listening to the words, barely able to focus past the swirling mass of confusion that was pooling sickeningly in the pit of her stomach.

“If you want to talk… I mean… I don’t know if it’s the best idea for you to go through with something like this healing when you’re so…” Opal let her sentence fade, and Korra canted her head, vaguely curious as to how Opal was going to finish.

While Korra was so what? What was she? Confused? Hurt? Shocked? Those words didn’t seem big enough to describe the mass of feelings that were flashing through her body to the point of making it numb.

When Korra didn’t respond, Opal took a deep and shaky breath.

“Korra. It sounded like Asami said she was—”

Before Opal could continue, she was cut off as the wooden door slid open. Two figures entered the room. Korra could tell that there were more people behind them, but Korra didn’t care. The ache in her chest had spiked at Opal’s hesitant mention of the one thing Korra was trying the most desperately to avoid. When Asami had said she was… When she had told Korra that she was…

Korra grit her teeth and shook her head roughly, trying to fling the memory out of her head so that she could deal with it later.

Korra turned her head to survey the two people who had entered the room. Toph and Su were standing a couple feel in front of her. Su was looking at her in concern, and Toph’s head was tilted to the side in that alien way she had that made it feel as though she was looking into your very soul. Korra grit her teeth. Toph’s look made her feel transparent and weak, and the last thing she wanted at that moment was for the abrasive and blunt blind woman to open her mouth.

Taking a deep and steadying breath, Korra spoke.

“Let’s get this over with. What do you need me to do?”

Korra’s voice sounded strange to her own ears. It was as though every word were dragged across rough stone and burned to a crisp before escaping her lips. They were ragged and raw and out of the corner of her eye, the Avatar saw Opal flinch at the tone.

Both Opal and Su took a hesitant step towards the Avatar, mouths open. It was obvious they were going to voice some concern over Korra’s alarming state, but before either were able to complete their journey or say anything, Toph’s hands reached out with lightning speed and grasped both of the younger woman’s wrists. Su and Opal halted in their tracks and looked to their matriarch questioningly.

Toph looked at Korra, unnecessarily squinting her blind eyes.

“You sure you’re ready for this, Twinkle-Toes? It won’t be any easier than last night.”

Korra drew herself up as much as she could in the restricting confines of her chair, and gave the older woman the most defiant stare she could muster in her broken and defeated state.

“Just get this shit out of me.”

The raw rasp of Korra’s voice made the words come out as more of an animalistic growl, and both Su and Opal flinched. Toph however held the gaze for a moment longer, surveying Korra as though seeing her for the first time. In that moment, Korra could see that Toph understood. She could see the confusion and pain Korra was feeling. She could see that Korra was desperate for a distraction. She could see that Korra needed the healing session, but not because she wanted to regain use of her legs. She needed the pain. She needed everything to be drowned out.

After a beat of silence, Toph nodded curtly and motioned for her progeny to help Korra out of the chair and onto the rough wooden table.

Toph approached the table and lightly ran her hands along the length of Korra’s body. Everywhere her hands passed, a slight and vaguely unpleasant tingling followed. As Toph worked her way up, then back down Korra’s body, the tingling slowly intensified until it was a steady burn, and Korra grit her teeth at the uncomfortable sensation.

Toph grunted, and removed her hands. The low burn remained however, and Korra frowned as she looked up at the ancient metal bender.

“It’s really in there. This isn’t going to be a very pleasant experience,” Toph said to no one in particular.

She walked over to the foot of the table, and firmly grasped both of Korra’s feet in her hands, furrowing her brow as she concentrated on the limbs beneath her fingers.

The burn immediately intensified in Korra’s feet, and the Avatar fought the impulse to squirm in her discomfort. Toph began slowly running her hands up Korra’s legs, and the burn escalated with every rising inch.

By the time Toph had reached Korra’s thighs, the Avatar had to bite her lips to keep from crying out. It felt as though her insides were on fire, and the flame was only being stoked to a higher and higher frenzy as the metal bender worked her way up Korra’s broken body.

When she reached the Avatar’s stomach, Korra jerked violently on the table. A hand reached out and grab hers, but the hand was all wrong. It was too big. Too calloused.

Toph ghosted her hands up to Korra’s shoulders, and gently, but firmly, grasped Korra’s face between her palms, her fingers curling around the back of her neck.

Korra whimpered pitifully as the fire under her skin lapped at the sensitive underside of her throat.

Without warning, a blinding pain lanced through her skull making her gasp and arch harshly up and off the table. Dimly, Korra was aware of a couple of alarmed yells, and heard Toph roughly bark out some orders. Almost immediately she felt two hands press down on her shoulders attempting to press her back into the table, but Korra lost all control of her body.

The pain was blinding. Her vision wavered like rippling water before her eyes and a bright white light lanced through and dotted with red and sickly black began to cloud the room in front of her. An annoying ringing began to play in her ears, but when she drew in a shuddering breath, she realized it was the sound of her screaming ripping through the small room.

Toph’s grip tightened once more and the pain amped up one more impossible increment. The ringing in her ears escalated to a deafening screech as she felt her body lurch up once more, taking the people trying to hold her down with it. Her lungs stretched and pulled as she filled them to the utmost capacity before releasing it in a rush in the most deafening and anguished scream imaginable.

Her throat convulsed as she felt a thick and viscous fluid slide sickeningly over the back of her tongue. She tasted blood and bile as the material left her throat with an obscene sucking sound. Without warning, the red and black in her vision swallowed her whole.

With a sickening lurch of her stomach, Korra felt as though she was ripped from her body. The black and red quickly receded to an impossibly bright white, and all her senses save one were abruptly cut off. She was deaf and blind and dumb, with no recollection of anything other than the pain. She wasn’t Korra. She wasn’t the Avatar. She wasn’t a teenager with confusing feelings for her best friend. She wasn’t a savior, or a broken body.

She was pain.


	15. Chapter 15

The ride back to Air Temple Island was the longest of Asami’s life. While they rode, Opal filled her in on what had happened since she left. She explained that Korra had had an unexpected reaction to having the poison expelled from her body. She was feverish and sick and obviously in pain.

She was also unconscious.

Asami’s stomach twisted at the news, and by the time the sky bison landed in one of the spacious courtyards of the island, the heiress was shaking in her distress. Asami vaulted out of the saddle, stumbling a little upon impact.

Opal and Bolin were immediately at her side, helping to steady her as she threw herself forward, regaining her footing as she made her way towards where she knew the Avatar was waiting.

Asami started to make her way towards the infirmary, but Opal grabbed her shoulder and shook her head, gesturing instead to the living quarters.

“They moved her to her room. It’s bigger and everyone figured—”

Asami didn’t wait to hear the rest of the sentence, and instead took off running.

When Asami entered the room, the sight she met stopped her in her tracks.

Korra’s close friends and family were crammed in her room, all anxiously watching as Korra writhed and twisted in the sheets on her bed. Korra’s eyes were squeezed shut, her face dripping with sweat, pitiful cries and whimpers occasionally escaping her lips.

Tenzin and the rest of his family were standing stoically at the foot of the bed, and even Meelo had his eyes cast downward in dejected sorrow.

On either side of the bed, Mako and Senna sat, each trying to hold onto one of Korra’s hands as she writhed and thrashed on the bed in her feverish haze.

Su and Toph were standing in the corner trying to calm a frantic Tonraq, as he angrily demanded answers concerning his daughter’s condition.

At the sight of the blind metal bender, Asami lurched forward. She shoved Tonraq out of her way and grabbed onto the front of Toph’s robes, angrily shoving the older woman back into the wall in her sudden rage.

“What did you do!?” Asami bellowed.

The room suddenly went silent, and out of the corner of her eyes, Asami saw Su and Opal take a step towards them in alarm. 

“What. Did. You. Do?” Asami asked, her words coming out as a menacing hiss.

Toph raised a hand to still her family’s advance, returning Asami’s furious glare with a cool and calm expression.

In the back of her mind, Asami was dimly aware that she was physically assaulting one of the most powerful and renowned earth benders in history, but she didn’t care. All she knew was that Korra was hurt; Korra unconscious.

And Toph was responsible.

“Easy there, princess,” Toph said in a low growl. “I didn’t do anything that wasn’t asked of me. You all wanted the poison out? Well, the poison’s out.”

Asami made a strangled sound in the back of her throat and took a step further, shoving the older woman in the far wall once again in her rage.

“Easy there, Asami…” Tonraq murmured from beside her.

Toph raised a brow, tilting her head to the side, unflinching as she received the brunt of Asami’s rage.

When Opal took a step towards them, no one stopped her. Asami felt a hesitant hand on her arm and didn’t resist as she felt the younger woman gently pull the heiress away from her grandmother.

Asami released Toph’s robes with a hiss.

Asami didn’t resist as Opal gently led her to Korra’s side, and Mako wordlessly moved out of the way so she could take his place.

She reached out and grabbed Korra’s hand and the Avatar latched onto the limb as if her life depended on it. Her whimpering started to escalate and turned into full on cries. Asami felt the bones in her hand creak in Korra’s vice-like grip, but Asami ignored the pain and held on, helpless to do anything other than watch as the young bender began to writhe and thrash on the table with renewed force, her cries coming out as choked sobs. 

Asami felt the tears running down her face, but didn’t move to wipe the offending drops clear. With her free hand, she reached over and grabbed a rag out of a bowl that was resting on the table next to where Korra lay. She reverently smoothed the cool cloth across Korra’s feverish brow, distantly aware that the room had gone unnaturally silent behind her.

The only sounds that filled the tense air were the rustling of sheets as Korra twisted in pain and the cries and whimpers that regularly escaped her lips, helpless against whatever force was wracking her body.

Asami was just reaching up to once again wipe the Avatar’s face free of the sweat that was beading across her cheeks and brow when Korra’s body suddenly stiffened.

Asami tightened her grip around the Avatars fingers.

Without warning, Korra’s eyes flew open and her mouth spread wide in a silent scream. Her body arched harshly off the bed, her spine bending into an impossible angle.

Asami let out a choked cry, and looked around desperately for help. 

Someone needed to do something… Anything! How could everyone just sit around and watch?

“Korra! Korra… Please!” Asami cried out.

Korra didn’t respond, her face a mask of agony, her rigid body remaining in that horribly unnatural position.

Asami lept up and tried to grab onto Korra’s face to try and look her in the eyes, but as soon as she stood over the prone Avatar, Korra’s body suddenly went limp. She crashed back to the bed and her head lolled to the side. Her eyes were wide and unseeing, vivid red lines from the capillaries that had burst causing the blue of her irises to stand out eerily in stark contrast.

Korra was still. Impossibly still.

Her limbs dangled limply over the edge of the bed, her eyes open and unblinking.

Asami’s breath caught painfully in her chest as her mind tried to process what she was seeing.

A collective cry went up throughout the room, but Asami barely heard, catching only snippets.

“Is she…?”

“She… can’t be?”

“Is she breathing?”

“Toph. What did you do?!”

“What happened?”

“Is she moving at all?”

The words swirled throughout the room, buffeting Asami with the sentiment behind them.

Korra wasn’t breathing.

No. No!

Without thinking, Asami tore from the room into the adjacent room that held all her belongings. She grabbed her old equalist glove, and nearly toppled Tenzin over as she re-entered the room in which Korra’s body lie.

Unheeding of the cries of protest that were going through the room, Asami slipped the glove onto her hand and reached out. She placed her palm firmly on Korra’s chest over her still heart and pressed down, activating the electrical current.

Korra’s body lurched off the table, but re-settled, her eyes wide and lifeless.

Her limbs refused to move. Her chest remained still, the steady rise and fall of her breath notably absent.

Asami refused to give up. With a growl, she repeated the process again and again and again.

But Korra remained still.

With a heart-wrenching growl, Asami threw the glove off and started pounding at Korra’s chest, desperate to shock the stubborn organ into life.

She felt a pair of strong arms grab her from behind, and Asami thrashed against the hold.

“Asami… Asami stop!”

Asami ignored it, desperate to continue her administrations to get Korra to breathe again. To open her eyes, and to laugh and to smile and to just… be.

The arms behind her tightened and Asami realized with a sickening lurch that it was over. There was nothing more to be done.

Korra was… Korra was gone.

Asami went limp with an agonized cry that was ripped from her very soul. Whoever was holding her from behind slunk to the ground with her, tightening their grip as Asami started to shake uncontrollably.

Korra was gone.

The wracking sobs that bubbled up through Asami’s throat were painful as they tore their way through her body and past her lips.

Korra was gone.

The arms tightened even more, and Asami realized that she had started rocking violently back and forth in her anguish.

Korra was gone.

Asami had no idea how much time passed. It could have been seconds. It felt like days. All she could see was Korra’s lifeless body lying limply on the table before her.

Korra was gone.

Asami was dimly aware of muffled cries and sobs of the other inhabitants of the room. Eventually even those died down.

Korra was gone. Korra was gone. Korra was—

Without warning, Korra’s body arched up once more, her eyes bright with the Avatar glow.

Everyone looked on in disbelief and wonder as Korra’s mouth dropped open, and she drew in a long and rattling breath.

For a moment, time seemed to stop. Then Korra’s body jerked and she threw her arms to the side, her body virtually exploding from the light within.

Asami gasped in disbelief as the light from Korra’s eyes raced across her face, down her neck and chest and around her arms and legs.

Asami could just make out the faint outline of water-tribe designs, airbender tattoos, and flames flickering in the light across the Avatars bare arms. The elemental symbols of the four nations burned in a bright emblem on Korra’s chest and slowly morphed into the runic markings that resembled those she had seen in pictures taken of Unalaq when he had been trying to destroy Republic City as a Dark Avatar. However, instead of the evil maroon and gold, the emblem was etched in blue and silver and rippled with a flickering intensity across the young woman’s chest.

Asami threw the arms off from around her in her haste to scramble up so she could get a better look.

The glow emanating from Korra’s body pulsed through the room in a rippling wave, its pattern a steady throb that mimicked a slowly beating heart.

As the light intensified, Korra’s body slowly lifted off the table until she was floating several inches off the surface. Her back was bowed backwards and her hair hung in a loose sheet around her head, fluttering in a wind that no one could feel.

The light brightened even further until Asami and everyone else in the room had to shield their eyes from the blinding glare before them.

Asami felt a curious humming in her chest as the light seemed to penetrate her body, permeating throughout every pore and gasped as she felt the tendrils coil around her insides. She felt light, and love and joy and every other imaginably wonderful sensation. In her mind, she saw with stark clarity a reliving of every moment of joy she had experienced in her short but eventful life. By the collective gasp she dimly heard in the background, she guessed that everyone else was experiencing much of the same thing.

She saw her mother’s smiling face. Heard her father’s joyous laughter. She felt the exhilaration of her first time in a Satomobile, and her stomach fluttered at the recollection of her first kiss.

Then she saw Korra.

Asami gasped as she was flooded with memory after memory of Korra’s smiling face. She felt her body grow warm as she was flooded with the love she felt for the young bender, and tears pooled in her eyes as she was confronted with the depths of the feelings she held for the Avatar.

A pleasant ringing began to ripple throughout the room, emanating from Korra’s floating figure. The ringing resonated, bouncing off the walls and filling the room and everyones body until they were part of the sound, linked by the curious tone that hung heavy in the air.

For a split second, Asami felt it.

She felt everyone. Everything. Every beating heart in the room suddenly synced, and every breath became one. She could feel every presence in the room as if they were a part of her. They were a part of her. She was a part of them. The inter-connectivity of everyone’s life force suddenly became so clear, so obvious; Asami was unable to choke back the sob of joy and elation she felt.

When the joyous ringing in the room had reached a pitch that was so intense it was almost too much, the energy in the room shifted.

The light and sound pulsed heavily once.

Twice.

A third time.

Then…

WHOOSH

All light and sound suddenly retreated, sucking back on itself in a rush that made Asami’s ears pop. The light crashed back into Korra’s body with a deafening clap.

Korra’s body burned so bright, she was impossible to see beyond a vague shadow of a silhouette in the blinding light as she lowered gently back to the bed.

Then it was over.


	16. Chapter 16

There was no way to know how much time passed. The pain just kept coming. It moved through Korra with a life of its own. It flared and pulsed with irregular textures, sometimes crashing through her like a wave, other times lighting her up like fire. Sometimes, the agony would ripple along her spine as though every muscle in her back were ripping apart, and other times it would pierce through her skull like a skillfully wielded dagger.

My name is Korra. I am the Avatar. I am from the Southern Water tribe. My parents are Tonraq and Senna. I was raised by the White Lotus. It is my duty to protect, serve, and maintain balance in the world.

Korra had started chanting this mantra over and over, desperate to fight back against the pain that was stripping away her sanity.

It was as if a symphony of pain was being played on her body. There was no rest, no fermata after the crescendo. The music just continued to build, exquisite in its never ending torment. An endless lesson in the various textures of pain.

My name is Korra. I am the Avatar. I am from the Southern Water tribe. My parents are Tonraq and Senna.

The blinding white that had largely dominated her vision since the agony started suddenly flew outwards, appearing at the end of an impossibly long tunnel.

The darkness threatened to swallow her whole, and Korra desperately searched her mind for something to hold on to. Her grasp on who, and what, she was, slowly slipping like sand through a sieve.

My name is Korra. I am the Avatar.

The pain shifted. Instead of spikes or daggers, it transformed to a steady vibration of waves coming in increasingly faster intervals. Eventually her whole being was pulsing with it.

My name is…

Lightning lanced through Korra’s body with a violent crash. Every muscle in her body spasmed, and she felt a sickening lurch as the larger muscles in her back and legs tore with an audible riiiiiip. Korra desperately hoped the sound was just in her head.

With a dizzying flash, Korra found herself standing in a dingy and dirty hallway.

She didn’t need to look around to figure out where she was. Her nightmares visited this place often enough for her to immediately recognize her surroundings.

Sure enough, when she looked up, she could see herself kneeling in the dirt and grime on the floor, held in place by the blood that coursed through her veins.

Amon stood over Korra’s body, a calloused hand roughly grabbing onto her wolf-tail, yanking her head back so she had no choice but to looked helplessly into his impassive mask.

There was no mercy. No compassion. Just coldness.

Sensing the inevitable, Korra snapped her eyes shut, praying with all her might for salvation.

Korra would never forget how it felt when that thumb brushed across her forehead. The touch itself was nothing special. It was barely a caress.

But with the touch, her insides had twisted so sharply, so… severely; even without the blood bending, she would have been unable to move.

All the air was forced out of her lungs as though her chest had been violently squeezed by a vice.

Korra felt her muscles slacken as Amon released his hold on her life force, and Korra was unable to do anything to soften the blow as her body crumpled to the floor in a heap.

“I told you I would destroy you,” Amon hissed, his usually cold and calculating voice colored with smug vindication.

Amon had broken her bending. Unalaq had broken her soul. As soon as her thoughts slid to the fight with Unalaq’s Dark Avatar, she found herself there. 

She was kneeling, the ground of the Spirit World pressing harshly up against her shins as darkness incarnate reached out to caress her face. It spilled out of Unalaq’s eyes and mouth like an oil slick, colors dancing on the edge of a dark and sickly spectrum. The twisting tendrils snaked out with lightning speed, silencing her fiery breath as she tried to keep the darkness at bay.

It was too late. He was too strong.

The feeling of Vaatu sliding into her through her mouth and nose was beyond anything she could have imagined. She could feel the essence of both the man and the spirit climbing into the deepest recesses of her soul, invading everything that made Korra who and what she was. When the tendrils of the Dark Avatar began to wrap around her connection to Raava, the world suddenly felt wrong.

Korra’s world stopped when she felt her connection with the light spirit sever. The slow drag that separated the two souls seemed to last eternity.

To be honest, Korra didn’t remember when Raava had been wrenched out of her body, or how Vaatu had slipped back into his host.

But she did remember the sting of Unalaq’s water bending. 

That first strike had been ruthless. The rest were relentless. 

One by one, her past lives were wiped clean, blown away like smoke in the wind.

And it hurt.

The pain was surprising, disorienting, because it lacked a source. It hovered at the edge of Korra’s existence, lancing through her soul in sporadic, irregular intervals.

Korra closed her eyes and screamed out her frustration, instinctively trying to pull her arms into her chest to curl around the aching pain that lashed relentlessly at her heart.

A harsh metallic click and sting at her wrists stopped the movement.

Korra’s eyes flew open in panic.

No!

The absolute terror she felt as she fully registered the harsh bite of the metal cutting into her wrists and the sharp ache in her shoulders as her weight pulled down on her back and arms in an unnatural way was every bit as overwhelming as it had been the first time. 

Korra shook and screamed in protest, exhaling her rage and terror in a searing pillar of flame, desperate to end the nightmare before it began.

She grit her teeth against the sob rising in her chest as she felt the ghostly agony of the metal poison being forced through her pores.

She shook with the effort it took to fight back her body’s reflex to go into the Avatar State.

She felt the sickening lurch in her stomach as her whole being gave into the almost animalistic instincts of a spirit when threatened.

She relived every fall, every hit, every blow of her ensuing fight with Zaheer.

She gasped as the air was forcibly ripped from her lungs and cried out when her defeated body finally collapsed, feeling every torn muscle and broken bone with renewed force as it slammed brutally against the unmerciful ground.

Korra blinked furiously, trying to clear her vision as a figure blurrily swam into view.

The loving face of her father and the harsh and cold lines of Toph’s profile flickered back and forth as though trying to merge into one.

Korra felt her body convulse violently, and suddenly the pain was back.

Too much! It’s too much… Korra thought. I can’t… I’m going to…

For a second time, she tasted bile and blood in the back of her throat, however the substance that came snaking out of her open mouth was thicker and infinitely more foul than the metallic poison that had twice been purged of her system. 

Korra coughed and sputtered as a thick tar-like material slithered its way out of her throat. Her eyes burned and nose itched. She realized with horror that the tar was oozing out of her ears and eyes and nose and throat, blocking off all airways and making her head spin as she reeled from the lack of oxygen.

The swirling black mess coalesced in front of her face, gradually gaining mass as it was purged from her body.

As it grew, it rose up in front of her, a large and swirling column of black and maroon smoke that shone with a luminescent glow. Flashes of bronze were the only source of light as an oppressive darkness swallowed them both.

The menacing figure blurred as it zoomed closer, a single diamond drawing level with her eyes, piercing her with its omniscient gaze.

Then…

Nothing.

Just like that, everything stopped.

The pain. The light.

There was nothing. She was nothing. The darkness around her was nothing.

Silence. Oblivion. Peace.

In a moment that lasted a lifetime, all that existed was the void.

Eyes that were not eyes, looked around. Ears that were not ears, strained to hear.

There was nothing to be seen. Nothing to be heard. There were no eyes to see. No ears to hear.

A low hum began to resonate in the depths of infinity.

The vibrations flickered as particles of matter winked into existence with rapidly building speed.

It was negligible at first.

Then, with a dizzying shift, nothing suddenly became… something.

The void was suddenly filled with small specks of light, the surrounding darkness a thick and rich dark blue that wavered and flickered in hundreds of differing hues.

Korra… Listen to me. Listen to my voice.

And thus she had ears.

Korra. Look at me.

And thus she had eyes.

Korra looked around, trying to gain her bearings in her new surroundings.

She was nowhere. She was everywhere.

The space around her stretched out towards infinity, but never quite made it. It was oppressive, unexpectedly claustrophobic, yet somehow unimaginatively open and expansive at the same time. Lines of power throbbed through the air just beyond hearing, just beyond sight. There were no words to describe where she was, and trying to find them warped the space around her as if it actively resisting being labeled.

Come back to me, Korra. Speak to me.

Korra looked around with wide eyes, searching for the origin of the voice that resonated throughout the empty space around her in a ghostly whisper.

“Where… Where am I?” Korra rasped out.

The sound of Korra’s voice didn’t come from her mouth. It was more that she thought the words, and they somehow manifested themselves in a rippling wave that radiated outward from her body.

For a while, nothing happened. Then, Korra noticed a slight difference in the textures of space out of the corner of her eye. When she turned to look, wisps of smoke and light swirled up in a light vortex, spinning up and around, finally settling to reveal a small and slight figure.

Korra looked down at the small body, waiting for the details and definition that would give a hint as to who it was to settle. When they finally did, Korra frowned in confusion.

The small figured frowned back.

Korra worked her mouth, trying to think of something to say. Her mind had gone completely blank, for floating in front of her was a small and perfect replica of herself. Only younger. Much much younger.

Were she to guess, Korra would have said the younger version of herself couldn’t have been more than six years old.

“What’s wrong?” Young Korra asked, tilting her head to the side and scrunching her face in blatant curiosity.

“I’m… Who… Who are you?” Korra asked, finally getting her voice to work. Unlike before, the sound came from her mouth. Her throat was dry and hurt from all of the screaming and the slight ache confused her. If she was in the Spirit World, the pain didn’t make sense. Unless she visited in her physical body, pain wasn’t something you experienced in the spirit world.

Young Korra scrunched her nose and giggled. “That’s a silly question. I’m you, of course. But you already knew that.” She tilted her head to the side, appraising Korra with a curious stare. “Why are you so sad?”

Korra blinked in confusion, as much thrown by fact that she was talking to a younger version of herself as the abrupt change in topic.

As Korra considered the question, her surroundings began to swirl and twist. They both sank gently through the air and landed on a ground that manifested beneath their feet. The sky lightened and expanded outwards, and the colors around her shifted and warped until it appeared that both of them were standing in a vast field of short cut grass.

“What do you mean?” Korra asked absentmindedly, looking around to survey her new surroundings. It was obvious she was somewhere in the Spirit World, but she had never seen anything quite like it. The Spirit World was usually full of life and light. This place felt… dead.

“You’re sad,” Young Korra stated. “Why?”

Korra ripped her eyes from the landscape and surveyed the youngster in front of her. The child had cocked one of her hips and was resting both hands on her waist, her posture and demeanor screaming that she clearly thought she was talking to an idiot.

Korra rolled her eyes at the sight before crouching down so she and the youngster were more-or-less at the same eye level.

“Well, I’ve been really hurt. They were trying to help me get better, and somehow I-”

“How did you get hurt?” Young Korra interrupted.

Korra closed her mouth with a snap and fought the urge to groan in annoyance. Had she really been this annoying when she was younger?

“Well… Some bad people were trying to do bad things. When I was trying to stop them, I got hurt,” Korra patiently explained.

“Why are the people bad?” Young Korra immediately fired back.

Korra threw up her hands in frustration. “I don’t know. They’re just bad people.”

Her patience was quickly starting to run out. All she wanted was to figure out how to get back to the real world, and she was stuck trying to explain her situation to an annoying toddler.

Young Korra frowned and tilted her head to the side with a thoughtful expression.

“That doesn’t make any sense. They have to be bad for a reason.”

“You’re too young to understand,” Korra said with an irritated sigh. 

Young Korra continued to frown and walked forward until she was nearly nose to nose with her older form. Korra resisted the impulse to squirm under the suddenly intense gaze of her younger self.

“No, Korra,” the small child began, reaching out a chubby hand towards Korra’s face. “I think you are.”

Young Korra’s fingers brushed lightly against Korra’s forehead and her world exploded in a flash of bright white light. When she managed to blink the stars from her vision, she found herself back in a dingy dark hallway. Korra wrenched her body away from the youngster in front of her and spun around.

Sure enough, Amon was towering over a memory form of Korra’s arched and kneeling body, his thumb poised menacingly over her forehead.

“No! Stop!” Korra yelled out, unwilling to relive the memory again so soon.

Surprisingly, everything around Korra abruptly stuttered to a sudden halt. The image before her froze, and even the swirling motes of dust in the air stayed suspended in place.

Korra shakily walked towards the two figures in the hallway, walking around them in awe. Amon’s hand had stopped mid-descent, and Korra’s previous self’s mouth was wrenched open in a terrifying scream, though she knew that in reality no sound had ever had the chance to escape.

Korra felt the brush of fabric against her thigh, and when she looked down, Young Korra was looking up at her with a thoughtful expression.

“What… What is this?” Korra asked, experimentally lifting a hand to wave it in front of the faces of the memories in front of her.

Nothing happened.

“Is this the bad man you were talking about?” Young Korra asked.

“No… Yes… Well. Kind of. He did hurt me. But it was a long time ago. How are you doing this?” Korra asked, gesturing to the space around her.

Young Korra shrugged, then pointed up at Amon’s masked face.

“So why is he a bad man?” The youngster asked.

Korra wrenched her eyes off of the scene in front of her, and turned her gaze to the child by her side.

“He hurt a lot of people. He could take people’s bending away. He took my bending away.”

“So he’s a bad man because he hurt you?”

Korra huffed in frustration, her earlier irritation with the youngster once again flaring up.

“No. He was bad before that. He—”

“When did he become a bad man?”

“Look. You’re too young to understand. He was too powerful. He could do things no one else could!”

“So can you.”

“Yeah. But that’s different. I’m the Avatar. Plus, he abused his power.”

Young Korra absently started picking her ear, her face the perfect mask of boredom. “And so did you.”

Korra blanched at the blatant accusation in the child’s voice, but when she opened her mouth to argue, one of the walls of the hallway suddenly blew outwards. It revealed a scene of Korra playing with the air bender children on Air Temple Island, racing along the walkways on balls of finely woven air. Just as she was about the cross the finish line, Korra saw her previous self’s eyes glow with the Avatar State’s ghostly gleam, and she darted past the competition to come in first.

As the scene in front of her faded back into a wall, Korra felt her cheeks burn in embarrassment and frustration.

“That’s not the same thing,” she growled out.

“It’s not?” Young Korra asked, her brows drawn in confusion. “Cause you said—”

“I know what I said,” Korra snapped, her tone a bit harsher than she had intended. “And that doesn’t count! I was just playing then. What Amon did was different.”

“How was it different?”

“He was using his powers for evil!”

“What was he doing that was so evil?” Young Korra was now carefully studying her finger, seemingly unsure what to do with it now that the tip was covered in goo. 

“He had this stupid idea that the only way for everyone to be equal, everyone’s bending needed to be taken away.”

“So he was trying to make everyone equal?” Young Korra said with an innocent tilt of her head. 

Korra grit her teeth. “Yeah! Wait! No! AHH!”

“You’re right, Korra. He really does sound like a bad man.” The child’s voice positively was dripping in sarcasm. 

Korra whipped her head around and growled in anger and frustration.

“Look, kid! You don’t know what you’re talking about. He—”

Korra was cut off as her surroundings blurred around her. 

When everything settled, Korra again found herself if the desolate landscape surrounding the tree of time in the spirit world. Several feet in front of her, she could see herself fighting off Unalaq as he was overwhelming her with Vaatu’s powerful presence. However, she could also see two blurring forms crashing through the sky as her battle with Zaheer played out above her. 

“And these two... They are bad men as well?” Young Korra asked, seemingly oblivious to the violence around her and utterly uncaring of the panic that was rising in the Avatar’s chest as two of the most terrifying moments in her life were playing out around her. 

Korra winced as she saw herself crash to the ground with bonecrushing force, her heart stuttering in her chest as the all too recent memory of the pain flashed through her mind. 

“Of… Of course they’re bad… They…”

Korra recoiled in fear as Zaheer flew down from the sky and encased the limp body on the ground in a swirling vortex, the air forming a suffocating bubble around her past self's head. 

Korra turned her head sharply to the side, unable to witness the moment that regularly haunted her dreams. She was immediately met with the sight of Vaatu’s sick presence shooting out of Unalaq’s mouth and slithering sickeningly down her other past self's throat. 

“STOP!” Korra yelled out, her hands shaking uncontrollably.

The visions around her stuttered to a halt, just like one before. 

Zaheer’s arms were frozen in the middle of his sinister bending, his victim’s mouth open, eyes wide with panic and fear. 

Unalaq’s face was split into a wide and sinister grin around the thick and vile substance protruding from his mouth, connecting to a Korra’s head, thoroughly encasing it in Vaatu’s unnatural and evil form. 

Korra took a stumbling step away from the scenes around her, falling shakily to her knees. 

Burying her face in her hands, she took a deep and shuddering breath. 

“Why… Why are you doing this?”

Instead of an answer, Korra felt a warm hand gently prying her hands off her face. Young Korra was standing in front of her, a sad but kind expression on her face. 

“You need to understand.” She pointed a finger over at Unalaq. “What did he want?”

Korra sat back and pulled her knees up to her chest. Her earlier irritation had faded in her sudden spike of anxiety and fear. It seemed that she was meant to learn something in this experience, and the sooner she understood the message, the sooner it would be over. 

“He… He wanted power. He was corrupted by Vaatu. He-”

“No! You don’t understand. What did he want? The power… Merging with Vaatu… Those were the means. What was the end?”

Korra took sighed and rested her cheek on her knees, trying to focus on anything but the terrifying images around her. 

“I don’t know. To bring back the spirits?”

Young Korra smiled, flashing her teeth in a big goofy grin. 

She then twisted around and pointed at the floating figure of Zaheer. “And what did he want?”

Korra looked up at the still and floating figure of Zaheer. 

“He… He wanted to kill me…” Korra whispered, her voice broken and hoarse. “He wanted to destroy me. He wanted to destroy everything.”

Young Korra sighed heavily and dropped to the ground, folding her legs beneath her. 

“Korra. Stop. Stop and think. What did he want?”

Korra reached up and pressed her palms to her eyes. “I don’t know. To kill all the world leaders?”

Young Korra hummed the affirmative. “And why did he want to do that?”

Suddenly Korra was fed up. She wrenched her hands away from her face and glared angrily at the child in front of her. “What are you trying to get at? Why am I here? What do you want?”

The child easily met Korra’s angry gaze, completely unaffected by the venom in her voice. 

“I’m trying to help you. You’re so busy holding onto the pain you’ve gone through, you’re completely unable to heal. You’re so stuck on holding onto this ridiculous idea of good vs. evil, black vs. white, that you’re completely missing the point of everything!”

“Oh yeah? And what point is that?”

“To learn. So what Did Zaheer really want?”

Korra threw out her arms in exasperation. “He wanted chaos! He wanted the world to exist in a world without leaders so the people were free to do whatever they wanted. He didn’t understand the need for order and-”

“Yes, Korra. That’s exactly it,” Young Korra interrupted. “He wanted freedom." The child leaned forward and pierced Korra with a serious and intense gaze. "You have gone through some really tough stuff. But really think about the men you were fighting. Amon wanted equality, Unalaq wanted the material and spirit world to be joined, and Zaheer wanted freedom. Are any of those goals really evil?”

“No. But-”

“So instead of spending so much time and energy fearing your enemies, why don’t you stop and try to learn from them. Grow from your experiences. Understand the world around you and your place in it a little better as a result of your triumphs, not in spite of them.”

Korra squinted at the child in front of her. The childish act was utterly and completely gone and the look in the youngster’s eyes belied an ageless wisdom that was suddenly very very familiar.

“Who… Who are you? Really?”

Young Korra smiled, her face radiating warmth and love. She stood and took a step closer, leaning forward until their faces were mere inches apart. 

“I told you already, Korra.” Reaching out a small hand, she gently caressed Korra’s face with her fingertips. “I’m you.”

Upon impact, the world around Korra exploded in a bright white light and she had to shield her eyes from the sudden blinding glare. When she removed her hands from her face, Raava’s regal spirit form was floating lazily in front of her, emanating waves of light and love and joy in a constant soothing stream.

Tears immediately sprang from the Avatar’s eyes as she studied the figure in front of her. “Raava,” Korra breathed out in a reverent whisper. 

Hello, Korra. It has been too long.

Korra opened her mouth to reply, but the joy and relief spreading through her body was so profound, she was unable to speak past the lump in her throat. 

Korra. You have been through so much in so little time. Your experiences have chipped and whittled away at your soul, leaving you a broken shell. It’s time to stop living in the past. It’s time to let go of your pain and move forward, learn from your mistakes and experiences so you can grow. 

The air around Korra began to shimmer and warp until it was again playing out various memories and moments in her short life. Korra saw herself growing up, always training. Always fighting. 

A steady warmth began to grow in her chest, culminating in an uncomfortable ache. 

So much of your experiences as the Avatar have been centered around vanquishing enemies. While you are undoubtedly a strong and powerful fighter, that is only half of what being the Avatar is all about. Being the Avatar isn’t only about bending or power. That’s not where your strength lies. It’s not in your ability to vanquish foes or conquer enemies. It’s not about solving political problems, or appeasing world leaders. 

The images surrounding Korra shifted to a flickering montage of happy moments she had shared with her family and friends. She suddenly felt the need to gasp in a deep breath, struggling to get as much air into her aching lungs as physically possible. 

It’s about having the ability to look at the bigger picture and lead through example. It’s about wisdom and love crossing all real and imaginary boundaries when reaching out to the people and creatures of the earth. The Avatar states no alliance, for in having an allegiance to one, they have an allegiance with all. They have no agenda for in wanting the best for no one, they want the best for everyone. And that doesn’t come from me, Korra. That comes from the people I share my life with. That comes from you. And you must learn and accept who you really are. 

Korra was distantly aware of the images around her, Asami’s face more prominent than most in the memories surrounding her. However, the observation was only fleeting as ache in her chest ramped up with a resounding pang. Korra felt a burn flash down her arms and legs and back and was just able to see the etching of Raava’s symbols race across her body before light suddenly exploded violently outward from the center of her chest.

The best way to define who you are isn’t in what you’ve done, or how strong you are. It can best be defined by the lives you have touched, and by the lives that have touched you. It is measured in the love you feel and share with those around you. 

As Raava’s signs continued to twist and flicker across Korra’s skin, she could only blink back tears as she gasped and choked on the sobs catching in her chest as she tried to catch her breath.

Learn to love freely, and you have learned how to live. 

Raava’s signs completely covered Korra from head to toe and she could feel the spirit merging with her soul, making her feel more complete and whole than she could ever recall feeling before. Korra closed her eyes as she basked in the sensation and let the light and love around her lull her into peaceful oblivion.


End file.
